They Might ‘Give A Stuff’ If Dogs Start Using Facebook, Mr Clubb…

Mr Clubb rushed to the vets from the scene in Chalk Road and Cassie was due to have surgery yesterday morning after suffering cuts to the face and an injured eye.

He added: “I phoned 999, but the police couldn’t give a stuff.

“I got a text message from police saying they wouldn’t come out until between 9pm and 10pm the next night.

"There is a dog on the loose with the taste of blood and our police force won’t come out until the next day.

“I haven’t slept all night. I’m so angry by all of this. I want to know what they are going to do about this.”

Probably ‘sod all’. It is, after all, their usual response.

A dog attacking another dog is not a criminal offence, however, it is the owner’s legal responsibility to keep control of their pets if they are a danger to the public.

Hmm, I guess they didn’t get that memo in Greater Manchester:

A spokesman for Greater Manchester Police said: “We were called at 2.06pm - a man had been walking his dog through the city centre.

“He came across a dog that got a bit worked up and bit his dog.

“The man was then chased by the dog, described to be large, white with black patches.”

And…what are you doing? Nothing?

The 31-year-old waiter said: “It’s worrying because if it had been a young kid or a vulnerable person it could have been a different story.

“The owner might just need some help in learning how to control the dog.

“He apologised and tried to get the dog back by shouting it’s name, eventually he managed to drag him away.

“I love dogs but I was having to kick it away.

“I didn’t even realise I was in the road at first - I was getting dragged around by this big dog with cars coming towards me.”

That sounds like a dog out of the control of its owner to me.

But then, I don’t have the ‘special training’ that you need to be a police officer who doesn’t want to do any work.

Well, I Suppose You Could Ask Yourself...

...'Has it got four legs, whiskers and a loud purr'..?

No, I Think They Probably Said Something Quite Different...

...something like 'You can catch crabs quite easily on Chalkwell Beach after dark'.

Sunday Funnies...

Did everyone have a good Hallowe'en...?

Have A Truly Terrifying Hallowe’en

A graffiti artist and clothes designer will be offering children the opportunity to celebrate Halloween with a more alternative experience this year.

More ‘diverse’ than an American imported holiday..?

Blingwear UK will be running a “Hip Hop Halloween” event on Tottenham High Road, providing both spooky and street activities for young children.

The event on October 31 will include a rap/poem workshop…

AIIIEEEEEEIEEEEE!!!!!!!!

So…Do They Plan To Do Any Actual Teaching..?

School “champions” from Barnet and Haringey have been recognised for their work to…

Get pupils skilled up in reading, writing, and sums?

… promote safe travel in their schools.

*sighs*

STARS (Sustainable Travel: Active, Responsible, Safe) is a TfL programme that supports schools with school travel plan activities that help young people adopt safer and sustainable ways of travelling.

OK, well, let’s look at the detail, shall we, before we jump to the conclusion that it’s all a pile of lefty bollocks?

Ms Wishart used innovative projects including planning and running scooting lessons with her Year Two pupils, and has encouraged sustainable travel through the programme since 2007.

Her hard work has helped achieve a 12 per cent reduction in car use, according to TfL.

OK, never mind whether that’s even in her remit as a teacher. Any idea how she's supposedly done this …?

Ms Nath has used a creative approach at Moss Hall Infant School, such as her pupil scooter dance that was performed at the Annual Barnet Dance Festival.

She also led a successful campaign including pupils, councillors, governors and parents to get a new zebra crossing installed and a 20 mph zone outside the school.

Hopefully all in her own time..? Not in school time?

Well, the last had better be an improvement:

Mr Pollard and Ms Doyle have taught young people in Haringey with very little confidence to become totally independent travellers, understanding the different bus numbers and reading a timetable.

I…

I just….

Post Title Of The Month

Longrider finds the perfect title for his own take on the Karl Andree saga:

Quote Of The Month

MacHeath in fine form on modern feminist icons:

"I can appreciate, for example, that Minaj wishes to ridicule the objectification of women, but I have to admit to some difficulty in seeing exactly how this is achieved by writhing around slathered in baby oil and pouting at the camera, patting the rear of a shapely bikini-clad dancer or crawling on all fours around a seated man, however ironic the intention."

Honorable runner-up is The Stigler at Mark Wadsworth's blog with some sage travel advice:

"The way I avoid being detained by a bunch of bastards in Iran is simple: I don't go to Iran. It's very simple. And if my employers asked me to, I'd tell them to piss off."

Post Of The Month

Squander Two takes aim and scores a direct centre-mass hit on the hoplophobes.

Essex Police Say ‘Pay Up Or We’ll Have To Shoot This Baby Seal*!’

Police will not marshal Canvey’s annual remembrance parade as a result of police cuts.

Well, of course!

Yet I bet those same cuts won’t stop them going out of their way to harass someone on behalf of the establishment:

A former police officer received a £2,000 police payout after officers unlawfully raided his home on suspicion of harassing Essex’s highways chief.

Ken Mason, of Great Ranton, Pitsea, had written several emails to Rodney Bass expressing his unhappiness with the county’s part-night lighting scheme. But the messages led to Mr Mason wrongly being accused of sending hate mail to Mr Bass’s home address.

He was arrested and his computer was seized, but he was later released without charge.

They should have to pay that £2000 out of their own pockets. That’ll be more effective than any retraining.

*H/T: @Misanthrope Girl via Twitter and Rob in comments here