Thursday, 17 July 2008

OMFG! Deadly New Knife! Run For The Hills!!

Just in case people weren’t already aware of the threat of knife crime, the Met Police have decided to provide tabloids with even more headline articles by warning of ‘The Wasp’:
Senior police officers have been warned to look out for a new knife which can inject a ball of compressed gas into its victim that instantly freezes internal organs.

The 'wasp knife', which can deliver a ball of compressed gas capable of killing its victim at the press of a button, may be heading for Britain, the Metropolitan Police fear.

A needle in the tip of the blade shoots out the frozen ball of gas which instantly balloons to the size of a basketball, freezing organs.

The Metropolitan Police have told colleagues in the West Midlands to be on the lookout for the blade, which is designed to kill sharks and bears.
So, they must have evidence that these knives are in the country, then..? Well, no:
A source close to West Midlands Police said: "The Met is obviously concerned about this and that is why they have circulated the information.

"This knife will almost certainly kill and the Met must have intelligence that they are in circulation.

"I think it is only a matter of time before one of these is used because the internet makes it much easier to find and buy weapons like this."
Oh, the Internet! Is there anything it can’t do….?

So, if the Met has intelligence, let’s see it. Or are they just scaremongering? Perhaps they want funding to set up a new ‘Internet Knife Crime Monitoring Team’…

Of course, that doesn’t stop the usual rent-a-quote politicos from horning in to get their tuppence-worth of publicity:
Labour MP for Perry Barr in Birmingham, Khalid Mahmood, said: "Weapons like this are absolutely disgraceful and there is no reason at all why people should be walking around the streets with them.”
Very true. But there’s also no evidence that people actually are walking around the streets with them either…

But then, ‘horrible knife not on streets of UK yet as far as we know’ isn’t going to sell any newspapers, is it….?

2 comments:

Moriarty said...

If there were none of these knives here before, there certainly will be now they've been so well advertised.

Not too many I suppose though, they don't sound very cheap to buy.

Juliam said...

Oh, I don't know.

Sell a few wraps of coke and a knocked-off sat nav, or swap an imported Eastern European army-surplus handgun, and you're there... ;)