Relax, They'll Still Be Traditionally Painful When You Step On One In Bare Feet...

People are outraged that technology is being used to improve something again....

Tom Donaldson, senior vice president at the Lego Group, claimed the new smart brick system “brings creativity, technology and storytelling together to make building worlds and stories even more engaging, and all without a screen”.

Some people just seem to want to complain about every change to childhood favourites - I understand why, as so often it turns out not to be an improvement at all, but a response to some snowflake who wants things to be more 'multicultural', but this seems to be a genuine improvement!  

The smart bricks communicate with each other and will even decide whether enough accurate laser blasts have been delivered to achieve destruction. The smart bricks also emit light and play music. At a demonstration of the new toys, a Lego executive explained that, when playing with Darth Vader’s craft, “once in a while you get The Imperial March, just to get the vibe going”.

As a kid, who wouldn't want that? What could the objection possibly be?  

...some argue new ‘Smart Play’ technology undermines the Danish construction toy’s gift for harnessing a child’s own imagination.

Well, imagination doesn't seem to be something valued in children anymore, since they might use it in ways policymakers don't like. 

Why Can't You Leave It Up To The Australian Parents Themselves To Stand Firm, Then?

Australia's landmark social media ban for children is being challenged in the nation's highest court, with two teenagers alleging the law is unconstitutional as it robs them of their right to free communication.

And the response? 

After news of the case broke, Communications Minister Anika Wells told parliament the government would not be swayed. "We will not be intimidated by threats. We will not be intimidated by legal challenges. We will not be intimidated by big tech. On behalf of Australian parents, we will stand firm," she said.

Why can't they, then, and if they feel giving their children access is a risk, not allow them to access it? Why do they need the hand of government to act for them? What the hell happened to Australia to make them such cravens who freak out at children's TV stars appearing in 'unsavory' music videos? 

Is it because every visit to the loo or game of football in the back garden runs the risk of death by lethal wildlife?

Noah Jones argued the government's policy was "lazy". "We are the true digital natives and we want to remain educated, robust, and savvy in our digital world... They should protect kids with safeguards, not silence."

 Sounds like the kids are alright to me...

Though opposed by the tech companies who will be charged with enforcing it, the ban is supported by most Australian adults, according to polls. However, some mental health advocates say it may cut kids off from connection, and others say it could push youngsters to even-less-regulated corners of the internet.

We'll see... 

We Know The Real Goal Of This, And It’s Not ‘Protection Of The Children’

Ofcom has warned social media companies they will be punished if they fail to take significant extra steps to address the problem of children pretending to be adults online. A newly released survey, conducted by the UK media regulator, indicates 22% of eight to 17 year olds lie that they are 18 or over on social media apps.

Yes, what's driving this is registration of everyone on social media by the back door, under the guise of 'protecting children'.  

This is despite the Online Safety Act (OSA) requiring platforms to beef-up age verification, a responsibility that will come into force in 2025. Ofcom told the BBC its "alarming" findings showed tech firms had lots to do to meet that new legal standard - and said they would face enforcement action if they failed to do so. It said children being able to pass for adults increased their risk of being exposed to harmful content. "Platforms need to do much, much more to know the age of their children online," Ian Mccrae, Director of Market Intelligence at Ofcom told the BBC.

There's really only one way to do that, isn't there? And it's not going to stop at children wanting access to social media, it's going to affect everyone. Powerful people want to strip anonymity from the Internet, and this is the Trojan Horse they will use to get it. 

A number of tech firms have recently announced measures to make social media safer for young people, such as Instagram launching "teen accounts." However, when BBC news spoke to a group of teenagers at Rosshall Academy, in Glasgow, all of them said they used adult ages for their social media accounts. "It’s just so easy to lie about your age", said Myley, 15. “I put in my actual birthday - like day and month - but when it gets to the year, I’ll just scroll ten years back," she added. “There’s no verification, they don’t ask for ID, they don’t ask for anything," added another pupil, Haniya, who is also 15.

The kids seem all right to me.  

Well, Kiddies, Keep Your Mouths Shut, Then!

A poisonous plant on an overgrown path close to a primary school has raised concerns about children's safety.

The head teacher of Bucklesham Primary School in Suffolk said pupils had to walk in the road to avoid the hemlock, which can be fatal if ingested.

Unless they walk to school with their mouths open like basking sharks, what 'danger' are they really in? 

A village parish councillor warned "children's lives are at stake" and called for the plant's urgent removal.

Good grief, is this village entirely chock-full of hysterical risk-averse ninnies? 

Suffolk County Council said Monday was the earliest it was able to clear the path because a road closure was needed.

Oh. That's a big 'Yes!' then... 

H/T: Hackney Dr of Maaate via Twitter

Well, Of Course They Did...

The children’s commissioners of Wales, Scotland and Northern Ireland have written to the UK government calling on it to scrap the controversial two-child limit restricting the amount that larger families can receive in social security benefits.

They want to ensure their jobs. So of course, they need to increase child misery, and what better way to do it than by fighting government plans to decrease it?

While the administrations in Cardiff, Edinburgh and Belfast have put tackling child poverty at the top of their agenda, the control of benefits such as universal credit and child tax credit is not devolved, which limits their power to make changes that could help youngsters experiencing deprivation.

Sensible decision not to devolve it; the government clearly saw what would happen. 

The limit, which was introduced as way of cutting £1bn a year from the welfare bill, bars parents from claiming the child element in tax credits or universal credit for third or subsequent children born after 6 April 2017.

The loss of benefits is worth £2,900 per child per year. The open letter to Coffey claims the limit breaches children’s rights to an adequate standard of living and is contributing to a rising gap in poverty levels between families with three or more children and smaller households.

If anyone's 'breaching children's rights to an adequate standard of living', it's their parents first and foremost. And then the advocates for indiscriminate and irresponsible breeding.  

It also noted that the policy also has disproportionate impacts on social groups where larger families are more common, such as some minority faith and ethnic groups and in Northern Ireland, where families are larger than the rest of the UK.

Ah, if all else fails, proffer the Race Card.  

Special Pleading By Proxy

A six-year-old has written to the Prime Minister to plead for school funding so a beloved singing teacher can remain in post.

Otis Carter wrote the letter yesterday, upon learning that freelancer Al Start would not be returning to work at Elm Grove primary school in Brighton after this half term.

Otis’s mother Deb Friis, 43, told The Argus her son was so upset on hearing the news that after a conversation about politics he decided to write to the Prime Minster.

Hmmm, when I was six, my letters were mostly to Father Christmas...

Ms Friis, who works as a maths teacher (Ed: aha!) at St Pauls secondary school in Burgess Hill, said: “They told the children last Wednesday and Otis was crying when he walked home.

“We talked about politics and he’s very aware of what’s going on and he said ‘I’m going to write to Theresa May’.

“He came up with the words and we helped him with the spelling.”

Sure you did. That's all you helped him with, I'm sure...

Something Must Be Done!

Parents are calling for tougher safety measures at a crossing in West Way after a four-year-old girl was hit by a car.

The pupil from Botley School suffered fractures to her legs and a minor head injury after she was struck as she crossed the road last Thursday.

The schoolgirl was using the pedestrian crossing when it is claimed the vehicle, travelling at 20mph, drove through a red light.

I’m not sure what more ‘must be done’, frankly. Rules of the road are clear, but there’s nothing to really stop people disobeying them, if that’s what happened.

District councillor Emily Smith, whose children also attend the primary school, said: “I’m wondering whether a 20mph zone might slow cars down and help drivers to notice traffic lights turning red. “

Well, given the driver in this case was estimated at 20mph then…no.

But surely if he really did run a red light, the police will come down on him like a ton of bricks?

Spokeswoman for Thames Valley Police, Charlotte Redman, confirmed that no arrests have been made in relation to the incident.

Hmmm. Perhaps the witnesses’ insistence that the light was red should be taken with a pinch of salt?

Wait, Using Children As Human Shields Is OK Now..?

…because I thought we all got really upset when Saddam Hussein did it?

Education experts are calling on the government to review its bedroom tax after early research indicated it was having an adverse impact on learning because affected children were stressed and hungry at school.

Which is unfortunate, but 100% the responsibility of their parents.

Researchers from Manchester University found that children were showing signs of emotional distress because they were seeing their parents under pressure and were experiencing material hardship as a result of the benefit cut. Parents were having to cut back on food, shopping for fewer and cheaper provisions, and hungry children were finding it harder to concentrate in lessons, sometimes leading to classroom unrest and aggressive behaviour, the report said.

Aha! Yet another excuse to be trotted out when ‘It ain’t ‘is fault, ‘e ‘as that ADHD!’ stops working…

The study, by researchers at Manchester Institute of Education, found that forcing children to share bedrooms – under the policy, two children of the same sex under 16 are expected to share, as are two children under 10 regardless of sex – was also having a negative impact on learning, with no quiet place for homework and teenagers’ sleep disturbed by younger siblings.

So a hard-working parent struggling to afford rent must see a benefit monkey get a larger house so their kids can have separate bedrooms? I should cocoa!

Erica Burman, also professor of education at Manchester, added: “The government should review its policy. Doing so would show a greater commitment to supporting children, helping parents to maintain their responsibilities, reinforcing communities, tackling educational inequalities and ensuring that the effects of austerity do not fall disproportionately on poor families.”

Everything will fall ‘disproportionately’ on poor families – it’s an incentive not to be poor in the first place!

In addition, the Manchester research claimed that the policy was not persuading families to downsize. As well as a lack of suitable smaller properties in the social housing sector, parents said they were prepared to lose money and suffer the hardship in order to stay in their home and keep local family ties and friendships.

So, it’s their choice. They are the ones condemning their offspring to these disadvantages. Not my problem. Certainly not worth a single penny more of my taxes.

Schools and community groups have responded to increased need by reallocating resources to ensure that children are fed and clothed. Schools have used pupil premium funding, available to children from deprived backgrounds who are on free school meals, to extend breakfast clubs.

Clearly the schools have too much fat in the budget. Time to cut it again, Education Secretary!