Tuesday, 27 December 2011

Arse-Covering….

Council officials have been ordering homeowners to remove any potential missiles that could be used in future attacks.
This is in the wake of the A12 incidents, of course.

Though, given all the varied things that could possibly be considered a ‘missile’ to the deranged individuals responsible, I think that’s quite an undertaking.
Richard Day, who lives just metres away from the A12 on Church Road, Mountnessing, was told by Brentwood Borough Council to hide or remove two bucket-shaped bollards which are used to stop people parking on the grass verge outside his house.

The 60-year-old was told that if he did not remove them he could face legal proceedings.
Because, no doubt, the council’s worried that they themselves could face the same, for allowing them on ‘their’ land.

If it is their land in the first place; there’s some dispute:
He said: "The county council has said that the borough council owns the land and Brentwood Borough Council has said that Lord Petre owns it.

"Neither seems to know what's going on.

But in any case they have told me to move them inside my gate.

"It is stupid. How is moving a bollard a few yards inside my gate going to change anything? All they have to do is walk into the property and pick it up from my garden."
Well, quite. But no doubt they are thinking of some way of prohibiting that too.

It’s what the authorities do now, because to be seen to be doing nothing at all can’t possibly pass muster.

I suppose if it gets rid of garden gnomes, it’ll be a blessing in disguise…

10 comments:

North Northwester said...

The gravity menace must be stopped!

Ban gravitation now and imprison all those who act upon its siren call of evil!
Death to Isaac Newton!
Down with bungee jumpers... I mean, up with bungee jumpers.

Captain Ranty said...

We really are just children to these power-crazed freaks.

In my present frame of mind I would have refused. Just to see what happened next.

All in the name of research, of course.

CR.

Tattyfalarr said...

Won't someone please think of the "children" ? If you hide everything they could possibly throw they will just end up throwing each other off motorway bridges.

With a bit of luck.

Pat said...

Ah, so that explains why all those gully covers are being removed!
And here was me thinking they were being stolen.

Furor Teutonicus said...

From the Mail link;
XX Three teenage boys from Chelmsford were arrested and eliminated in 2009 XX

Ahh. If ONLY that were the case....

Able said...

"Three teenage boys from Chelmsford were arrested and eliminated in 2009"

So that means they were arrested and then.. probably given some extra money, free trips, holidays, etc. because they weren't bad and were only trying to commit murder because society failed them.

Hmm, wonder if they wanted some new trainers or an iThing for Christmas.

Here's a novel idea. Why don't the council and the police... arrest and punish the scrotes responsible (instead of rewarding them and punishing the law-abiding normal people of the area for the crime of 'having something that some scrote might possibly use in a crime'.

I think we should place the councilors in a position to monitor the situation, and if we're lucky then it will be them thrown off the bridge.

Captain Haddock said...

Simply inform the Council that you've carried out a Health & Safety risk assessment and consider that moving them might damage your back ..

If they want them moved, best they make the necessary arrangements (at their expense) because you're quite happy for them to remain where they are ..

WV = "thoin" .. as in "Pog ma thoin" ..

Henry Crun said...

So the borough council "owns" the land? If that is the case, then surely the land belongs to all the residents of that particular borough.

JuliaM said...

"Down with bungee jumpers... I mean, up with bungee jumpers."

:D

"We really are just children to these power-crazed freaks."

Yes, we really are. Sadly, they often behave no better themselves.

"If you hide everything they could possibly throw they will just end up throwing each other off motorway bridges."

Let's hope not! Think of the traffic chaos!

"Ah, so that explains why all those gully covers are being removed!

And here was me thinking they were being stolen."


Perhaps the best we can hope for is that the Caravan Utilising Nomadic Travellers come across these little creatures attempting to get there first to a big piece of bronze..?

JuliaM said...

"Ahh. If ONLY that were the case...."

:D Sadly, Able is likely to have been spot on about their fate.

"I think we should place the councilors in a position to monitor the situation, and if we're lucky then it will be them thrown off the bridge."

They're so full of crap they'd probably bounce...