Sunday 7 March 2010

Tomorrow's ‘Totally Unexpected’ Animal Attack Today!

These tigers look like they're about to make a meal out of a group of unsuspecting swimmers as they leap into the water.

The big cats launch themselves from the poolside and, with enormous paws outstretched, look like they could do some serious damage.
They do.

And they can.
But, despite appearances, these pictures actually show zoo keepers playing with the stripy creatures in the water.
‘Stripy creatures’..?
It may look like a terrifying game of cat and mouse but, according to wildlife photographer Kathleen Reeder, no one gets hurt.
That’s not right, surely? It should read ‘no one’s got hurt…yet’.
'It's like playing with your house cat with a toy. You wave the toy in front of the cat to get the cat to chase it.'
Well, yes. It would be exactly like playing with your housecat, if your housecat weighed 500lbs and was an undomesticated killing machine…
Miss Reeder, who has been a wildlife photographer for 10 years, said: 'These tigers love their keepers so they don't protract their claws when chasing or jumping into the water.'
‘Protract’..?!

Damn, now it’s not just her sanity I’m questioning, it’s her English language skills…

But surely there are safety precautions, right?

Oh:
'There will always be two keepers in the water to make sure that things don't get out of hand.'
You mean to say, arousing the hunting instincts of a 500lb predatory cat is quite safe, because there are two - count 'em, two - 90lb unarmed humans in the water with them?

Well, I'm reassured...

6 comments:

Macheath said...

Three words; Siegfried and Roy

Mark Wadsworth said...

'Protract' is the opposite of 'retract'. I don't see the mistake.

JuliaM said...

It's usually - when talking about animals - 'unsheath' or 'extend'.

NickM said...

My father-in-law once gave me this sage piece of advice...

"Never annoy a shark"

Whilst true I thought it somewhat unneeded advice.

Maybe not.

Macheath, :-)

PS Counting Cats is my blog (that and Mr Cats and PA of course) and as a feline themed site I just have to...

... Do I have to? Madness. I play string with little Timmy but with something that can bite a leg off. It's madness I tells ya! Madness!

Chuckles said...

On the theory that, 'I don't have to swim faster than the tiger, I only have to swim faster than you...'

Vetnurse said...

I don't like to annoy a normal house cat they are bad enough and people do not realise the damage they can do.