All Fried Food?

There will be a boost for fresh fruit and vegetables and deep-fried food will be banned in what the government has called the biggest shake-up to school dinners in England in over a decade.

Will it include samosas, onion bahjis and gulab jamun as well as the fish and chips then? I wonder…

Under new school food standards, fibre and wholegrains will also be increased, and breakfast clubs will have to follow nutrition rules for the first time, with schools also being monitored.

That’s not going to be cheap, unless they plan to add it to OFSTED inspectorate tasks… 

The Association of School and College Leaders (ASCL) welcomed the changes, but said they hoped the new rules would not become "another stick with which to beat head teachers".

The changes will come into effect from 2027 and be funded with existing money for schools, the government said.

Then they DO plan for OFSTED to take it on, instead of creating another inspection regime. 

Education Secretary Lucy Powell said they were "once-in-a-generation changes" which would "transform school food for children across the country".

I’m sure we all expected a government to busy themselves with that, instead of protecting the country’s borders, when we entered the ballot box, didn’t we?

Pepe Di'Iasio, ASCL general secretary, said parents would feel "reassured" that schools were providing children with a healthy diet.He said schools needed "more investment" in catering facilities and in the "professional development" of school chefs to develop menus that "meet the ambitions" of the government.

The ambitions of this particular government? One would hope they would be a little more statesmanlike, but in vain…

Breakfast clubs will undergo one of the biggest changes. Historically, there has been no guidance on what they should provide, but from next September pastries and fried-eggs will be off the menu and there will be a sugar cap when it comes to cereals.The government said Coco Pops would no longer be an option and chocolate spread was "not permitted".

No croissants, that’s not very European of us, and whatever happened to ‘Go to work on an egg’? 

Well, You Are How You Feel, Eh?

Being sent a shiny new phone in the post that you were not expecting may sound great, but it could well be a sign you have just been scammed. Criminals might have got into your account, added a new handset to your bill, before asking you to "return" it - to their address. Nearly 30,000 cases like this were recorded last year of what a telecommunications boss described as "at scale, organised crime".

Organised, yes, but like any good scam, reliant on the naivety and/or greed of the mark. As Longrider has frequently pointed out...

So, what sort of greedy naive idiot has fallen for this one? 

The Reverend Jenny Seggar, rector of the Two Rivers Benefice near Ipswich, fell victim to this type of fraud last year and told the BBC's Scam Secrets podcast how the "very plausible" technique unfolded.

There follows a story few people wouldn’t have smelled a rat with! 

When Seggar contacted Tesco Mobile, staff told her the QR code led to a private address - meaning the fraudsters had bagged themselves a brand new iPhone and Apple Watch. "I got back into the car and I thought, 'Oh, I think I've just been really stupid. I don't like how this feels'," Seggaar added.

Yes, you have. 

Seggar's experience is part of a pattern of increasingly sophisticated scam activity across the telecommunications industry. 

Not really that sophisticated at all  

Well, Yeah...

Only one confirmed member of the species is known - a cat living in a rescue sanctuary in Bolivia - but scientists believe others exist.

You don't have to be a scientist to know that, do you? 

Sunday Funnies...

I feel as if a warning on No 12 that a Tom Cruise film 'isn't hisorically accurate' is somewhat redundant.

That's Modern 'Customer Service' These Days...

A retired soldier has revealed his shock at an exchange with a member of staff at the gift shop during a recent visit to the museum in south London.My 11-year-old daughter asked if there would be a veteran's discount,' the former serviceman told the Mail. The reply stunned him. 'The woman at the till said, 'We have nothing to do with the military - that's not who we are'.'

Where were they trying to visit? Why only the Imperial War Museum in London! And there was no description of the menmber of staff in question, but I think we can guess, can't we? 

The IWM said it had begun an investigation. A spokesman said it was 'very sorry to hear about this visitor's experience' and apologised 'if he or his daughter felt unwelcome during their visit'.

Should be a very short investigation, and it should begin in your HR department. 

OK, Boris, Here's An Idea For You...

...let's push for this, and if Pakistan wants a swetener to consider it, we extradite Tulip Siddique. 

Deal? 

He is, of course, Imran Khan, the former prime minister from 2018 to 2022, and his suffering is now becoming a global scandal. Since leaving office he has been subjected to a barrage of politically motivated cases, designed to eradicate him permanently from public life. These charges have been so blatantly without merit that they have mostly collapsed – all except one: an accusation that Imran Khan’s government steered some UK government cash towards a certain property developer, who then made a handsome donation to a university that had connections to Imran and his wife.

Are we expected to meddle in every foreign court case regarding the misappopriation of UK funds, because there's lot of them...

Even if it is true that Imran has some sort of case to answer in the so-called Al-Qadir case (and it is far from clear to me that he does), he has done nothing to deserve the kind of mental and physical torture he is getting. Above all, he deserves to have his appeal heard speedily and by an independent court. Instead he is being left literally to rot to death in jail. That is because this case was never about corruption, since he has been in fact one of the most open and transparent Pakistani politicians of modern times.

Imran Khan tried to change the way Pakistan works, and paid a price. That is essentially why he is in jail.

Thet is, undoubtedly, still a matter for Pakistan, and not for the UK. 

You can object to some of the attitudes he struck, and to his teenage anti-Americanism, but nothing he said or did can conceivably justify the brutality with which the Pakistani generals are treating the former PM: banged up in foul conditions, with deteriorating health, no date for a new trial and no apparent hope of release. Why are they doing it? Simple: they are scared of him. Imran Khan is one of the greatest cricketing heroes Pakistan – or the world – has ever produced. He led his country to its first ever test victories over both India and England, and in 1992, at the age of 39, he steered Pakistan to its first World Cup victory.

Sorry, Boris, but the fact he's pretty good at sport - and boring sport at that - is no better reason to take an interest. 

They Don't Take Such Provocation Lying Down In France, Unlike In Batley

A father has been jailed after telling his son's teacher he would behead her 'if she was a man' in a case that has shocked France. Abdelkader B., 47, was sentenced after a fast-track hearing on Thursday, six days after the threatening incident in Le Fauga, a village with a population of about 2,600 just outside Toulouse.

And unlike here, the other teachers got behind the victim: 

In Le Fauga, the teacher's co-workers refused to go into the school due to the incident on September 4. The teacher has been granted official protection and is now on sick leave.

The Muslim tried to lie his way out of it, but wasn’t successful: 

However, his testimony did not match the victim's or the witnesses', who said the first beheading threat was launched in the car park. He then followed the teacher after she went into the school and was heard saying, 'Don't be surprised if tomorrow [my son] comes with a knife and stabs you,' by another teacher.

In light of France's history, Ms Momasso Momasso, who is also a lawyer for the Toulouse education authority, said the remarks are 'no longer tolerable in France in 2026'.

So when were they tolerable in France?

Abdelkader B. apologised and said he 'was really not proud' of himself', insisting he was 'not a violent person'. He has been sentenced to six months behind bars. He has also been ordered to take a citizenship course and has been banned from going near the victim or contacting the school for three years.

Why expect citizenship from such a creature, he should be deported with all his family, surely?

It is believed that the boy and his younger sister will be moved to a school outside of Le Fauga.

In a Muslim country, preferably! 

You Don’t Have To Be Mad to Work Here…

... but you should be easily distinguishable from the inmates!

Staff falsified records, slept and were on their phones on the night one patient was killed by another on an NHS mental health unit in east London, an inquest has heard.

And that isn’t even the worst part!

Obamwonyi told the inquest Hugo wasn't breathing and he couldn't find a pulse. He raised the alarm but locked the door into the room. He said he thought it was too late to start CPR, and he wanted to preserve the crime scene.

And nor is this, despite the fact anyone who has done first aid training knows you don't stop resuscitation efforts unless the casualty's head is separate from their body! Only a qualified doctor can confirm death!

 

Here’s the worst part: 

Witnesses at the inquest described chaotic scenes. Nurse Chukwuji-Ohanachum was screaming and throwing herself on the ground. According to a statement read in court, she had to be restrained by other members of staff. One member of staff was left to do chest compressions on Hugo until she had to stop, exhausted.

And even worse than that is the probability, nay, the certainty, that this won’t in any way change the NHS desire to hire unqualified Africans. I suppose we should be thankful it’s only at nurse level.

Oh. I spoke too soon.

Always Remember Why You're Hired...

Rapper Macklemore has been dropped from Ed Sheeran's US tour after making pro-Palestinian comments on stage earlier this month.

And predictably, the usual suspects are up in arms about it! 

The artist - whose real name is Benjamin Haggerty - had been the opening act for Sheeran's Loop tour, but was criticised by Jewish groups after saying "Free Palestine" at two concerts and making political speeches. Macklemore stood by his comments on Monday, confirming that he had been cut from the tour and writing in a statement that the real victims are the Palestinian people in Gaza.

Ed Sheeran has not yet commented, and who will replace Macklemore for the rest of the tour is unknown.

And now even more third-rate acts are throwing their toys out of the pram and turning down probably the best chance of paid work to come along in a long time, all to virtue signal over a bunch of Stone Age savages.

The controversy began on 4 September, when Macklemore, a long-time pro-Palestine activist, performed at Ed Sheeran's concert at the MetLife Stadium in New Jersey. He told the audience: "A big part of the reason why I wanted to do this tour in the first place is so that I could stand up in stadiums like this and say two words that are very, very dear to my heart: Free Palestine."

All of the remaining support acts on Ed Sheeran's US tour have quit, after the rapper Macklemore was dropped from the line-up for making pro-Palestinian remarks on stage. Among them were Finneas, the brother of pop star Billie Eilish, who said in a statement: "Artists must not be silenced when they speak up for the oppressed."

Expecting you to do the thing you were hired for (sing) instead of what you want to do (hector concertgoers) isn’t ‘silencing’, you absurd child!

Another Day, Another Chance For the Police Farce To Step In the Brown Smelly Stuff…

Noah's devastated father, Rhys Woods, this morning pleaded with the public to help, saying he 'cannot go another night knowing he's out there alone' and urging people not to give up hope. Posting to Facebook, Mr Woods said: 'We still have nothing, all the emergency services and all of you have shown how strong this community is, with people coming from far and wide also. 

'The emergency services are very confident that the high risk areas (Decoy pond, railway lines) are all clear

And barely was the ink dry on that public statement when the kid's body was found in that very same pond...

But I’m sure the hapless police comms officer who issued that fateful statement was trained to the hilt on ‘inclusive language policy’ or some such bollocks.