"What," asks the teacher, "have Sir Elton John, Alexander the Great, William Shakespeare and Clare Balding got in common?"A real mixed bag (and that's just Pam St Clement!).
Other slides flash up at the front of the class: Sir Ian McKellen, Julius Caesar, Martina Navratilova, Richard the Lionheart, Oscar Wilde and Pam St Clement (EastEnders' Pat Butcher) .
So, anyone hazard a guess?
After some discussion, the answer arrives: they are all gay, lesbian or bisexual – Shakespeare is said to have been bisexual, this class is told – and they all feature in a new drive pioneered at a north London comprehensive which is trying to stamp out homophobic bullying.Well, why not? I'm sure they can fit it in somewhere, after all the anti-obesity and family planning lessons....
"We had noticed that students were using the way 'gay' in the playground and it was seen as a term of abuse," said headteacher Annie Gammon.Far better than trying to teach a bunch of unruly, dim brats that 2 = 2 = 4, eh, Elly?
Elly Barnes, the teacher who devised it, is now training staff from across the country to use the material. She has even had an approach from a school in Perth, western Australia.
The way the programme works at Stoke Newington is that all pupils attend joint assemblies on the issue and then it is fed into the curriculum of different subjects during a month set aside for stressing the contribution of gay, lesbian and bisexual people in history.A month..? A whole month?
Ms Gammon added: "One parent saw homosexuality as a sin and didn't want their child to be part of lessons. We had a discussion and their child participated. We are not a religious school and I feel it is a human rights issue."I feel it isn't for the education system to poke their nose in until they've managed to regain a successful system for churning out anything other than cannon-fodder, Ms Gammon...
The school plans to use the same approach to the subject of disability, using famous role models such as Professor Stephen Hawking.Give me strength!
This is, of course, the inevitable result of allowing groups to self-identify as anything other than people. People with disabilities, people with sexualities, people with cultural backgrounds.
Now, we have groups. The people themselves? They are getting lost in the cacophony of shouted 'rights'....