Friday, 26 February 2010

Quote of the Month

This month, we have NickM from 'Counting Cats...' on the odd and disturbing case of Theresa Winters:
...that story is just utterly awful. So, after fourteen kids she’s got a contraceptive implant in a bid to get ‘em back to her one bedroom flat… Talk about horses and stable doors. The stallion in this case has been thoroughly Shergar-ed already, love. Hell, if she’d got to fifteen she’d have a complete Rugby Union team! Was that the ambition? God knows. She gives birth about as often as I see the dental hygienist. Did she not at any point think to either use some form of contraception earlier or stop shagging the miserable scrote she’s shacked-up with in Luton (it had to be some shit-hole like Luton). I mean there can’t be much in it for him either. It must be like chucking a Marlboro Light down Deansgate by now. She could try Kegel exercises until the heat death of the Universe and her vayjayjay (to quote Oprah who is probably in talks as I type) would still resemble Dumbledore’s sleeve.


Dave H said...

Vaguely on this theme, one of the most perplexing aspects of the Karen Matthews story was how on earth she could have seven children by (one assumes) ‘natural’ methods. What man could ever possibly find the, er, motivation?

I can only assume the effects of Stella must include a brief transitional period between loss of vision and failure of tumescence.

blueknight said...

'... like a bill stickers glue pot'.As we used to say in polite conversation

JuliaM said...

"What man could ever possibly find the, er, motivation?"

They say you don't look at the mantelpiece when you're stoking the fire, but...

"As we used to say in polite conversation"