Monday, 17 June 2019

Don't Expect Any 'Fast, Effective Relief' From This Rennie...

A convicted armed robber was given a last chance to avoid prison after ...
Declaring his intention to go straight? Saving an orphan from a house fire? Impressing the judge with his commitment to his aged mother?
...failing to show up for community service.
Ummm...
Judge David Rennie accepted the case had exceptional circumstances and imposed a two-year suspended prison sentence, with 300 hours of unpaid work and 30 rehabilitation sessions with the Positive Futures Programme.
Oh, yes! I remember this case now.
But last week, Bassett, now 22, appeared back before the judge at Hove Crown Court after failing to attend the unpaid work days.
Andrew Stephens, prosecuting, said Bassett has only completed 37 hours of unpaid work in the past year, leaving 263 hours outstanding. He said the probation have had no contact with him since April, and believed all options had been exhausted.
Except one, of course. But heaven forfend the judge actually does what he's put in place to do!
Judge Rennie invited a tearful Bassett into the witness box to explain why he should be allowed to continue with unpaid work, despite being brought before the courts for breaches in November and February, and most recently in April.
He didn't even bother with any inventive excuse. Why should he, after all?
Bassett, formerly of Hailsham, said: “I messed up, I know I have messed up badly. All I can do is apologise.
He knew it wasn't worth the effort.
Judge Rennie said: “If we meet again, you will be sending yourself to prison.”
He'll have to. You clearly won't!

Compare And Contrast. Again.

Appalling cruelty resulting in a 10 year ban on keeping animals:
A dog owner has been banned from keeping animals for 10 years after he tried to kill a terrier by shooting it four times in the head with an air rifle before dumping the animal in a bush.
Microchip details revealed Hancock's former partner owned the dog and an RSPCA investigation found Hancock, from Hedge End, brutally attacked the dog and dumped him.
He was convicted of causing unnecessary suffering to an animal following a trial and banned from keeping pets for 10 years, ordered to carry out 200 hours community service and pay £1,621 in costs.
Appalling cruelty resulting in....wait, what?
Paul Oliver was handed a 16-week suspended jail term for allowing his hounds to kill four cubs, causing their “painful, terrifying” deaths.
However, Oliver, who was master of the now-disbanded South Herefordshire Hunt, was not barred from keeping animals because he would have lost his job at a stud yard.
District Judge Joanna Dickens also imposed a 12-week suspended sentence on Hannah Rose, the hunt’s kennel maid
Explaining her reasons for not banning the couple from keeping animals, she added: “I think the chance of any reoccurrence is minimal.
“I also take into account that to disqualify them from being in control of animals would cause them to lose their current employment and any hope of future work, as this is their livelihood.”
Those are what we call 'consequences', judge. Aren't they?

Saturday, 15 June 2019

In Which I'm Forced To Agree With Piers Morgan...

Councillor Andrew Gordon, who represents Lee Chapel North on Basildon Council, took to Twitter to condemn the Good Morning Britain host’s “toxic views”.
About immigration? Racism? Jeremy Clarkson?
The controversial GCSE question asked: “There are 84 calories in 100g of banana. There are 87 calories in 100g of yogurt. Priti has 60g of banana and 150g of yogurt for breakfast. Work out the total number of calories in this breakfast.”
Piers said: “This country is going completely bonkers. We don’t re-write the entire maths paper which has a perfectly reasonable question because somebody may have a trigger moment.
Otherwise - here’s what will happen - with this snowflake generation, you end up with zero questions. You won’t be able to ask any questions about anything because it may trigger somebody and their anxiety - it is nonsense.”
Errr, in other words, like a stopped clock, Morgan is actually right...

What's this idiot's beef, again?
In response Mr Gordon said on Twitter: “My girlfriend had an eating disorder and is unfortunately no longer with us. I had an exam days after she died which asked me to count calories. That question broke me. Piers Morgan if you ever want to be educated on the subject, drop me a line because your views are toxic.
“Unfortunately, I just have to accept there is no real support for people in my shoes. I failed the exam, but oh well.
“That man is so dangerous, he is pushing a narrative that is dangerous and Good Morning Britain just sits back and allows him to shout over everyone who disagrees.
“There is absolutely nothing to gain from exposing someone to such a question. Compassion costs us nothing.”
This isn't 'compassion', any more than coddling a child in cotton wool is 'compassion'. Sooner or later, they have to contend with life, and the realisation that it isn't run to their own personal wishes and desires. They have to learn to cope.

How can anyone elect someone who advertises to the world that he can't?

Another BabySeal™ Bites The Dust...

Ginario Da Costa, Edson's father, said: "Edir's passing has left a huge hole in our lives. Seeing him with his little boy made me so proud, but now his son will have to grow up without his father.
"Losing Edir has broken my heart. We will forever feel that if things had been done differently his life may have been saved."
He added that hearing details of the last moments of Edson's life had been extremely traumatic for the family and something they would never forget.
"We cannot help but wonder whether Edir would still be here had the police identified the risk of Edir choking earlier and taken steps to help him," Mr Da Costa said.
Did the poor man have a medical condition? Was he brutally restrained in a dangerous and illegal fashion?

Well...no.
Cmdr Musker said: "The inquest heard evidence that Mr Da Costa had chosen to swallow 88 wraps of controlled drugs wrapped in a plastic bag in the course of being stopped to avoid detection by police.
"This was not immediately apparent to the officers involved. It is clear that swallowing drugs is a lethally dangerous thing to do."
Well, it's apparent to everyone except the family of this waste of oxygen.

And to the usual suspects, who see yet another campaign slip through their fingers:
Edson is one of five young black men who died within a six-month period following police restraints, according to the charity Inquest. It slammed the tactics the officers and Met's legal teams employed during Edson's inquest.
Deborah Coles, Inquest's director, said she believed "a hostile environment was created through the defensive and combative tactics of police lawyers, who sought to narrow lines of inquiry and divert attention away from the circumstances that resulted in Edir's death.
"This adversarial approach must not be tolerated as it fundamentally undermines the ability of an inquest to seek the truth."
Translation: "Waaah! S'not fair! How dare you not just roll over and let us excoriate you for doing your job (for once)!"
Susie Labinjoh, head of civil liberties at Hodge & Allen, representing the family, said the inquest highlighted concerns about how police respond to people suspected of placing drugs in their mouths.
"A great deal needs to be done, both with officers on the street and those in the control room, to ensure tragedies like this do not happen again," she added.
What 'tragedy'..?

Friday, 14 June 2019

I Feel Most Sorry For The Mice...

The mum of a 15-month old baby who has been in and out of hospital has slammed her housing association for forcing them to live in a house infested with mice.
Brooke Keen, 24, has taken her daughter Desire to A&E about six times in the last seven months with sickness and diarrhoea.
Brooke believes her daughter’s condition is linked to the mouse problem in her flat on Waters Road, which is run by Phoenix Housing Association.
...it can't be nice having to live with chavs, the poor little things.
The mum-of-two, who has lived in the flat for five years, told News Shopper: “I used to love my house, but now I don’t want to live there. I don’t even want any of my stuff because of the mice.”
Despite pleas to Phoenix to be moved out of the house, the housing association has not placed her in a new property – instead using temporary measures to try and get rid of the pests.
She claims the problems have continued despite traps and poison being laid, and despite Brooke's attempts to clean and ventilate the flat.
The pictures in the paper don't show a lot of cleaning, it has to be said...
Brooke, who has a history of depression, believes the ordeal has taken a toll on her own mental and physical health.
Of course she does. How better to get the move she wants than to try the old excuses?
In March, Brooke moved back in with her mum, Carina Keen, in Thornton Heath.
So she hasn't been living there for the last three months after all?
“I’ve seen how it affects her. I watch her washing her hands all the time, like she’s paranoid," Carina told News Shopper. “She should be happy in her own home. Your home is a place you should feel safe. She shouldn’t have to keep running back to me."
She shouldn't expect to sponge off the taxpayer forever either, yet here we are...

Never Say Never, Kim...

Kim Leadbeater is extremely angry. This Sunday marks the third anniversary of the murder of her older sister, the Labour MP Jo Cox.
Oh, it's that time again? Let the griefwhoring begin! Mind you don't step on the toes of the Grenfell Tower mob, love...
‘This week, with the anniversary, is always difficult but then every day is difficult. The sadness and sorrow never disappear. I still haven’t processed what happened properly. We’re very lucky that that individual who killed Jo will never be out of prison.’
Hmmmm, really?


What assurances has the Cox family received that they can confidently say this, I wonder? Because with the parole board, it seems anything can be excused:
The panel said it had found McGreavy had “developed self-control”, and took “full responsibility” for his crimes. It also said he had a “considerable understanding of the problems he has had and what caused them”.
The problems 'he has had'. Not those he caused. So why won't the same apply to Cox's killer some time down the line?

But never mind, there's virtue signalling to be done:
‘Our politics feels bitterly divided. Brexiteers are labelled fascists, Remainers called traitors, people who disagree with us are “The Enemy”... it’s a total mess.’
The statistics seem to back her up. In the short period since Jo was killed, the number of people charged with sending malicious messages has risen by 38 per cent, and the number of death threats reported to the police has risen by 70 per cent in two years.
‘The people I have spoken to are struggling to pinpoint why this is happening, but what I’m clear on is that we need to fix it,’ she says.
It's happening because finally, the public have woken up to what a shower of shits they've elected. 

Thursday, 13 June 2019

What A Load Of Caltrops!

Security pins left "lying around" the floor of a Merseyside superstore are a danger to life and limb, said concerned shoppers.
The potential dangers were highlighted by thalidomide survivor Kevin Donnellon and former Sefton councillor Ralph James, who likened them to "lo-tech anti-personnel devices".
The tags are standard in most clothing stores. However, it was the potential for injury from them being left "pin upwards" on the floor of the Tesco Litherland superstore that concerned campaigners.
Health and safety first!
Kevin Donnellon, 57, is a dad-of-two and thalidomide survivor from Crosby who uses a powered wheelchair.
He said: "I'm always on the lookout for the pins. They're lethal. It's not just the odd one, there's loads.
"As you can see, they are extremely long and sharp and must have presented, during the many years they have been in use, a severe danger to anyone stepping on them such as young children, guide dogs and could easily deflate tyres in wheelchairs or prams."
So how many guide dogs have been injured? How many kiddiewinks punctured? How many wheelchairs put out of action?
Ralph James, 65, a former Sefton councillor from Bootle, said he had picked up "dozens" of the security tags on his visits to the store.
He said: "It's an inherently unsafe design. They bounce out of the box staff throw them in and end up lying all over the floor of the exit aisle at a 45-degree angle.
"There's a danger they could cause sepsis if they were stepped on and caused a puncture wound.
"I want to prevent somebody suffering injury or possibly death as a result of some sort of infection setting in."
Hmmm. I'm starting to think the answer's 'None'. Despite them being around 'for years', according to the complainants...
A Tesco spokesperson said: "These security tags are the standard type used in clothing stores across the UK.
"Unfortunately these particular tags seem to have been misplaced and so we will remind our colleagues of the correct way they should be disposed so they are not found on the floor."
Is that fancy business PR speak for 'Oh, go away & get a life!'...?

This Poor Kid Has No Chance At Life, Has It?

Natasha Tourmentin, 24, told News Shopper her four-year-old son Leo was violently sick after taking a single bite of the burger, which she believes contained traces of cheese.
Leo is severely allergic to eggs, milk and nuts, which means Miss Tourmentin has to take extra care over what he eats.
Except when she's buying him fast food, I guess.
Last month, when Leo was in hospital for an allergy test, Miss Tourmentin bought him a burger.
“He was just refusing to eat anything. He only wanted McDonald’s.”
Let him go hungry. It always worked when my mother tried it (albeit there weren't many McDonalds around back then)!
The mum, who is studying beauty at Bromley College, went to the Lewisham branch of McDonald’s and explained his cheese allergy to staff.
“I even checked the allergen book in there. They gave me a plain burger with ketchup and gherkins, which he can eat, so I gave that to him.”
You clearly didn't check the allergen book very well, then. It states that they can't guarantee there's no cross-contamination.
After Leo’s extended stay in hospital following the reaction, Miss Tourmentin complained to McDonald’s – but had to wait a long time for a response.
“I called into the branch when it first happened and he was still in hospital and they said they would investigate it. It took them over two weeks to respond and it was such a half-hearted apology. They gave me £20 worth of vouchers.
It’s not good enough. It could have cost somebody’s life,” Miss Tourmentin said.
You complained about their food 'nearly killing' your child, they gave you vouchers to buy more of it, and you're complaining it's not enough?

Wednesday, 12 June 2019

When Is An Expert Witness Not An Expert Witness...?

Well, there's a question indeed! A fellow blogger brings me this little gem (pun intended):
Between May 2011 and February 2015, more than 70 victims - mainly vulnerable pensioners - were conned into investing into one of five companies which invested in the diamond and carbon credit industries.
In total, they lost £3.5million and today at Southwark Crown Court eight defendants walked free from court after a judge was forced to deliver not guilty verdicts on multiple fraud charges.
Well, fraud cases are notoriously hard to prosec...

Wait a minute!
The case collapsed following “chaotic” disclosure failures and after the Crown Prosecution Service’s (CPS) key witness, Andrew Ager was discredited as “wholly misleading”.
Oh dear. Well, expert witnesses are often too obscure in their field yo convince a j...

Wait a minute!
Mr Ager, the CPS’s expert witness on the carbon credit trading market, admitted that he had no academic qualifications, had received no training nor had he attended any course on the carbon credit trade.
He said that could not remember if he had passed any A-levels and that he had never read the only book published on what was supposed to be his area of expertise.
Instead, he claimed that he had learned “from his environment”.
Ha ha ha ha ha!

Never mind, CPS, it's only taxpayer's money. And it's not like you'll be on the hook for it, is it?

Who Could Have Predicted This?

Apart from 'anyone with any sense', that is:
Teen knife killer Jordan Jobson has once again ruined her chance of freedom by failing to behave during a spell out of prison. Samantha Madgin's murderer had been due to come before a parole board next month, and was being held in a low security 'open' prison in preparation for when she gets out.
But ChronicleLive understands she has now been returned to a closed jail after failing to comply with conditions when she was allowed out on day release.
The #pussypass has been working overtime on this one:
She was originally handed a minimum jail term of 15 years.
But after two separate appeals that was reduced to 11.
Perhaps she should have gone for another, they might have given her some cash out of the poor box too...

Tuesday, 11 June 2019

Bench Wars!

Two more gangsta rap fans are demanding their town commemorate their hip hop hero.
Oh, the floodgates are now open!
The fans, who gave their names as Neil Whitemore, 40, Graham Staines, 37, want a plaque in Lancing in memory of rapper Tupac Shakur.
It comes after a bench in honour of fellow gangsta rap star Eazy-E was installed in Newhaven, following a £1,500 fundraiser.
Well, lads, there's your target. How are you doing?
So far, the Lancing pair have raised £20 for a small plaque to be fixed to an existing bench in Monks Recreation Ground.
LOL!
Mr Staines said: “Tupac was taken from us too soon over 5,000 miles away in Las Vegas.
When he died, a little bit of Lancing died too.
“The one in Newhaven is too shiny and new and doesn’t represent the struggle of a young African American male in the late 1980s and early 1990s.”
I'm sensing...parody, here. Is it just me?
He was murdered in 1996, aged 25, amid the notorious East Coast/West Coast hip hop rivalry.
The Lancing fans are hoping to avoid reigniting similar tensions between their town, in West sussex, and Newhaven, in East Sussex.
Mr Whitemore said: “Music is something that keeps us together, but in other cases, it actually divides us.
“I just hope Newhaven and Lancing can get along, I mean, no blood has to be spilled over this.
Yup! Thought so. Cunning wheeze, lads.
A Lancing Parish council spokeswoman, who “actually has heard of Tupac” but “doesn’t know how”, believes the campaign will be rejected.
Well, it's been more amusing than most stuff in the local rag...

Those Damned Far Right White... Oh!

The courts are failing to properly deal with a "growing trend" in Islamophobia, said the head of the city's Muslim Welfare Association after a man called takeaway staff "paedophiles" during a drunken tirade.
Some skinhead I bet, pasty-white, covered in tattoos and...
Mohammed Iqbal, also general secretary of the Tallow Hill mosque, said Ravdeep Nangle's case was an example of hate crime which needs "harsher punishment".
Oops!
Nangle also challenged one Shakeeys employee to fight him outside due to his religion – all just weeks after being released from prison for crashing head-on into a taxi while drunk.
Shafquat Reaz, prosecutor, said the row had started because “they were all Muslim” while the defendant is a Sikh.
Well, goodness!

H/T: anon via email

Monday, 10 June 2019

They Gave The Wrong Bitch The Needle...

Emma Butler, who has 38 previous convictions for 78 offences, was ordered to keep her bitch muzzled after it previously attacked a cop who was searching her home back in 2015.
Butler denied police orders, however, when she took the six-year-old dog to a One Stop shop on Hillside Road, Huyton, without its mouth gear on March 1, Liverpool Echo reports.
I think that's 'defied' police orders. And 'mouth gear'?

Are they getting stories edited by people with English as a second language now in Scousetown?
The victim, two-years-old, bent down to pet the dog while her mother shopped at the store, Liverpool Crown Court heard. It was at this point that the dog went for the child, biting her face and leaving her left cheek scarred.
Who, apart from the idiot owner and the mother who wasn't watching her child, is responsible for this?
Butler received a suspended sentence for the dog’s first attack on the police officer and the court heard that she had a history of breaching court orders.
So they just piled more on and hoped for the best?
Cheryl Mottram, defending, said: "She is quite frankly devastated by the incident and the fact that a young child has been injured in this way and that it will have an ongoing effect on the young child and her nervousness around animals particularly dogs.
"As an animal lover, she feels deeply sorry for that impact."
If she was a genuine animal lover, why wouldn't she ensure that her 'pet' wasn't in a position to harm anyone and so sign its own death warrant?
Mottram urged the judge to impose a suspended sentence, because of the harmful effect Butler being jailed would have on her children.
Her request was denied however, as the judge said he had to balance Butler's interests again the seriousness of the incident.
Butler was jailed for 15 months and her dog will be destroyed.
I'm inclined to think that sentence is the wrong way round...

Musical Interlude...

Let's all sing along!

 

He's not wrong, is he?

Saturday, 8 June 2019

It's About Time. Again...

Last Wednesday, we reported how a grieving teenager was charged with ‘causing a public nuisance’ after standing on a ledge over the M602 and threatening to jump, declaring that her life ‘isn’t worth living’.
The 18-year-old, who had just lost her mum and had been self-harming, was berated by magistrates for causing ‘a massive inconvenience’ after her desperate actions closed the road for 20 minutes.
Well, yes. And so they should. Why is the newspaper taking out an onion for this nuisance, instead of the emergency services and innocent members of the public?
Her story prompted outrage from mental health campaigners and M.E.N. readers alike.
So, the usual suspects. *rolls eyes*
Yet within days, another troublingly similar case has come to light, in which a 27-year-old woman - who had disappeared from the Meadowbrook psychiatric unit in Salford after a row over her medication - wandered out into traffic on the same motorway earlier this year.
Police charged her with the rarely-used offence of being ‘excluded traffic’ on a motorway. This morning she was convicted of exactly that, before being taken back to the same unit.
The court heard, in her defence, that while she had 'caused cars using the motorway to slow down', she hadn't put anyone else in danger.
Which is bollocks. Any time you force vehicles to slow down on a motorway, you are indeed putting them and other vehicles at harm. No wonder the court convicted her.

Note that she wasn't sent to prison, just back to the mental health ward.
Stuart Lucas, of the charity’s Manchester branch, said: “Whilst we understand that the police are sometimes placed in stressful situations, a person who is obviously struggling with aspects of their mental health should be treated with understanding, patience and dignity, and not criminalised."
How much patience, Stuart? Because what the Manchester Evening News only mentions in passing (and clearly their thick as mince readers missed) is that both of these are repeat offenders.
In each of the two cases, the vulnerable women in question had repeatedly been discovered by officers in a similar part of the M602.
Yet rather than that being taken as a sign of the severity of their mental health crises, they were prosecuted.
People serious about killing themselves just do it. People whose 'mental health issues' manifest as attention-seeking don't. And these people need to realise there are consequences.

Hurrah For Science!

About 350,000 tonnes are caught every year and served in restaurants from Spain to Chile and from Mexico to Australia. But many octopus fisheries are reported to be in decline, and fish farmers have turned to rearing of octopuses to try to replace these dwindling catches. Wild-caught males and females would be allowed to mate, and their fertile eggs would be grown in containers into adults to be sold to markets round the globe.
These efforts have foundered, however, because octopus larvae eat only live food – which has made feeding them difficult and expensive. Keeping young animals in water whose salinity and temperature are carefully controlled has also proved tricky.
Oh, dear, This looks insurmountable.
These drawbacks have prevented octopus farms from making progress – until recently. Aquaculturists have learned that the young of some octopus species are less fussy about the food they eat and have used these species as basic stock for breeding. There have also been advances in controlling the environments in which octopuses will be raised.
As a result, several companies have said they will soon be ready to sell farmed octopuses. The Japanese seafood company Nissui is one has reported hatching octopus eggs in captivity and has predicted it will be selling market-ready octopuses next year.
Hurrah! The appliance of science is wonderful, isn't it?

But wait. There's always a fly in the ointment somewhere:
...the case for octopus farming is weak, according to Jacquet and her co-authors. The main markets for the animals – the US, Europe, Japan and China – are areas where people are already well-fed.
Octopuses are delicacies and do not deserve to be the focus of intensive farming.
What the hell has 'deserving' got to do with it?

Man's ingenuity has - once again - provided the opportunity for a once-scarce resource to go from a delicacy to an affordable food. Just as it did with salmon and oysters. Who could object?
At present, these farms are still at the development stage, said Peter Godfrey-Smith of Sydney University, a contributor to the paper.
“That means campaigners and activists don’t have products or outlets to target. But when universities and research institutions consider supporting these projects – and that is beginning to happen now – it will make sense to object. Why should research money be used to support a project that will inevitably have so many welfare and environmental problems once it is scaled up?”
Ah. Of course. Progressives. Which, these days, is defined as 'people who want mankind to never, ever progress.

Friday, 7 June 2019

Home Furnishings You Didn't Know You Needed...

A group of homeless people who call themselves a ‘family’ have set up camp at a Plymouth park.
Around a dozen homeless people arrived at Millbay Park earlier this week, and we went to meet them. Several tents, a black leather sofa, and even a stop/go sign have been used to make the place feel homely.
A what..?


Oh....

Because After Two Years Have Elapsed, He'll Be Different?

Wanless was banned from keeping animals for two years after pleading guilty to causing alarm or distress to another member of the public and entering an area he was not allowed in.
Because he's clearly no stranger to the court...
Wanless, from Walton, appeared at Staines Magistrates’ Court on 21 May where he was handed a 16-week sentence, suspended for two years.
He was also ordered to carry out 180 hours of unpaid work over the next 12 months and forced to pay victim surcharge of £115 and costs of £85.
From his well-paying job, perhaps?

Thursday, 6 June 2019

Clearly, Not Concerned Enough To Do His Job....

Stephen Harris, defending, said his client was “shocked and embarrassed by his behaviour” and “apologetic”.
He said Jupp has struggled with anxiety and depression, and had lost his medication which did not help with his erratic behaviour.
Mr Harris asked magistrates to impose unpaid work and a community order for the offences.
What, seriously? You've got to be kidding!
Magistrate Chris Bell said he was concerned by Jupp’s previous attacks on police officers.
Well, of course! So you sentenced him to a long sp...

Oh, Of course not.
He ordered Jupp to complete 200 hours of unpaid work and 25 rehabilitation sessions.
Jupp must also pay £90 compensation to Mr Newman and £200 to Sussex Police.
He must also pay a £190 fine and £200 court costs, which will be added to the £725 he already owes the court.
Who thinks the court and these people will ever see a single penny?

Anyone? Bueller?

Third World Borough, Third Rate Council...

The review into a restaurant that repeatedly hired illegal workers has been delayed...
Oh..?
...because of the possibility of it having traded for years without a licence.
/facepalm
Police asked Kingston Council to revoke the licence that allows Lal Akash in New Malden to sell alcohol and serve food until late at night, after they visited three times with immigration officials in the last five years.
On each occasion, the first in 2015 and the most recent in February this year, they found staff without legal permission to work in the UK – a total of five across the three visits.
Home Office records show that some of the workers were being paid cash in hand, and were living upstairs in return for a few hours of work several days a week.
At least one of them, at the most recent visit, was in the country illegally.
Only one!?
The High Street restaurant owner, Jomirul Hoque, went to the Guildhall on May 1 for councillors to decide whether or not to revoke his licence.
But the meeting had to be postponed because Mr Hoque might not in fact be the licence holder for Lal Akash – the council cannot find any record of his application form.
He bought the business in 2001, and his name appears on a licence in 2007, but council staff could not work out whether proper procedures had been followed.
That's the highly trained and businesslike local public services we've come to expect!
The meeting was adjourned for two weeks while staff search their files – there were a lot of changes to the rules and the way the council kept its records in the mid-1990s – and they promised a full audit of all licences from this period, to ensure the confusion does not happen again.
Yes, they are always going to be 'learning those lessons', aren't they?

Wednesday, 5 June 2019

"No! We Don't Want Responsibility!"

More than 120 schools today back a pledge to ban ‘corrosive’ mobile phones.
In an open letter, dozens of headteachers say every school should implement a ‘phone-free’ policy to end the ‘disruptive’ influence of the devices.
Well, what's stopping them? If they want to, they can.
The letter, organised by the think-tank Onward, has been signed by 30 school executives and heads who run some of the best-performing schools in England – including academies ranked in the country’s top ten.
See? Just follow the example set by these schools.

Or...don't. It is, after all, their choice.
In a challenge to other schools, the headteachers argue that phones can be ‘corrosive to otherwise calm and structured learning environments’.
They say: ‘A firm policy against their use is the best way for schools to maintain order in the face of the disruption that mobile phones can cause.’
Maybe those other schools feel their time and money is best spent on other approaches? I repeat: it's their choice.
Education Secretary Damian Hinds has backed a ban but stopped short of bringing in nationwide rules, insisting that headteachers must decide their own policies.
Quite right.

What's the matter, people - aren't you supposed to teach responsibility and judgement, rather than slavish acquiescence to rules?

"Respect Ma Authoriteh!"

Police are investigating claims school pupils...
Stole from local shops? Dealt drugs in the playground? Planned a school massacre?
...set up a malicious social media account to harass their teachers.
*blinks*
“Some posts suggested inappropriate behaviour from teachers, while others were poking fun at the authoritative nature of others.
“The school has taken the view that this is a personal attack on the school and its staff.
“The school has contacted safeguarding authorities and union representatives to determine a course of action.
“The school was advised to contact the police and pursue the creators for hate crimes.
“These so-called memes, for a lot of young people, are like the equivalent to newspaper comic strips which are notorious for spitting in the face of authority.
Hey, maybe the kids are alright after all! Such unbelievable pomposity needs pricking!
Anyone with information should call police on 101.
King Edmund School declined the chance to comment.
Heh! I'll just bet they did...

Tuesday, 4 June 2019

Facepalm Moment....

Diverse authors and storylines are not just necessary for ethnic minorities to relate to: they also discourage stereotypes in society of these marginalised groups.
Do they really? Let's see...
Last month, sociological researcher and Soas teaching fellow, Emma Dabiri, released her debut book Don’t Touch My Hair with Penguin.
In this pioneering work, the Irish-Nigerian speaks not only of her experience with her natural hair and wearing it out in Ireland, but also the intricate history of black hair.
Ah. Next up: 'Watermelons And Fried Chicken: My Story'.

'Animalistic', Eh...?


The best friend of a pregnant woman who was allegedly stamped on by a group of students during a horrific attack says she is disgusted that the case has been closed by police.
Harris Girls’ Academy Bromley apologised yesterday after the woman accused students of repeatedly stamping on her after she intervened to stop a young girl from being bullied.
The victim, 19, who is three months pregnant, was left fearing for her baby’s life after the attack outside Penge Sainsbury’s on May 13 at around 5pm.
Hmmm. Doesn't sound like the behaviour you'd expect from their publicity material:


The school is also an Ofsted 'success story:
Harris Girls’ Academy Bromley received a glowing “outstanding” rating following an inspection visit last November.
So how to square this circle? And how can the case be closed by police?
A police spokesman has told News Shopper that the case is now closed. This is despite a 13-year-old girl being arrested.
The statement read: "Police were called at 16:55hrs on Monday, 13 May to reports of a fight on High Street in Penge.
"Officers attended. A 19-year-old woman is reported to have been assaulted by a group of teenage girls when she intervened upon seeing them surrounding another teenager.
"A 13-year-old girl was arrested on suspicion of assault and taken to a south London police station.
"The victim was conveyed to hospital where she received treatment for minor injuries before being discharged.
"The case has since been closed due to a lack of evidence."
There's no CCTV? Really? In Penge High Street?

Monday, 3 June 2019

And When You Still Don't Get The Viewers?

David Baddiel and Frank Skinner’s football song Three Lions has been rewritten as a feminist anthem to cheer on England’s women team in next month’s World Cup.
It'll take more than that to make it popular...
The theme of the reworked tune swaps low expectations about the England men’s team with sexist attitudes about women’s football in general.
The lines “That England’s going to throw it away, gonna blow it away” are replaced with “That we don’t have the skill in their eyes. Well we’re tired of the lies”.
And “All those ‘well done girls’” replaces “oh-so-nears” as the source of wearing down England supporters.
It's the supporters you need onside. Preaching at them isn't going to do it, even if it's set to a catchy beat.

Fancy That, A School That Demands High Standards!

Parents have reacted to the news that a previously outstanding school has been branded inadequate after inspectors raised serious concerns over pupil safety.
The King John School, in Thundersley, was criticised by Ofsted inspectors for not keeping the most vulnerable pupils safe or following the legal rules designed to protect them.
Hmmm, what's the problem, exactly?
Details of exactly how the school and the Zenith Multi Academy Trust which runs it, failed to protect vulnerable children were requested by the Echo, but both refused to respond.
A mystery! But wait...
Lisa Read said: "Bullying is not ‘rare’. The school need to open their eyes on all matters.
"It’s not just about achieving above average.
"The school is far too channelled into the academic results and ignore children’s wellbeing and safety."
Wait, isn't that exactly what a school should be concerning itself with?
Mary Wheeler added: "It’s a great school. They just seem to be failing those with more complex social needs.
"Safeguarding is deemed inadequate as kids haven’t been educated enough on county lines, drug dealings and gangs. This will be rectified sharpish I can assure you."
Ah. Silly me. It's not. They should be more concerned with pushing whatever agenda takes the fancy of the DoE on any given day.
Ofsted inspectors acknowledged that the quality of teaching is high, and outcomes for pupils are good, particularly at the sixth form, while the curriculum was also praised.
Seems as if this school is doing exactly what it should be praised for, not condemned.

Saturday, 1 June 2019

You Might As Well Give In, You've Already Lost...

Sarah Hewitt-Clarkson is crying. The headteacher at Anderton Park primary school in Birmingham has suffered eight weeks of protests outside her school gates over her decision to teach LGBT-inclusive content to her young pupils, the vast majority of whom are Muslim.
After repeatedly putting on a brave face when I ask her how she is feeling, she finally admits: “I am in despair”, and then breaks down. She is struggling for control as she continues:
“I know one of the phrases that’s associated with domestic abuse is the crushing of the spirit of a woman. And that’s what I feel is happening. We can’t give in.
Really? You're a woman of your convictions, then? Pity the same can't be said about your backers...
The local Labour MP, Roger Godsiff, says that...“It was wrong of the government to give headteachers the power to decide what LGBT content to teach children at different ages, he says.
“I think that the government guidance should have been more prescriptive as to when the different elements of the Equality Act were appropriate, in the government’s opinion, to be taught to children. Governments are elected, people have recourse to hold their politicians to account. Headteachers have had this burden put on them, and in some cases are going to end up in the situation Anderton Park is in.”
He blames the academies system. “If schools were still maintained by local councils, in a situation like this Birmingham council could have put down a programme about how the elected representatives of the council believe the protected characteristics of the Equality Act should be taught. And then headteachers could have said: ‘we’re doing what we’ve been told to do.’”
There speaks someone who has no courage, no convictions. "Big boys did it and ran away" "We were only obeying orders!"

What about fellow MP Jess Phillips?
“People have been too scared to stand up to this protest, including the Department for Education,” says Phillips.
...
She is deeply concerned that the protests will spread to other schools and bring in other faiths. “If we allow the protests at Anderton Park Road to change the way we teach in British schools and create a two-tier teaching system, where kids in white neighbourhoods can have all the equalities and kids in Asian neighbourhoods have to have things kept in the dark, they win.”
"We can't let this happen, or we'll lost control, and that will never do!"

But back to Hewitt-Clarkson:
The government is shifting the responsibility for LGBT content – including the highly sensitive question of whether any LGBT content is “age appropriate” for primary school pupils – from politicians on to the shoulders of individual headteachers, she says.
“I’ve had eight weeks of protests as a result. It’s just unforgivable.”
While she is trying to deal with the protests and run a school, policymakers are “sitting in their offices in Whitehall looking at the Thames”: “They’re not working out how we’re going to sort out our deficit budget, our Sats results, all that stuff I’m doing in my job as headteacher. It’s not OK to write policies in Whitehall that affect me in Birmingham so badly.
When they write policies you agree with, I bet you're all for it.

That's why these protests are a warning sign. It's because you're weak. And they know it.

What Don't You Understand, Alan..?

Alan suspects they used a hi-tech gadget to clone his keyless signal as there was no broken glass at the scene. The thieves also made off with his iPod and £,1000 worth of golf clubs.
The 68-year-old added: “I’ve been left completely frustrated because I can’t walk very far due to health reasons and I need a car.”
Help me out here, readers! Doesn't golf entail some walking...?
“I’m having to pay just over £2,000 with my excess and replacing everything in the car all because my car was stolen and that’s what annoys me because it’s through no fault of my own.
The police haven’t shown much interest, but I’m sure if £23,000 was stolen from a bank they would soon be quick to investigate. I don’t understand it.”
Yes, Alan, they are terrible aren't they, those Essex Police?

Say, what did you do before you retired?
Alan Jones, a former Essex Police officer...
*blinks*

Friday, 31 May 2019

Tweet Of The Month

An idiot is schooled:


And we really shouldn't stick the boot into May becau... aw, go on then!


Post Title Of The Month

I might as well make this 'Tim Newman Title Of The Month' at this rate...


Quote Of The Month

Tim Newman on a new cause of death:
"There was a time when Boeing would have known what systems and processes to put in place to ensure a plane is airworthy, and they’d have employed people with the knowledge, skills, and character to implement them. In parallel, the FAA would have employed competent, experienced people who could be trusted to sign off on an aircraft only if it was safe. But Boeing’s priorities changed along with those of the FAA, reordered to place social justice, inclusion, and diversity at the top as they proceed with their mission to remake the world according to their ideology. And now we have planes dropping out of the sky and killing hundreds of people in accidents due to colossal organisational failings from outfits that are preaching to us about morality."
And Longrider on the predictable 'Guardian' response to Milkshake Wars:
"Either Chakrabortty is being highly disingenuous or he carries his own event horizon around with him. It is perfectly clear that Farage was engaging in rhetoric and metaphor. Being a journalist, I presume you have studied the English language and know what a metaphor is, you amoral piece of shit. It was not intended to be an actual call to violence and you would have to be unbelievably thick to think that it was. But never mind, this, apparently, has the same equivalence as attacking political candidates on the hustings and makes it okay. Moron. I also notice the poisoning the well fallacy being wheeled out. Why is it that modern journalists are incapable of presenting logically sound arguments? Why are they so utterly thick? I also notice that he is trying to claim that objection to violence is somehow being a member of the offenderati. Idiot. No, it isn’t. The offenderati, the professionally outraged, are those who complain about wrongthink or use unapproved words. Objecting to actual assault is not being professionally offended, it is the normal response of a moral person."

Post Of The Month

Dumbjon on the modern Tory party and its ability to unerringly snatch defeat from the jaws of victory...

Why Not Show Contempt, When The Justice System Is So Contemptible?

A recording of the incident was played in court yesterday in which Rayson, after he was remanded in custody, began shouting 'come here' repeatedly, referring to the Judge as 'big man'.
He then called out 'I will punch your f***ing face in you d***head'.
Not a very sensible thing to do?
In mitigation his defence barrister Jane Brady said that her client was sorry for what he had done and being placed into custody was a 'tipping point' which led to his outburst.
That outburst got him an extra month in jail.

But....why was he so upset? It's not like he's any stranger to jail, after all?
The court heard Rayson, a father-of-one, has 22 convictions for crimes including assault, drugs crimes, and public order offences.
But Anthony McGeorge, defending, said his client was keen to “change his ways”. He said: “He is a young man, who in my submission, needs help.”
Rayson also asked for eight other crimes to be taken into consideration – four thefts, three burglaries, and a taking of a car without the owner’s consent.
I guess he didn't change his ways after all, Anthony. Still, you got paid, and you probably don't live anywhere near him, so it's all good, eh?

Thursday, 30 May 2019

The Ratchet Only Turns One Way...

Laws covering so-called revenge porn are not fit for purpose and police still need more training, experts say.
The 'experts' in question being the usual suspects, of course.
Victims should receive anonymity and laws need to include threats to share images, according to Sophie Mortimer from the Revenge Porn helpline.
Yes, it's 'activists get what they want then push for redefinition to prove they were right all along' again.
Figures from 19 forces in England and Wales revealed police investigations have doubled in the last four years but the number of charges has fallen.
Because the CPS knows full well that most of these cases aren't going to win over a jury?
In October 2016, Alice Ruggles, 24, was murdered by a former boyfriend who cut her throat after breaking into her home in Gateshead.
After her death it emerged that her killer, Trimaan Dhillon, had threatened to share intimate images of her online as part of a campaign of stalking and harassment.
Alice's mother, Dr Sue Hills, said threatening to share images should be made part of the law. She said her daughter may have sought help sooner if Dhillon had not held the threat over her.
And she may not have needed to 'seek help' if you'd raised her with more self-respect than to take and share these sort of images in the first place.

Here, Jeremy, You Might Need This...

Inspector Jeremy Bartley, of North Yorkshire Police's Roads Policing Group, said: "This was a road traffic collision that led to the tragic loss of two innocent lives, for which Samuel Balaam has admitted responsibility. This incident reinforces the need for drivers to provide their undivided attention and care when driving any vehicle at any time - treat it and those around you with respect.
"I would like to thank the families of the victims, who have had to endure a lengthy investigation in order to receive some solace, with the person responsible ultimately being brought to justice."
Really? Care to leaf through this book, chum?


Here, I'll turn the page for you:


North Yorkshire Police said Samuel Balaam had been sentenced by York Magistrates to 20 weeks in custody, suspended for 12 months.
I'm pretty sure no-one considers that 'justice' as defined in the OED.

Wednesday, 29 May 2019

Don't They Have The Dangerous Dogs Act In Norn Iron Then...?

Police said the incident was reported to them and the matter passed to the council's dog warden for investigation.
Belfast City Council confirmed it was investigating.
Wait, what? This could have been fatal!
Doctors told the family one injury was just 2cms from piercing the girl's heart.
She is to meet with doctors at the end of the week for possible nerve damage to her shoulder.
Why the hell aren't the cops investigating, instead of some council pen-pusher?
“I feel disgusted that the dog was off the lead, especially a dog like that, with kids playing,” grandmother Anne-Marie O’Dwyer said.
She said her granddaughter has suffered nightmares since the attack.
“She just keeps saying ‘Why did the dog jump me?' She just doesn’t understand. She didn’t go near the dog. The dog went to her.
“She could be dead, without a doubt."
Doesn't the PSNI operate to the same Dangerous Dogs legislation as the mainland?

Something Missing In This 'Independent' Headline...


...what could it possibly be?

Oh. Yeah. The words 'convicted murderer' should be in there, surely?
Phoenix was cleared of causing death by dangerous driving but had previously admitted the lesser offence of causing death by careless driving.
As he was sentenced at Bournemouth Crown Court, Jaiden’s father stormed out, shouting: “Is that it? You got a year for killing my son?”
He got life for killing his wife, and didn't serve it. I wonder how much of this 'year' he'll actually serve?
The Crown Prosecution Service has confirmed that Phoenix was sentenced to life imprisonment in 2004 for the murder of his wife.
It is not clear when he was released on licence but he was recalled to prison following Jaiden’s death.
For how long?

Tuesday, 28 May 2019

Why Invent New Excuses When The Old Ones Work So Well?

Sedat Menekse, 29, from Canvey, says he is worried sick trying to find out where his beloved pet is - and claims police have refused to tell him where his dog is being kept and what will happen to her.
Well, yes. Because it's not for them to decide, but for magistrates.

Pity they didn't just shoot the thing then and there.
He told the Echo: “Everyone that knows Ella knows what happened is totally out of character for her and it was all exaggerated as she is not dangerous.
Ella must have been provoked or got scared after she escaped as she would never do this.”
Sure, the lady's tiny dog threatened this hulking monster so much she mauled it half to death in 'self-defence'. Gosh. Never heard that one before.
“I have lived on this island five years and have never caused any problems - I thought I was part of this community.”
What's that got to do with it? Thinking of playing the RacismCard™, are we?
“I have spoken to the lady whose dog Ella bit and we hugged and I told her how sorry I am and even offered to pay the vet bill – she’s a lovely lady.”
You 'offered'..? So, you haven't actually done so?
“I can’t eat over this, it’s stressing me out so much - I’m not a bad guy that everyone is making me out to be.”
Ah, 'it's me mental elf, your worship'...
“I am not being told anything. I will make sure she never escapes again, I will get padlocks and cameras.”
If you need padlocks and cameras to keep a 'family pet', it's not really suitable to be one. Is it?

"I've Got A Cunning Plan..."

New Tory council leader, Tony Cox, announced the proposal as part of a ten-point plan for the town.
The scheme, which other councils have also looked at, works by taking a swab from a dog to add its DNA to a register, which can then be matched with a sample of dog dirt.
Mr Cox announced the move to explore the initiative last night as part of a plan to invest in the borough.
Oh dear.

Still, Baldri- I mean, Tony, just because it hasn't worked anywhere else, eh?

Though most of the poop in Southend High Street is likely to be human.

Monday, 27 May 2019

I Hope Those 23 Weeks Feel Like 23 Years....

...and if the other prisoners get their hands on you, that's a given:
Callum Gerken, 27, of Wood Farm, Oxford, appeared in Oxford Magistrates' Court earlier to face a trial for attacking Shadow, a 17-week-old labrador he was meant to be looking after.
Gerken, who had previously denied the charge, had a last-minute change of heart and admitted causing the dog unnecessary suffering and a separate charge of sending a threatening message over WhatsApp.
I expect the 'change of heart' is more 'advised about reality by solicitor' as there's no evidence this thing has one.
Gerken was in a house in Saunders Road, East Oxford, on April 3, when he got angry at the puppy for defecating inside and ruining items in the house by tearing them up. He started repeatedly hitting her with a slipper.
Later, when she was struggling to breathe as a result of his actions, he refused to get her medical help.
The court heard how Gerken had sent an angry voice message over Whatsapp to the puppy's owner in which he said the puppy had 'sh*t everywhere'.
The message continued: "I have just beat her from one side of the room to the other. "I don't give a f**k. That is how it will be with me. She ain't gonna do that again because she cannot f**king walk."
He was also initially charged with assaulting a woman, the puppy's owner who'd clearly had the lack of sense to hook up with this walking piece of excrement, but the charges were inexplicably dropped.
Gerken's solicitor, Richard Davies, told the court his client felt shame and remorse for what he had done and that the act was completely out of character.
He should be done for perjury too! He's always been scum, as we can see from this news item in 2008:
Callum Gerken, 16, and Jake Gerken, 14, from Forest Hill, have been given two-year antisocial behaviour orders (Asbo) banning them from entering Risinghurst.
They are also banned from using threatening behaviour or violence, or intimidating, abusing or swearing at any member of the public in England and Wales.
The hearing at Oxford Magistrates' Court on Monday also imposed an order on the brothers' parents to control their children's behaviour.
Clearly, they didn't rise to the challenge.
Magistrates sentenced him to serve 23 weeks in prison, and he must pay £250 compensation and £1,000 court costs.
He'll probably have to spend those weeks in solitary, which is a pity, as it means no-one will be able to beat him from one side of the cell to another.

I'll Just Leave This Here, Shall I?





No further comment required...

Saturday, 25 May 2019

This Is Why We Have A Dangerous Dog Problem...

Sarah Dean’s American Bulldog, Carlo, attacked the child who was playing football outside his block of flats, in Kingsdown, on August 17 last year.
The single mum-of-two (Ed: It always is, isn't it?) had previously received letters from her housing association urging her to keep Carlo on a lead, following complaints from neighbours.
The boy, who has suffered severe physical and psychological damage, now struggles with behavioural problems including biting people.
Bang to rights, surely?
In her police interviews Dean, 43, blamed the five-year-old for what happened and denied the dog had attacked him, even when shown graphic images of the injuries.
Her brief soon got her to see sense.
Dean later pleaded guilty to being in charge of a dog dangerously out of control, causing injury.
She sobbed as Judge William Hart sentenced her at Bristol Crown Court on Wednesday (April 24) to a 12-month jail term...
Excellent! At last, a proper...

Oh.
...suspended for two years.
/facepalm
Nikki Coombe, mitigating, said Dean had “considerable remorse”, adding: “She was very upset when looking at the photographs of the child.”
Judge Hart replied: “Her initial response did her no credit.”
Good comeback. But neither does your leniency, judge, does it?
The prosecution has applied for the dog, which is in police custody, to be put down.
Dean opposes this and does not believe her dog is a danger to the public.
It doesn't really matter what she believes, does it?
The prosecution made an application for Dean to pay compensation to the family due to the boy’s serious psychological issues and his injuries.
Judge Hart said this was “not realistic” given the defendant’s limited means. She must complete 10 days of rehabilitation and adhere to a 16-week night curfew.
Her high dose of antidepressants made her unfit for unpaid work.
So we - the taxpayer - go on shelling out for a dangerous animal to be kept in kennels, and the other useless bitch to be kept in social housing?

Taking Us For Mugs Pt 793258715893569741

A mum has spoken out about her struggles living on Universal Credit.
Wait, haven't I heard this before?
The Whitehawk resident, who wished to remain anonymous, was forced to apply for benefits after leaving a relationship, leaving her and her son to stick it out by themselves.
Ah. Different location, far away from Bucko's patch. But pretty much the same whinge.

And she wasn't 'forced to apply for benefits' at all. She appears to have been living on benefits for the last 20 years!
“My last job was 20 years ago, and though I want to work and I’m trying to work, I just can’t get hired.
“It’s looking for someone who will give you that chance.
She doesn't say what she's qualified in, or what she's applying for, but I suspect it's something that she knows full well she'll never get...
Universal Credit was introduced by the Government last year to supposedly simplify the benefits system, combining all benefits into one monthly payment tailor-made to the claimant’s needs.
But the anonymous mum said the payment is not enough and is starting to affect her mental health.
*rolls eyes*
“I hear people like us being referenced as being “below the poverty line” but they have no ideas what this means. They have no experience of it.
“I remember at Christmas last year when I realised I couldn’t buy my son anything as a present, not even a tiny gift, because we didn’t have enough.
“It was his first Christmas with me for a while and I couldn’t get him anything.”
Lots of working parents have the same experience, because they are taxed to the hilt to support people like this.
The mum has also been heavily affected by another much-criticised Government policy: bedroom tax, which taxes homeowners for each bedroom they do not use.
It doesn't 'tax homeowners' at all. I'm one. I'm not taxed.
She said: “I haven’t been able to move out of my three-bedroom house since our split.
“It’s a house we don’t need or want, but I can’t get out because the council only allows me to bid on specific properties.”
Translation: "I won't move out of the area or take a property that isn't 100% perfectly designed for my wants."
“Some days you just don’t want to get out of bed, but you have to keep going. Poverty is an easy hole to fall into, but it’s hard to get out.”
Doesn't sound much like you 'fell in'. Sounds like you've never bothered to climb out.

Friday, 24 May 2019

Someone Certainly 'Displays A Blatant Disregard For The Safety Of Others'...

Rob Hall, prosecuting, told how Martin was seen by police driving a Ford Kuga, which had cloned number plates, in the Bolton town centre area just before 10pm on March 20.
The vehicle had been stolen in a burglary at a home in Mersey Road, Sale on March 7.
"When officers put on their emergency lights and two tone horns this defendant's response was to drive away from them at speed and in a dangerous manner," said Mr Hall.
"The defendant drives on the wrong side of the road, overtakes in front of oncoming vehicles, travels at a speed up to 96mph in a 30mph limit and then drives through red lights, avoiding vehicles that were using that crossing at the time.
"He then performs a u-turn while being pursued by the police, his car swerves through other vehicles on the road and then, again, goes onto the wrong side of the road travelling at 90mph in a residential area.
"Such was the behaviour of the defendant and his driving that the police helicopter, in effect, called off the pursuit because of the potential danger to other road users.
"It is quite clear the defendant showed a blatant disregard for the safety of others."
...and it's not just the defendant, but the bewigged moron in the judge's seat:
Sentencing Martin to a community order for two years, Judge Timothy Stead said: "Usually, in this court, those who take flight from police when lights are flashing and drive dangerously through the suburbs go straight to prison. That's a near guarantee if anybody is injured or there is serious damage to property.
"Quite astonishingly, on Halliwell Road, that didn't happen. It really is amazing."
I think the word you were looking for was 'fortuitous'...
Martin was ordered to undertake 150 hours of unpaid work, participate in 25 days of rehabilitation activities and was banned from driving for two years.
The judge told him: "I do hope, if only for the sake of your family, that you are sorry and ashamed of what brings you here.
"I don't think you are a bad person at all — you took some very silly decisions and the ultimate one was a dangerous decision.
"I am not going to stigmatise you with a prison sentence."
*grinds teeth*

I suppose it was only to be expected.

Revenge, Best Eaten Cold...



...and washed down with a nice Chianti. Bon appetit, Nigel!

Thursday, 23 May 2019

I Guess Crime Does Pay, If You're Up Before 'Lenient Leigh'...

CCTV footage showed Skarott, of Burnaby Road, Southend, activating the cards on several occasions and hiding them under the till.
Mr Thompson contacted the police, who then attended Skarott’s home. Cyrus Shroff, prosecuting, told the court:
“Police attended the defendant’s home address and found three bags of scratch cards, along with more than £3,000 in cash, and he was arrested.
“Mr Thompson has said that the total amount that his actions have cost the store is £20,980, due to him having to pay Camelot the value of the cards, and has had to take out loans and use his own funds to keep the store up and running.”
Bang to rights! A case even Essex Police couldn't fail to solve!
Barry Kogan, mitigating for Skarott, said his client has been a long time sufferer of depression and regretted his actions.
Mr Kogan said: “The defendant is deeply ashamed of himself and bitterly regrets what he did. He has apologised to Mr Thompson for letting him down so badly when he put his trust in him.
“The defendant can offer a repayment of £8,700 on this day, and is keen to make amends for his actions.
“He is a father of three children, all under six-years-old, who he looks after regularly, and it’s my case that he be granted a suspended sentence so he can maintain that relationship and continue working to pay back the money he took.”
Who do you think is going to employ him, then?
Judge Samantha Leigh (Ed: *winces*) handed Skarott a 12-month suspended prison sentence, along with 200 hours of unpaid work yesterday at Basildon Crown Court.
Addressing Skarott, she said: “It is my view that the most appropriate sentence is for you to remain out of prison so that you can continue working in order to repay back at least some of the funds taken from Mr Thompson, to ensure his business can be kept going.”
Are you going to employ him as Clerk of Court then, Samantha? Or maybe do some odd jobs around the house?

Police (Dog) Brutality

The attack happened following a police pursuit of a suspect through the Wandsworth area on Friday, April 12, which was reported by the Wandsworth Times on that date.
The pursuit resulted in the arrest of a 21-year-old man known as "Suspect A" on a number of offences including burglary, possession with intent to supply class A drugs and dangerous driving.
In the wake of the pursuit, the Wandsworth Times received reports that a bystander tending his nearby allotment had been attacked by a dog from a Metropolitan Police Dog Unit dispatched to search the vicinity.
This seems to happen all too frequently. Didn't the police handlers once get feted as the cream of the crop?

Hopefully there'll be CCTV to prevent the police from claiming the allotment-holder threatened them with a dibber.
Responding to a request for comment, a Met Police spokesperson confirmed that a police dog from the force had attacked a resident in the area on April 12.
The Met Police spokesperson said: "After arresting Suspect A, the Met’s Police Dog Unit carried out a search of the area as part of enquiries into the investigation.
"During this search, a police dog bit a member of the public on the leg in Steerforth Street, SW18."
The local reporters have the scent, and aren't going to give up:
The Met Police statement provided further details of the dog attack, highlighting how the victim was in his 80s and had been taken to hospital by the London Ambulance Service (LAS) with "possibly life-changing" injuries as a result of the dog's attack.
The last pensioner that a police dog attacked died. The coroner went to town on them. I guess more of those 'lessons that won't actually be learned', eh?

Wednesday, 22 May 2019

Well, You've Actually Done It, Chuka!

A cross-party Parliamentary panel on social integration (APPG)...is chaired by Change UK MP Chuka Umunna.
Gosh! What amazing ideas is it - formed to 'bring together people from different generations' - going to come up with, with this intellectual powerhouse at the helm?
Supermarkets are being urged to introduce a new 1p charge to use self-service machines...
The panel... claims £30million could be raised by the scheme to help fund community projects.
The report is called 'Heal the Generational Divide', apparently. Hmm...
The report suggests divisions exist between older and younger people, particularly around Brexit, with research claiming that both the younger and older generations would be happy for the other to suffer if it meant getting their own way.
It also proposed schemes including a 'Take Your Headphones Off Day', tax breaks for care home volunteers and a national post-retirement volunteering scheme to bring together more people of different ages.
It is unclear whether or not Change UK will adopt the proposals as official policy...
Hmm, well. Let''s see what people think.
The corner shop worker, who lives in Dartford, Kent, said: 'On the face of it then it doesn't sound a bad idea. Nobody is going to say they don't want to help the elderly –it's a win-win.
'But I don't think it will go down well with the younger generations. And the idea that could bring people together to help solve Brexit is just ludicrous.
'I don't think that could be done by anybody if I'm honest. I'm not sure charging people for doing something that has become such an ordinary part of everyday life will work.'
Mick Potter, 72, said it was a 'crazy idea' to think it could help bring people together over Brexit.
The pensioner, of Eltham, said: 'The young ones won't like it at all. If you see young people in this day and age they wouldn't give up a seat for an elderly person or help us out – so I don't think they'd support this.
'The idea it could help Brexit as well and bring people together is a farce. We have become the laughing stock of the world.
'I'm not sure I want to vote at the European elections because of what a joke it all is. The idea that charging people to use a self-service checkout is funding projects which in turn brings young and old together over Brexit is madness.
'Nobody can do that. I think the divide is too wide. We had the vote and that's it. People say well it's the younger people that will be the next generation but the vote was carried out three years ago.
'Some people find those machines confusing enough without people having to pay to use them. How would that work? '
People are taxed enough. 'What if the supermarkets wanted to take a cut?'
Luke Pollard, 25, of Gravesend, Kent, was also using the Eltham Sainsbury's and was not impressed with the idea. The student said: 'Isn't that why people pay the government taxes?
'I don't see how that's right. I know it's only 1p but it's more the principle behind it and the logic. Why should Parliament be getting people to pay more all the time?'
Full-time mother Cheryl Toon, 35, said she did not see how the proposals would work. Cheryl, of Dartford, Kent, said: 'I know it's not a lot of money but I don't think it's a good idea. 'It seems like a supermarket tax. I can't imagine the supermarket companies are happy about it.
'Isn't there more important things to be thinking about? Why isn't more focus being put it on actually sorting out Brexit? Rather than charging people because it's not been sorted.
'It's going to be normal members of the public paying for this and it's not normal members of the public who have made a complete mess out of Brexit – it's the politicians.'
Well done, Chuka! You've actually brought the generations together after all!

They are united. In thinking you're a useless waste of oxygen, just like all the rest of the shower of shits in Parliament...