This Isn't Bangladesh...

Manager Shah Hussain admitted that a woman had been hit after a problem with one of the fireworks.

He said: "I think maybe we got the wrong fireworks."

I think maybe you forgot which country you were in...

"It was like a cake box. I don’t know if it was a problem with the manufacturers of the fireworks but it should be firing straight upwards, not towards at the restaurant."

A poor workman always blames his tools...

"Every year we get a few fireworks and we do it outside the restaurant - I wouldn't call it a display."

I bet the council would!

Shah went on to say that they had not charged Jo and her party the £270 their meal and drinks came to, while they had also given her some bottles of wine after what happened to her.

He continued: "I went after her to ask if she was okay but she just started swearing at me."

Yeah, that often happens when someone's almost been maimed by your criminal negligence...