Friday, 11 July 2014

This Is Why We Can’t Have Nice Things…

An alpaca trekking business has had to shut after yobs hurled rocks at the terrified animals.

Jackie Kendall, 51, from Noak Bridge, transformed an old play area at Wat Tyler Park, Pitsea, into an enclosure for Oreo, Fudge and Valliant, but it proved to be an easy target for vandals. The enclosure was also not secure, meaning dogs regularly found a way in.
Lovely! Meanwhile…
A gang of teenagers surrounded a man and battered him with bottles and fence posts in a vicious attack. Neighbours said the teens ripped off their shirts and were screaming “like animals” as they laid into the man when he asked them to keep the noise down.

Two other neighbours were also attacked, after they came out to help. A 21- year-old man suffered a cut to his head, while a 24-year old man had a cut to the right side of his head.
Well, it is Pitsea. And the police?
Essex Police are appealing for anyone with information to contact Det Con Angela Toppin at Basildon CID on 101.
Maybe if you’d got off your backsides and attended the scene, you’d have caught a few, eh?

15 comments:

Macheath said...

While I have to admit I am struggling slightly with the idea of alpaca trekking in Basildon, the whole thing has more than a touch of Douglas Adams:

Meanwhile, the natural forces on the planet Vogsphere [...] brought forth ... elegant gazelle-like creatures with silken coats and dewy eyes which the Vogons would catch and sit on. They were no use as transport because their backs would snap instantly, but the Vogons sat on them anyway.

Perhaps, when creating 'one of the most unpleasant races in the galaxy', a writer who grew up in Brentwood didn't need to look far for inspiration.

Anonymous said...

Where I live in West Kent, the 'District Commander' a ridiculously overblown title for a chief inspector has guaranteed that there will always be FOUR constables on duty across the district. FOUR! 143 square miles and all based in the delightful hell hole that is Swanley in the far north of the district. That's why they will never attend the scene of such things.

Anonymous said...

Essex police are not appealing - most of those desk-bound lard-arses are not eye-candy.

Anonymous said...

My daughter was in Wat Tyler a few weeks back and she told me that they were charging about £10 to “walk” with an alpaca. From what I understand is that you hold the reigns and walk alongside it around the park, not exactly what I would call trekking. S for charging a £10, well, maybe the rocks were not thrown at the animals, more the thief exploiting them?
PS I am a resident of Pitsea; the better part; pronounced Vonjèè.

Ed P said...

"Transformed" does not quite agree with "the area was not secure" So some batty old woman thought it would be fine to erect a makeshift fence to protect her business/animals? You'd think the dogs getting in might have alerted her to how unsuitable this "enclosure" was.

Anonymous said...

I must have missed the part Julia where the article said that the police didn't attend-please point me to it.
I expect you think police should be on every street-corner.Even MTG harks back to the days of the "village Sergeant".
When Teresa May says that the front-line hasn't been affected by cuts she is lying.
Jaded

MTG said...

In his ignorance, Tom Winsor suggested Essex police were plain 'lazy' and that they falsified their crime figures. What he didn't know was these poor plodders become over tired earning their second incomes with employers who are real sticklers for wakefulness.

And what a cracking Echo comment:

"Meanwhile in Thorpe bay, a big issue seller was spotted on the boulevard and a helicopter, 3 patrol cars & ARU arrived within minutes."

Anonymous said...

Someone who quotes Tom Winsor shows his own ignorance.Neither of you know anything about policing but you both think you are experts.
Jaded

wpc jilted said...

it cos day dunt no nuttin jsded

Flaxen Saxon said...

Well yobs are yobs and animals and all sentient beings should be kept well away from them. Perhaps we should build a secure enclosure to keep undesirables in. No dogs allowed. I like dogs. Then we could lob in a neutron bomb or two. Napalm works. I like napalm too. It does what it says on the can.

Rightwinggit said...

"..PS I am a resident of Pitsea; the better part; pronounced Vonjèè..."

Or Vange , also known as vagina, or cuntland...

JuliaM said...

"...the whole thing has more than a touch of Douglas Adams..."

Indeed so... :/

"...and she told me that they were charging about £10 to “walk” with an alpaca. "

Well, that sounds a lot better than most things you can do for a tenner in Essex...

"You'd think the dogs getting in might have alerted her to how unsuitable this "enclosure" was."

Maybe so. But standing there with a shotgun might have helped!

JuliaM said...

"I must have missed the part Julia where the article said that the police didn't attend..."

Oh, they attended. Well AFTER the event.

When there was no danger of having to do anything...

"Perhaps we should build a secure enclosure to keep undesirables in. "

So... a big fence around Liverpool, then?

Anonymous said...

I like Flaxen Saxon's problem solving. Might free up space in public housing for the deserving rather than the demanding.

Anonymous said...

So they did attend then?Which is it? But they weren't round the corner? Perhaps they were dealing with something else?
"Essex police a bobby on every corner,except when it doesn't suit Julia M" should be their new slogan.
Jaded