"If you tell the truth, you don't have to remember anything."

A pity he didn't major in American Literatute, he might have come across Mark Twain's wise words.

In 2023, the then 37-year-old sociologist became the youngest ever black professor at Cambridge.In a statement posted by the Good Law Project on Wednesday, Arday said that being appointed professor had been "without question, the greatest professional privilege of my life".

One it now looks like you didn't deserve and only got for one reason.

Jovan Owusu-Nepaul, who describes himself as an associate of Arday, told BBC Newsnight on Wednesday that he found "the whole thing regrettable". "From, I think, how he's been treated and the quite obtuse spotlight on him about his CV - career - at Cambridge University," he said. "I think it's also regrettable that there may be some untruths that have come out about his CV."

On Saturday, Arday told the Times in an interview that he was accountable for those mistakes, but that "what I am not is a liar".

Sounds like something a liar woud say... 

He told the newspaper: "There has been, since I arrived at Cambridge, a very well orchestrated and co-ordinated campaign to unseat me from my position." He suggested that this was "racially motivated" and that he had become a "lightning rod" for criticism of diversity, equity and inclusion (DEI) policy. 

"Disability card?... That'll do nicely!"

Arday said some errors in his early academic work was because of his autism, as he relied on using mimicry to make sense of information, and that similar scrutiny would find similar errors in work by other academics.

Ah, the appeal to 'everyone does it!'...

"We're talking about academia here. I didn't murder somebody. I think the cruelty that I've experienced and the positioning of me as this kind of liar and fantasist is totally unacceptable," he told the newspaper.

Most of us think the elevation of a liar and fantasist to this position purely to tick a box is what's 'unacceptable' .

Down These Mean Cyberstreets, A Man Must Go....

Professor Clare McGlynn, a law expert at Durham University, branded the metaverse a 'ticking time bomb' and warned that the number of sex attacks is set to 'explode' in the next few years.

Eh? Playing computer games is causing sexual assaults and rapes? 

Apparently so, Reader, but not real ones.  

Her paper, published in the Oxford Journal of Legal Studies, found that a rising toll of 'meta-rapes' are going unpunished in the unregulated digital spaces. It cites a police investigation after a teenager was 'gang-raped', with officers concluding that she suffered the same psychological trauma as a real-life victim.

Ah, yes, I thought it sounded familiar.  We've never heard the outcome of that case, have we?

Professor McGlynn's study, with Carlotta Rigotti of Leiden University in the Netherlands, proposes that existing laws should be applied to 'appropriate cases of meta-rape'.

Female wacademics, what would we do without them.... 

That Hate Crime and Public Order (Scotland) Act Is Going Well, Then...

A senior academic has been reported to police after allegedly making ­sectarian comments at an anti-racism rally.

Oh. 

Jeanette Findlay, an economics professor at Glasgow University, spoke at the event in Glasgow on Saturday. She is chairman and founding member of Call it Out, a campaign against anti-Irish racism and anti-Catholic bigotry.

And her chosen method is....Protestant bigotry!  

In a recording of her speech to protesters, shared on social media platform X, Professor Findlay said members of the Orange Order were at the event. She said they ‘swim in the same dirty water as the racists who are in Luton or London’ and claimed ‘anti-fascist’ protesters had been ‘kettled’ by ‘political police’ at the event. Professor Findlay said: ‘When you say you won’t allow the Right on your streets, can I remind you that the Right march our streets every week 11 months of the year – and in particular in July, when they take over the whole city from the first hour of the morning to the last hour at night. You need to stand with us and our community and protect our churches, our places of ­worship, when those b******* are going past us.’

Protect them from people marching past, not actually doing anything other than existing? What a snowflake.

The professor is also seen in another video shared on X ­asking a police officer who is telling her to move on: ‘Are you moving the Huns?’

Well, I'm learning new epithets for religious bigotry, not sure of the derivation of that one...  

A Police Scotland spokesman said: ‘A complaint has been received and is being assessed.’

As you have to do now.  

A statement online said the Grand Lodge had ‘written to the Scottish Government, police and other organisations expressing our concern over Professor Findlay’s speech and seeking action’. Todd Ferguson, a Tory councillor in North Ayrshire, tweeted: ‘The speech is at odds with the Scottish Government’s Hate Crime and Public Order (Scotland) Act 2021.’

Easy to see why crime is becoming rife in Scotland, if the police are tied up with this nonsense all the time... 

No Good Deed Goes Unpunished...

Country singer Dolly Parton has been branded as 'racist, sexist and homophobic' after she recommended a children's book that a woke academic declared to be pushing 'white western values'.

The artist and philanthropist offered the book, Llama Llama Red Pajama, as part of the library of free titles her club periodically mails out to children up to the age of five in an effort to promote literacy.

Given that 'white western values' are clearly dominant in successful countries, why wouldn't they be pushed? What does this idiot think should be pushed instead?  

Jennifer K. Stone's Ph.D. dissertation, titled 'Reading Power With and Through Dolly Parton's Imagination Library (DPIL): A Critical Content Analysis,' asserts that the book selections in the program conform to dominant white western values.

Stone's analysis of the children's book claims that characters with disabilities, LGBTQ+ couples, and non-normative gender identities are erased.

Ah, the same woke nonsense they can get from school and TV. I don't think they're missing out somehow...  

She also critiques the portrayal of values such as individualism, work, single-family homes, physical fitness, and goal-oriented literacy, arguing they privilege a narrow worldview.

One worth acquiring if you want your children to get on in life. Maybe that's the real issue?  

When Matt Fleming of the Orange County Register read the story to his one-year-old daughter he claimed he had 'no idea I was supporting 'white saviorism.''

You aren't.  

Stone's dissertation has sparked controversy, with many parents continuing to support Parton's initiative, which is simply aiming to promote literacy among youngsters.

Another failed acandemic goes down in flames, almost certainly still thinking she's the right one and the parents are wrong...  

Translating 'Guardian' Headlines

"Music reflects modern society"

Senior study author Eva Zangerle, an expert on recommendation systems at Austria’s University of Innsbruck, declined to single out an individual newer artist for having simple lyrics. But she emphasised that lyrics can be a “mirror of society” which reflect how a culture’s values, emotions and preoccupations change over time.

See? The obvious conclusion.  

For the study in the journal Scientific Reports, the researchers looked at the emotions expressed in lyrics, how many different and complicated words were used, and how often they were repeated. “Across all genres, lyrics had a tendency to become more simple and more repetitive,” Zangerle summarised. The results also confirmed previous research which had shown a decrease in positive, joyful lyrics over time and a rise in those that express anger, disgust or sadness.

There's precious little to be joyful about, so of course, song lyrics will reflect that. Good grief, the ridiculous things people are studying - presumably, for real money - never ceases to amaze me. 

The number of repeated lines rose most in rap over the decades, Zangerle said – adding that it obviously had the most lines to begin with. “Rap music has become more angry than the other genres,” she added.

Gosh. I wonder why a thuggish music genre would have been top of this particular chart. 

Maybe The Correlation Isn’t What You Think It Is…

Restaurants and takeaways with the unhealthiest menus are more likely to be found in deprived areas, while tourists hotspots such as Westminster have the healthiest food outlets, research suggests.

Gosh, whatever could be the reason for this? 

The study from the University of Cambridge examined menus from almost 55,000 food outlets on Just Eat, an online food ordering and delivery platform. Each menu was given a score between 0 and 12, with 12 being the healthiest. To extrapolate the data, the researchers used artificial intelligence to predict the healthiness of almost 180,000 menus across the UK.

Researchers also found that food outlets clustered in more deprived areas, with 8.39 food outlets per 1,000 to 3,000 people in local authorities with the highest levels of deprivation, compared with just 3.85 in the least deprived areas. As a result, people living in the most deprived areas were facing a “double burden” where they had more food outlets but also that they were less healthy.

So, is anyone forcing them at gunpoint into Greasy Ali's Chicken Shack? No?  

Jean Adams, professor of dietary public health at the University of Cambridge, said the study found there were more out-of-home food outlets in more deprived areas, and these tended to be less healthy. “That is the ‘double burden’ we refer to,” said Adams. “Within these neighbourhoods, individuals at lower socioeconomic positions are also at a greater risk of obesity when they are exposed to more outlets, adding a ‘triple burden’.

Only if they eat there, Jean. It's not like they emit some sort of obesity-causing pollution. 

“People in lower socioeconomic groups often live in these more deprived areas, where they are exposed to numerous unhealthy food outlets, and they are more susceptible to the negative impacts of this exposure. These inequalities in the local food environment may have contributed to the health inequalities we see in the UK.”

Maybe, and this is just a suggestion, the outlets were there first, and they are poor because they spend all their money there? 

Oh, Here We Go…

...Tolkein's in the 'racism' spotlight again:

Over the years, Italy’s ultra-conservative prime minister has quoted passages in interviews, shared photos of herself reading the novel and even posed with a statue of the wizard Gandalf as part of a campaign. In her autobiography-slash-manifesto, she dedicates several pages to her “favourite book”, which she refers to at one point as being a “sacred” text. When I read the news this week that Italy’s culture ministry is spending €250,000 to organise a Tolkien show at Rome’s National Gallery of Modern and Contemporary Art, and that Meloni will attend the opening, I couldn’t help wondering: why? What is this government trying to achieve by stamping its mark so aggressively on one of the world’s most loved fantasy sagas?

Maybe just to watch you get your Y-fronts in a bunch, Jamie?

When The Lord of the Rings first hit Italian shelves in the 1970s, the academic Elémire Zolla wrote a short introduction in which he interpreted the book as an allegory about “pure” ethnic groups defending themselves against contamination from foreign invaders. Fascist sympathisers in the Movimento Sociale Italiano (MSI) quickly jumped on the provocation. Meloni, an MSI youth wing member, developed her political consciousness in that environment. As a teenager she even attended a “Hobbit Camp”, a summer retreat organised by the MSI in which participants dressed up in cosplay outfits, sang along to folk ballads and discussed how Tolkienian mythologies could help the post-fascist right find credibility in a new era.

At this point, my eyes were rolling so much they nearly fell out of my head... 

Obviously, we’re talking about a fringe movement here. But it’s worth recognising that, with a little imagination, the sagas of Middle-earth do fit pretty neatly into the logic of contemporary rightwing populism.

Paging Dr Freud... 

 

Yes, Andrew's Really Doing That....

...and he's doing it splendidly!

'Are you really denying what I just said about British colonialism?' an exasperated Velshi asked his guest. 'Andrew, are you really doing that?'

You bet he is! 

As Roberts continues to say the UK abolished slavery more than 30 years before the United States did, Velshi seems to become more upset telling him: 'Andrew this is not a propaganda show,' and 'Andrew I need you to stop!

'I need you to stop for a second,' he interrupts his guest. 'Are you really taking issue with the horrors of colonialism?' he asks, to which Roberts replies: 'I'm taking issue with your remarks about slavery, which we abolished 32 years before you did. 'We didn't have to kill 600,000 people in a civil war over it,' he added.

Boom!  

But Velshi was not giving up.

Bitter, and ignorant, and not aware when he's been totally bested. Boy, can MSNBC pick 'em! 

'So you think that that's fine, that there are people all over the world who are born in colonial countries?' he asked. 'Because when I was born, the British Empire still existed. 'And that's OK for everybody to say.'

Roberts, though, asked Velshi which country he was born in, and when Velshi said he was born in Kenya, Roberts noted that 'the Kenyans not only supported the appointment of Prince Charles, now King Charles, as the head of the Commonwealth, we've [also] just had a fantastic statement from the president of Kenya saying what a wonderful thing —' Velshi then interrupted to note that President Biden is also going to the Queen's funeral, to which Roberts asked: 'Then why on Earth do you want to concentrate on the only negative things of an institution, which is 100 years ago now?'

TKO! That's what it is to get schooled on national tv!

He went on to interview chip-on-the-shoulder 'academics' like Kehinde Andrews, who told him what he wanted to hear. Bet he wished he'd only had him on...

Muggers And Junkies Were Bad Enough, Now I Might Have To Worry About Springheel Jack!

Young people may be nudged into carrying knives by the police, research has found, as a new count showed the Metropolitan police circulated more than 2,100 images of seized knives on Twitter in a year.

God, I hope that's just another useless bit of 'research' by some bunch of wacademics. Because.... 

Plenty pointed out this was incapable of being fired, but being the Internet, the mocking was swift, savage and merciless:

But this just reinforces my long held belief that for the modern police farce, Twitter is Kryptonite...

‘I had been under the impression that criticism of politicians was allowed in a democracy.’

I know how you feel, sweetie. 

I'd been under the impression that Cambridge academics were learned people worthy of respect, not chippy little racists who scream like stuck pigs when the methods they employ are used against them...

Last night Professor Gopal (Ed: yes, this one!) appealed to Michelle Donelan, the universities minister, saying her free speech had been curtailed. The request appeared to reference the Government’s new free speech bill, which will stop ‘no- platforming’ at universities.

She asked the minister on Twitter: ‘I’ve had a routine speaking engagement cancelled at short notice following pressure from a partisan campaign group. I know and deeply believe you to care about such gross infringements of academic freedom. Please help?’

Oh boy, and there's a HGV shortage too...

 I think this needs to be on permanent duty...

The wonder isn't, of course, that's she's been hastily disinvited; it's that she was invited in the first place, since she's notorious and has been for years...

Or perhaps to the civil servant who put her name forward, that was the whole point?

Brighton Should Twin With Berkeley, California...

The University of Brighton has appointed its first ever “activists in residence”.

Oh, really? Who are they? 

Shona Raine and Ven Paldano...

Nicely 'diverse'. So, how much is this grant? 

£2,000...

And what's it for? 

*blinks*

Let me read that again...

...the Queer Trans Intersex People of Colour (QTIPoC) Narratives Collective Brighton.

*laughs hysterically* 

And I Thought The Traditional British Silly Season Wouldn't Happen This Year...

...I should have known our wackademics had more fortitude than that! 

Sometimes A Cigar Is Just A Cigar...

...and sometimes a polar bear is just a polar bear! But Tyler Dean is disappointed:

These are two instances where racist subplots and worldbuilding in the novels have either been resolved or muted by the show.

'The show' being Phillip Pullman's extraordinary novels adapted for the BBC as 'His Dark Materials'. One of the best tv shows they've put on in 2019, at that.

But there is a slightly more unavoidable issue represented by the character of Iorek Byrnison. While Iorek is, of course, an armored, sentient polar bear and not a specific caricature of a particular ethnic group, he does generally accumulate tropes associated with the figure of the “noble savage.”

Oh. Here we go.

Enter Iorek Byrnison: a violent, intensely honor-driven character from a “primitive” culture who teaches the protagonist about life by virtue of their (in this case eventual) moral superiority. While the panserbjørn are, of course, not human beings, it is striking that much of the culture Pullman invents for them is based firmly in a series of Noble Savage stereotypes. When this is paired with offhand remarks in both the novels and the show about how Iorek was tricked into dishonorable behavior because he was given alcohol, we have a character that is an amalgam of Noble Savage stereotypes with a hint of First Nations-directed racism thrown in.

And who is this chap, who can apparently see racism in a children's book? Why, none other than one of California's finest whackademics, of course!

Tyler Dean is a professor of Victorian Gothic Literature. He holds a doctorate from the University of California Irvine and teaches at a handful of Southern California colleges.

I'm only astounded he hasn't - yet - featured in David Thompson's blog...

"Hey Siri, Show Me 'Devaluing'..."

Black students are failing to apply to Cambridge because there is a lack of Afro-Caribbean hairdressers in the city, the university’s pro-vice-Chancellor has said.

I don't know what's dafter, that excuse or the idea of a 'pro-vice-Chancellor'...

But lest you hurt yourself laughing, apparently, this is not just some excuse dreamed up by wackademics:

“We have been doing some quite detailed research, particularly with black students, particularly in London, looking at obstacles to applying to Cambridge and thinking about Cambridge.

And number three on the list was hairdressers,” he said.

I'm almost afraid to ask what numbers 1 and 2 were...

Universities are under pressure from the higher education regulator to admit more students from ethnic minorities and disadvantaged backgrounds.

One of the single most defining choices you'll make in your life, and you worry about getting your hair done? You aren't worthy of university.

But some moron with a degree will make sure you get one, anyway.

Science In The Age Of Wokeness....

Ton van Raan, a professor emeritus of quantitative science studies at Leiden University in the Netherlands, first likened the belated discovery of an academic work to the story of the Brothers Grimm fairytale some 15 years ago.

His colourful explanation was picked up by other leading scientists in the intervening years, making it a mainstay of academic discussion of the how crucial academic papers are often only seized upon decades after publication.

That phrase being 'Sleeping Beauty'. But then...

Van Raan said he was amazed when his latest work on medical articles was rejected in an email within hours of submission by the Journal of the Association for Information Science and Technology on the grounds that the term “sleeping beauties” was “unacceptable”.

The journal’s managing editor referred Van Raan to a lengthy explanation by editors in which it was claimed that the metaphor did not aid explanation and “the use of any such terms, despite connections to historical roots in the literature, should be avoided”.

The journal further argued that the story of Sleeping Beauty, in which a princess is put to sleep for 100 years until woken by a prince’s kiss, would not be immediately recognisable to academics worldwide.

Really? Even with the ubiquitous presence of the Disney version?

“The use of metaphors is complicated by socio-cultural factors and may not adequately translate across borders,” the journal explained.

 I think you meant 'opined'.

Van Raan said he could understand the discomfort with some uses of the metaphor but that the broad-brush ban was an unfortunate act of “political correctness”.

Of course it is. And - as David Thompson reminds us - the world of academe is nothing if not prone to kow-towing to such ridiculous concepts:

“I was always sober with the metaphor,” Van Raan said. “There was the sleeping beauty, the prince. And that is it. No fantasies.”

He said he had noted that a Belgian colleague had since used the phrase “hibernator” rather than sleeping princess and “awakener” for the role of the prince.

“I wrote to these authors to tell them, ‘You have capitulated’. Hibernator? It is like something out of Stanley Kubrick’s Space Odyssey,” Van Raan said.

“What is amazing is that they said it was culturally discriminatory because not everyone on this planet knows about this fairytale.”

No, what's amazing is that you haven't fallen into line. Yet.

But Wait, What About Those 'Cuts'..?

King's College London has been criticised over a "deeply problematic" policy to hire £12-an-hour "safe space marshals" to patrol events checking there is no offensive content.

I thought universities were struggling?

Job ads on KCL Student Union's website offers £11.89 per hour - £13.32 if holiday pay is included - to monitor student groups' talks "which have been risk assessed as having potential for a Safe Space breech [sic]".

I guess they don't teach English anymore....

The monitors are expected to put up "Safe Space posters" and take "immediate appropriate action" if the safe space policy is breached.

What, fisticuffs?

The marshals have the power to eject attendees - including speakers - from events if they do not comply.

They might have the power, but who knows if they have the ability....

A King's College London spokesman told the MailOnline: "Universities have a unique challenge to create environments in which open and uncensored debate from all sides on issues of political, scientific, moral, ethical and religious significance can take place without fear of intimidation and within the framework of the law.

"We are proud of our diverse community and are absolutely committed to academic freedom and free, peaceful and respectful dialogue where people have conflicting views."

Blah, blah, blah...

Because They Do Such A Bang-Up Job Teaching Reading, Writing And Arithmetic…

The survey of 10,000 pupils aged 14 and 15 in secondary schools across the UK found that more than half failed to identify what researchers described as good judgments when responding to a series of moral dilemmas, leading researchers to call for schools to have a more active role in teaching character and morality.

Good god! How on earth are they supposed to do (or perhaps in some cases, undo) in a school day what parents are supposed to have done all their lives?

“A good grasp of moral virtues, such as kindness, honesty and courage can help children to flourish as human beings, and can also lead to improvements in the classroom. And that level of understanding doesn’t just happen – it needs to be nurtured and encouraged,” said Prof James Arthur, director of Birmingham’s Jubilee Centre for Character and Virtues, which conducted the research.

Blimey! If that’s not a scary-sounding name, I don’t know what is…

So…what sort of moral dilemmas did these survey respondents have to look at, anyway?

In one moral dilemma designed to test courage, pupils were asked to rate the best and worst actions and justifications available to a school girl who was selected for a prestigious sports squad whose looks were being exploited by its coach for publicity.

The survey found that in many cases, pupils responded based on their self-interest, or from the perspective of avoiding involvement if they could act as if it was not happening.

Ah! I see! No great moral dilemmas here, just another warped attempt to shoehorn left-wing identity politics into the mix, and demand action when it ‘proves’ that not enough notice is taken of them.

While the range of schools surveyed included both state and private schools, the authors said there was a danger that those schools most interested in developing character were more willing to take part, as were teachers already interested in character education, potentially biasing the sample.

In addition, researchers warned that the moral dilemmas “may stimulate responses more in line with social desirability than a person’s actual moral responses in life” – meaning that pupils may have been giving what they perceived to be socially acceptable answers, rather than what they truly believed.

Junk science then. Best ignored.

Panic Over...

Rules which bar sex offenders from working with children are ‘unfair’ and even convicted paedophiles should have the right to adopt, a leading legal academic has said.

OMG! Really..?

Helen Reece, a reader in law at the London School of Economics....

Ahahahaha! Never mind. No-one's going to take that seriously.

In her article, Miss Reece suggested that the review should also introduce an assumption that sex offenders including child abusers posed no threat once they had served their sentence.

She said: "There is no reason why all sex offenders should not be considered as potentially suitable to adopt or foster children, or work with them.

“The Vetting and Barring Scheme and other legislative measures single out sex offenders for unfair special treatment and they destroy the principle that a prisoner pays his or her debt by serving their sentence before re-entering society on equal terms.”

I wonder where this airhead stood on the Chad Evans debacle..?

Well, I’m Sure This Will Be A Recipe For Unalloyed Success!

…it was Gove who paved the way to erode confidence in the arts, and he remains the inspiration for my effort to better advocate the arts to government.

This is why I intend to stand as an independent candidate in Surrey Heath, the constituency for which Gove is currently a member of parliament, in next year’s general election.

So says ‘Bob and Roberta Smith’ (no, not two people, just the affectation of British contemporary artist Patrick Brill).

Let the comedy begin!

In my manifesto I will argue that:

• No school should be allowed to offer a curriculum without art, music, drama, dance and design at GCSE and A-level.

• Ofsted must include arts subjects as part of its assessment of schools. No school can possibly be considered “outstanding” unless it offers art, music, drama, dance and design.

• All children must study at least one arts subject at GCSE.

• Postgraduate training for art teachers should be enriched, not eroded.

• All primary-level teachers must be trained in art, craft and music.

• “Artist educators” should be supported – that is, professional artists who teach while also developing their own art practice.

Oh, my…!

I would like to establish an artistic community in Surrey Heath based on the principles of Black Mountain college in upstate New York. The latter, an experimental school which operated from 1933-57, was a centre for innovation which encouraged artists like Robert Rauschenberg and Jasper Johns to reinvent American modernism, a kind of American Bauhaus which led to a renaissance in design.

I give it three months before they are reduced to cannibalism…

Most Tenuous ‘Racist’ Claim Of 2014…

In a ‘Indy’ article on the two upcoming ‘Jungle Book’ remakes:

Critics have interpreted both villagers and monkeys as Kipling's portrayal of nationalist Indians, ungovernable and subversive – the kind who caused the Mutiny in 1851. Kipling's enthusiastic endorsement of colonialism made him a pariah among 20th-century readers, especially after India became independent in 1947; and the Disney film of The Jungle Book drew accusations of racism, for inventing the character of King Louie, the head orang-utan, who cavorts and swings like the jazz singer and bandleader Cab Calloway while telling Mowgli, "I wanna be like you-hoo".

Campus Reform magazine reported in April this year that American university professors hoped that Disney's new film would make amends for the song, because King Louie "is not just a cartoon animal wishing to be human. Rather, Louie represents an African-American stating that he wants to be a member of the white race, which is represented by Mowgli."

Who’s….a little orphan Indian boy.

Oh, FAIL, wackademics!!