Tuesday 2 March 2010

Is It ‘Cos They Is..?

Dear, dear Yasmin in the ‘Indy’:
Some people say I see race everywhere, seek it out even almost addictively, that bad things happen to everyone and life is tough, that on the whole the country is tolerant and does not deny opportunities and rights to people of colour. Anti-racists like me complain too much and only alienate the natives.
No! Really? Tell me more...
Maybe these people are right.
Hmmm, maybe. But I suspect the real answer is goig to be that they are wrong, eh Yaz?
Being alert to racial injustice is like having an over-sensitive aerial that picks up a cacophony of sounds, some that may need to be ignored.
It sounds like a terrible burden, to be sure...
So I tried not to think about race when recent stories broke of celebrity blokes behaving deceitfully.
Eh..?

Oh, she means Tiger Woods, Ashley Cole and John Terry.
They hurt their wives. It was a man thing.

But then I realised that is not how others saw it. Several conversations I overheard and some I had, saw mixed-race Woods and Cole as cheating "black" men. John Terry was just John Terry the charlatan. His race didn't count.
Umm, well, no.

After all, it wasn't their race that got them into trouble, but a certain part of their anatomy that, at times, commandeers so much of the blood that there's not enough to run the brain as well....
After Woods was exposed as a serial philanderer I went along to one of those barber's shops that sculpts Afro hair into beautiful designs. It was a man place and I had to persuade them to let me in to talk about Tiger.

Ash, 24 was unforgiving. Tiger is a traitor, "to his wife, to us black people and to himself". He is "messed up in a white man's world, collecting trophies for sport and sex, as if then he can be a real man. I feel sorry for him. A billionaire and he got no balls". Lee, Jasp, Trevor all agreed.
Oh, well researched! I wonder if they'd have said just about anything to get this idiot out from under their feet....
The black American comedienne Sheryl Underwood also blasted the randy golfer: "The issue comes in when you choose something white because you think it's better. If you never date a black woman or women of colour you never sample the international buffet of human beings. If you never do that, we've got a problem."
I can see why she's a comedienne. A real scream, to be sure...
When cracks appear in relationships, biological and cultural difference becomes an alibi, an explanation. Uncomfortable questions arise and cannot then be ignored. I do wonder what the reactions would have been to Cole's infidelities if his wife had been a jet black singer or if all his mistresses had been black?
Let me take a wild guess. Just the same?
Did Tiger Woods feel the same need to show that he was a somebody in bed as well as on the golf course in order to impress the white world?
Because that's what impresses us honkies, right?
Race matters, even in the most intimate and private of encounters. Just listen to what people are saying about these scandals as I did. That is reality. No point in denying it.
Because if we did, you'd be out of a job.

Wouldn't you?

17 comments:

Quiet_Man said...

Tbh, I didn't consider Tiger Woods race as having anything to do with his activities, merely his gender. Young sportsmen (not all but certainly enough of them) do seem to have a problem keeping it in their pants and when caught deserve the approbation they get as well as the financial costs of divorce and other reparations. Yet I doubt Tiger Woods did it because he wanted to impress the "white" world, I suspect he did it because he was tempted and he could. Of course only someone obsessed by race would think otherwise, which was your point.

English Viking said...

This fat hag is only jealous. Barge-poles spring to mind.

Costello said...

Well for one thing Tiger Woods isn't really black and does not, and never has, defined himself as 'Black'. When asked how he classed himself (by Oprah i think) he said he was 'Cablasian' - caucasian/black/asian. Anyway, it's been most amusing seeing the reaction of the black racial grievance lobby in the US to his preference for white/blonde women.

staybryte said...

Even by Yazza's frankly bizarre standards that article was a lulu. I particularly liked this:
"After Woods was exposed as a serial philanderer I went along to one of those barber's shops that sculpts Afro hair into beautiful designs."

Note that they don't "cut" hair. They "sculpt it into beautiful designs."

"It was a man place and I had to persuade them to let me in to talk about Tiger."

I've visions of Yazza banging on the door, demanding they let her in, while the proprietor inched nervously towards the panic alarm and hid the scissors...

"Lee, Jasp, Trevor all agreed."

"Lee, Jasp, Trevor", oh Yazza you tease. You made it all up and you were doing so well. Could you not have made a bit more effort right at the last with those names?

Nemesis said...

"Lee, Jasp, Trevor all agreed."

These names do sound suspiciously like disgraced race-pimp Lee Jasper and top race commissar Trevor Philips. How odd...

Anonymous said...

The Yazzmonster and her like believe that 'anti-racism' is going to get them something they could not have dreamed off in a thousand years: political, social, economic and physical power over White people in White counties.

To put it mildly she has jumped the gun, pun intended.

Notice she said nothing about last night's Despatches investigation into corruption in Tower Hamlets.
Nothing racial there, my friend.


Richard

woman on a raft said...

It's not race or gender which is the problem with Yazzer - I've come to the conclusion that she's completely alien, even more so that Mr Spock, who at least had a human mother.

This would explain her inability to understand anything from a human viewpoint. It's a sad cosh on the head for the literary convention of the alien observing humans and reflecting back wry and pithy observations. Turns out that they would say hopelessly dumb things through not understanding basic drives, such as sex.

Anonymous said...

From recollection, Tiger Woods got caught shagging away from home and was castigated by the press and public.

John Terry's extra curricular swordsmanship was also exposed and he also received a mauling by the press, public opinion, and the Chelsea home fans.

Ashley Cole is the latest. Despite my sister's protestations that he is in fact gay Ashley seems to have fought against his natural instincts and shagged a whole bunch of young 'ladies' who have in turn betrayed him to the News of the World. Once again Ashley has been (do you sense a pattern here?) castigated by the press, public and Cheryl's Mum.

So the question is... where the f*ck does Yasmin manage to find racism in that lot? This woman really is utterly batshiat. She could find racism in an apple if she tried.

Seriously, Yasmin is vying for the top of the moron list with Queen Harriet herself. I can't believe the Indi publishes the dirge she comes out with - they must be seeing out thier contract or something.

Anonymous said...

"You never sample the international buffet of human beings" What is this, an invitation to canibalism - an "all you can eat smorgasbord?"
I would surmise the problem is that they were at it like knives and when that piece of anatomy is doing the thinking I don't think race (beyond human) is much of a consideration.
TTFN
Michael :)

Blognor Regis said...

Point of information: I am ready sample from all around that buffet. Form an orderly queue ladies.

My theme song -

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fdunfba4jnw

DJ said...

The best bit is that the Yazzmonster hears some black dudes and a black chick condemn a guy as a race traitor for dating outside the race, and that proves white people are raycist.

Of course.

Anonymous said...

"She could find racism in an apple if she tried."

Of course apples are racist - what colour are they?

Steve said...

Lovely.
Almost makes it worth our country being awash with handwringing jackasses like Yazza to read takedowns like this.
But not quite.

Foxy Brown said...

Some people say I see race everywhere.

Yazza, I think it's a bit more than some.

JuliaM said...

"Tbh, I didn't consider Tiger Woods race as having anything to do with his activities, merely his gender."

So did all normal people.

"This fat hag is only jealous."

That might well be a part of it. Anything Vanessa Feltz writes on the subject of infidelity always seems to have that faint whiff of mad-eyed scorekeeping...

"...Tiger Woods isn't really black and does not, and never has, defined himself as 'Black'."

I doubt people's own descriptions of themselves bother the Yazzmonster one bit. She'll assign the racial designations, thankyewverymuch...

"Even by Yazza's frankly bizarre standards that article was a lulu."

She does seem to be out to top herself lately, doesn't she?

Sadly, not in the idiomatic sense...

JuliaM said...

"Notice she said nothing about last night's Despatches investigation into corruption in Tower Hamlets.
Nothing racial there, my friend."


Oh, indeed. We know from what's not said what the real score is...

"...I've come to the conclusion that she's completely alien, even more so that Mr Spock, who at least had a human mother. "

I think that's probably the best way to look at it.

"This woman really is utterly batshiat. She could find racism in an apple if she tried."

It's her living. Literally!

"Point of information: I am ready sample from all around that buffet. Form an orderly queue ladies."

Heh! :)

Furor Teutonicus said...

Who cares who is shagging who, so long as he does not try it on me?

Besides, the only reason he has balls at all, is because golfers need them for their hobby.