How Will They Get The Cork Out With Their Little Paws?

I mean, sometimes even I struggle, and I've got the benefit of opposable thumbs!

Does It Make You Illiterate Too?

Because the prospect of your children growing up to work for the 'Daily Mail' truly is terrifying.

Pardon..?

I...I just...

"Watch Out Sarge, He's Got A Hornet!"

Maybe I shouldn't have laughed at them for taking so long to end the siege...

"To Hell With It, Let's Just Make Up Our Own Words..."

 

"...who is ever going to notice?"

Need An 'N'..?

...I think you do!

Maybe If The Zoo Authorities Offered Them Immunity?

...or since they're elephants, peanuts? Then I bet they'd sing like canaries!

Are You Looking For A Cause, 'Mail'..?

*sighs*

Now We Just Need To Invent Drops...

...to improve proofreading ability!

When You Request An Image Of A Bird Of Paradise From The Photolibrary...

...but fail to specify it should be the bird. Not the plant.

"Hey, Editor, Any Animal That Kills Is A 'Predator', Right..?"

"Errr, yeah. I think that's right..."

Error In Translation..?

...or 'awareness' is really prized in Iceland?

Another Cockup. 'Mail'..?

Or can you just not tell a cockatiel from a cockatoo?

There, Their, Don't Worry...

*sighs*

Freudian Slip, Piers..?

..or just another 'Mail' transcription boo-boo..?

To Err Is Human, To Sin...Well...

H/T: Longrider via email

Must Have Been A Double Decker...

*sighs*

'S'..? 'Z'..?

"What's the difference anyway?"

H/T: Stephen Brown via email

Impressively Wrong, Even For The 'Mail'...

The nation's most beloved airplane? Well, no. It isn't.

The spotter points out: "These planes are Boulton Paul Defiants. They had no forward-firing guns, their only armament was the four .303 machine guns in the turret. The Spitfire was a single-seat fighter. The defiant had a crew of two and was never a great success."

H/T: Stephen Brown

"Tell Me Again About These Homophones, Boss?"

*sighs*