Thursday 8 December 2011

It’s Enough To Make A Stone Weep…

A Carlisle man who was caught with his dead brother’s illegal stun gun has been spared a lengthy prison sentence – after a judge took pity on him because of his “truly exceptionally” tragic family history.
Oh, noes! *cue country & western music*
Michael Celmins, who turns 22 next month, could have been given the suggested minimum five-year sentence the Government has sanctioned for anyone caught with illegal firearms. But a judge at the city’s crown court said the way he had come to be in possession of the gun would have made such a sentence unjust.
It better be good!
Instead Celmins, of Orton Road, Carlisle, was given four months for possessing an illegal gun, with an extra 16 months – making 20 months in all – for possessing cannabis with intent to supply it.
It better be very good!
The court heard Celmins inherited the gun – a stun gun disguised as a mobile phone – after one of his brothers died in 2009.
Awwww… *sad face*
That followed the deaths of his parents, Edward and Christine, who died in a car crash near Great Orton…
*holds back a tear*
… and the death of his uncle Karl…
*lip quivering now*
who was killed by another brother, Edward in 2008.




Ummm…
At first Celmins claimed he had got the gun – which could cause pain but not death – from a friend who had himself bought it in Turkey. But that, Mr Thomas said, was only because he did not want to admit that it was his late brother’s.
Well, indeed. It could tarnish the family name, or something…
“He did not initially tell the truth because he wanted to protect the memory and reputation of his brother,” he said.
Which one? The dead one, the murdered one, or the murderous one?
“This was in reality guilt by inheritance,” he said. “He was unaware of the gun’s existence until after his brother’s death.

“There is no suggestion that he had ever taken it out of the house or had it with him at any time when he could have used it.”
Yes, well, fair one. I mean, what possible reason for having a stun gun would he have, with his murky family history, and his drug dealing?

Perish the thought!

Now, I seem to have a lot of unused tissues here…

11 comments:

Furor Teutonicus said...

XX after one of his brothers died in 2009.XX

So? He's got another one. Not as if he was left without, or anything.

Macheath said...

Blimey, Julia, you've unearthed a family saga worthy of the nastier end of Greek mythology.

Here's the brother's case from 2009:

A Carlisle man who throttled his uncle to death after they fell out over his dead mother’s ring has failed to convince Appeal Court judges his sentence was too tough.

The 25-year-old, of Dobinson Road, challenged his sentence at London’s Appeal Court yesterday, claiming insufficient account was taken of the “tragic” facts of his case.


I wonder if they always use the same lawyer.

Anonymous said...

Iss F-A-A-A-M-LEE innit! Just like the TREEBY pikey clan of Tovil, Maidstone

http://www.kentonline.co.uk/kent_messenger/news/2010/december/10/treeby_murder_trial_verdict.aspx

Luckily the murdered man's bruv topped hisself in nick later. http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-england-kent-11981241

At least Jack had Xmas dinner before his bruv, neff-yews and their mum killed him.

Bee-yoo-ti-ful.

Jim said...

It seems if you are a drug dealer you get let off, whereas if you are a law abiding memeber of the middle classes who makes a genuine mistake you get 3 years inside.

http://www.fwi.co.uk/Articles/01/04/2011/126181/Farmers-warned-over-falling-foul-of-gun-laws.htm

pflucked parrot said...

"It’s Enough To Make A Stone Weep…"

...Indeed. It's up there with a combover in the wind.

Tattyfalarr said...

He inherited it ? You mean it was specifically left to him in a legally drafted and professionally executed will ? He does mean that, doesn't he ?

Or has the translation of to inherit come to mean "found under the bed/down the back of the sofa/hidden in the gas cupboard when rooting round your dead relatives property for anything you can get your hands on."

DerekP said...

From that article about farmers and guns:
"...the truth got me banged up so quickly I didn't even feel my head spin until I was being strip searched in prison that afternoon."

The law and the police find it difficult to deal with career criminals, but easy to manipulate and victimise people of honest intent who fall foul of poorly framed and badly intended legislation.

I thought of Emma West when the story mentioned the dangers of having to mix with the general prison population.

But I also thought of Danny O'Shea's parents, and I wondered how the police managed to get their grief-stricken statment that broadly said his murder couldn't have been racially motivated because the victim was such a well-liked chap. Clearly a deranged logic, because the murderers do not take on the victim's character and attributes.

That statement, however, has meant that Danny's murder will definitely not be investigated with the equivalent resources of the Stephen Lawrence murder enquiry.

Clearly a win for whichever police officers obtained that statement, and the senior officers who have to manage that budget. And a win for the murderers too, of course. They know the rest of us are losers.

Anonymous said...

I'm surprised there's anyone left in that family.

WV= andeds = all relatives no longer with us

JuliaM said...

"Blimey, Julia, you've unearthed a family saga worthy of the nastier end of Greek mythology."

These tales from chavland do rather have a whiff of Agamemnon about them, don't they? I suspect a Greek audience might find them too far fetched!

"At least Jack had Xmas dinner before his bruv, neff-yews and their mum killed him."

*chortle*

"Or has the translation of to inherit come to mean "found under the bed/down the back of the sofa/hidden in the gas cupboard when rooting round your dead relatives property for anything you can get your hands on.""

Indeed!

"But I also thought of Danny O'Shea's parents, and I wondered how the police managed to get their grief-stricken statment that broadly said his murder couldn't have been racially motivated because the victim was such a well-liked chap. "

I wondered about that too....

Anonymous said...

You actual horrible bastard!!!! He had 5 brothers, another has died since this article and also his sister last year! This family has suffered enough without the likes of you, who I can only presume by your lack of empathy that you has never experienced a close family death!! 3 siblings, both parents in the same RTA, an uncle, a grandma x2 & a 10 day old baby!!!

Anonymous said...

What does that mean? You’re surprised that there’s anyone left in that family? What surprises you so much oh and since this another brother has died and a sister to suicide, 3 siblings! And parents before that! I find it disgusting that people are chatting about Chav life when we are not chavs and never have been!!