Post Title Of The Month

Mike Cunningham at 'Orphans' on the latest Brexit chart topper:

Quote Of The Month

Obnoxio The Clown on the hand behind the curtain:

"The resources of the civil service are being brought to bear: briefings, research (that we pay for!) and ready access for pro-EU journalists. They are also scrambling to come up with a half-assed plan for Brexit. It would not surprise me in the least if some last-minute excuse came along.

The civil service has already briefed that we're not losing any EU regulations. They are being cast into law, so that their precious empires are not destroyed, the way they should be."

Post Of The Month

Dick Puddlecote has a book review, and it's a very salutary one.

I Didn't Know Being An Attention-Seeking Moron...

Jonathan Taylor, defending, said Bank had been suffering from depression and was told there was a possibility he had a hereditary disease.

“He wasn’t directly targeting anyone and that is shown by the fact nobody was injured,” said Mr Taylor.

“He knows he has put the emergency services to a great deal of inconvenience and he is sorry.”

...was a hereditary disease. Did you?

Volunteers To Drive The Coach...?

Two Iranian Pizza Shop workers who groomed and sexually abused a 14-year-old girl fear they could be executed in their homeland if they are deported after serving a total of 33 years in prison.

Oh dear, how sad, etc....

Gareth Hughes, mitigating for Zare, said deportation proceedings started against his client following a separate conviction for drugs offences in 2015.

He said: “These sort of offences involving sexual activity with children are a capital offence in Iran. So if he is to be deported at some stage his future is really precarious.

“That’s something that he will have to live with. It’s a fact that is causing him considerable fear.”

Good!

Chav Culture, Chav Dog...

A Grimsby man who received horrific injuries when his pet of 10 years attacked him on Christmas Day says he is "heartbroken" that he had to kill his own dog as he "ripped his arm to pieces".

As reported first by the Grimsby Telegraph, the dog was later found in a wheelie bin – although mystery surrounds how it got there.

Really? Hmmm, it's been done.

Owner John Green – who spent four days in Hull Royal Infirmary after the incident, says he has absolutely no idea how Stafforshire Bull Terrier Rio ended up in there and wants to put across his side of the story after hearing many rumours circulating – including that he stabbed the animal and dumped the body himself.

So he didn't stab it?

"I did kill the dog, but I had choked it because there was nothing else that I could do, Rio had latched on to my arm and he was ripping it to pieces, and I defy anyone who says that they wouldn't do the same thing if they were in my position, it was self-defence."

Oh, OK, he choked it. Minor detail!

He also has "no idea" how Rio ended up in a bin – where he was found by member of the public Glenn Sharp - as he had been receiving treatment at Hull Royal Infirmary until Thursday, and was shocked to return home and find that his dog was missing, as he expected him to still be in his house when he returned.

You expected a dog corpse to be stored at your house for four days..?!?!?

He continued: "While I was in hospital I had asked family members to contact Blue Cross to see if they would be able to come around and collect Rio, but apparently the person who is tasked with these collections was on holiday so nobody was ever able to make it round.

"When I got home I found my front door open, and Rio was missing, so I have no idea who has taken him or how he ended up in a bin, I think its utterly insulting to my dog and my family that someone would think to dispose of him like that, as we had planned to give him a proper send off whenever I got home from hospital.

What had you planned, a horse-drawn hearse with black plumes? It's a vicious animal that's put you in hospital, for the love of..!

"There have been all sorts of people making accusations about what has gone on, and I want to let them know the truth, this was a horrible tragedy that has left my family and I heartbroken."

I think the only 'tragedy' here is that you got out of hospital...

Well Played, WiFi Owner...

...well played indeed.

"Shall we look through this book of baby names, Candeece..?"

"Nah, pass me the bag of Scrabble tiles, innit?"

Sunday Funnies...

You forgot to add in 'Because the human race is made up of people who want to believe they are right, and who will jump on anything that reinforces their prejudices'...

Who Lost Them, Then?

Police say the motive for the murder was “unclear” and friends of the schoolboy refused to discuss a possible reason, with one saying the sports-loving boy was simply in “the wrong place at the wrong time”.

His aunt Jackie Dennis mourned the loss of “another innocent child.”

She told the Standard: “I don’t even know what to say. It’s so sad, and confusing. Just... why?

“He was a loving, caring boy. He looked tiny for his age. They called him little Peanut because his dad’s name is Peanut.

“How did somebody manage to kill a child in front of everybody, with no fear, like it’s just a normal thing?

“There’s something going wrong with the children of today – they’re fearless. It’s like they’re lost.”

I'm not too worried. The demographic that's 'lost' seems to be a singular one.

Another friend said “He liked music. He was a funny guy, he liked making people laugh, I know that for sure. He made funny jokes, posting stuff on Instagam.

“He was well known, he never had any problems with anyone. He was an entertainer.”

When asked whether he had heard about the circumstances that led to Quamari’s death, the boy said: “I’m not going to get into that.”

*rolls eyes*

Quamira’s godmother Sylvia Tella, speaking outside the school, said: “Everybody who is here and walks away from this you know in your heart that it could happen to you or to anybody.

“This life did not die in vain. Us as a people have to stand together and take away these knives off the roads.”

Then start supporting the efforts to do just that. Start demanding the return of the policies that help in this effort. Start speaking up against the usual suspects.

No, We Have 'The Big Problem' When It Comes To These Offences...

November:

A 25-year-old banned driver sped away from police after he was seen behind the wheel.

Blackburn magistrates heard that despite driving over a ‘stinger’ Salim Shah raced away at speeds of up to 65mph in built-up areas, jumping red lights and forcing other vehicles to take evasive action.

The court was told he eventually suffered problems due to the punctured tyres and was arrested.

The whole family appears to be scum, mind you:

Peter King, defending, said his client accepted the matter had crossed the custody threshold but asked the magistrates to grant him bail pending his appearance at the Crown Court.

He said Shah lived at home with his father who was sole carer for his elderly grandparents. His father is appearing at another court this morning and is likely to go to prison,” said Mr King.

“The responsibility for caring for his grandparents was going to fall to my client and the stupid commission of these offences is putting them in some jeopardy.

“Bail would give him the opportunity to make arrangements for their care whatever the outcome when he is sentenced at the Crown Court.”

And what sentence did he get? Was it one that reflected the seriousness of the offences?

December:

Shah, 25, of Blackburn Road, Great Harwood, pleaded guilty to dangerous driving and driving while disqualified, and having no car insurance. He was jailed for 12 months and banned from driving for a further two years.

The Lancashire Telegraph has highlighted Shah’s conduct as part of the Stop The Madness roads campaign. Shah was jailed for 16 months in 2014, at the same court, for a police pursuit which saw him filming the incident in a selfie style.

He even asked police: “It was a good chase wasn’t it?” when eventually caught.

Bring on the usual excuses!

Marianne Alton, defending, said her client knew he was facing a prison sentence and accepted he had ‘a big problem’ when it came to cars.

She told the court he wanted to put his driving record behind him and had signed up to learn a trade while on remand in prison.

The defendant, who is teetotal, had offered to drive friends home from a night out in Manchester, as they had been drinking, added Miss Alton.

They'd have probably been safer with a drunk behind the wheel...

#NotAllHorseOwners....

A witness said they saw a white pick-up truck pull up and leave the body there at around 5.30pm.

Inspector Kate Fletcher said: “It is difficult to know for sure how this horse died, but he was in a terrible state and would definitely have suffered before he died.

“The horse was very young, probably just a year old, was suffering from diarrhoea, and emaciated. He looked as if he had had redworm and not been treated for it.

“The rope was likely put round his neck to drag him - so he could be dumped like rubbish by the side of this road.

“We urge anyone with any information about how the horse died and how the body came to be dumped in this way to call us.

“Sadly it is not uncommon for horses to suffer from redworm at this time of year. This is easily treated, but if they are not they go downhill very quickly. We would like to remind all horse owners to de-worm their animals at this time of year.”

Oh, pull the other one, love!

We all know who are the likely suspects here, and we all know exactly why your charity won't do the necessary prevention work to ensure this doesn't happen again and again and again...

Sadly situations concerning abandoned and fly-grazing horses are still frequent, making it more difficult for the RSPCA and other horse charities to monitor the welfare of certain horses, when they are currently on the move.

What's making it difficult isn't the type of horse, is it?

It's Like 'Twin Peaks' Set In Croydon!

PC Ryan Edwards, based in Croydon, accepted a caution for causing criminal damage to a home in West Sussex.

His actions were not proven to be serious enough to constitute gross misconduct, or for him to be dismissed.

He threw a log through someone's window! But it's OK, he's sorry:

...given that this was a single and brief incident where the officer was immediately remorseful to the complete acceptance of the subsequent consequences of his actions and given that there were no issues of honesty and integrity, I do not believe this constitutes as gross misconduct.

“Therefore considering all the facts of the case I do not believe his actions discredit the service as serious to justify his dismissal."

So why did he do it?

No details have been given on why PC Edwards threw the log through the window.

Answers on a postcard! What could have motivated Croydon's answer to the Log Lady..?

How Very Unsavory...

Tyrone Savory, 24, of Union Terrace, was pulling out of a petrol station in the early hours of the morning when the Ford Transit van he was driving was spotted by officers in a marked BMW.

Noticing the van did not have its lights on, police pursued the vehicle down Boroughbridge Road into Poppleton.

And that's where the 'fun' starts...

The blue lights were switched on, but Savory - who was disqualified from driving, was uninsured and on a suspended prison sentence - took a sharp right-hand turn onto Station Road in Poppleton, York Crown Court heard.

With his lights still off he veered onto the right-hand side of the road into the path of an oncoming vehicle.

A catastrophe was narrowly averted when the van mounted a curb and drove along the pavement, Rob Galley told the court in prosecution.

Lucky no-one was killed.

“The defendant emerged, wearing all grey clothing, and ran towards (an address in) Station Road,” Mr Galley said. An officer with a police dog chased Savory who climbed a high fence in a bid to escape.

He was caught and arrested.

I hoped to see 'mauled' in there too....

Savory admitted dangerous driving, driving without insurance and driving while disqualified during the incident in the early hours of October 2.

He also admitted failing to comply a suspended jail sentence by skipping unpaid-work sessions.

Mr Galley said Savory had previous convictions for offences including burglary, handling stolen goods, affray, driving matters and failing to surrender to bail.

In May he was given a four-month prison sentence, suspended for a year, for running away from police after being stopped on suspicion of drink-driving. On that occasion, Savory was riding a moped with a female passenger which was stopped by a police officer. As the female constable was dealing with the passenger, Savory fled but was arrested a few days later and charged with escaping lawful custody.

Bring on the excuses!

Savory’s solicitor Neil Cutte said the father-of-one, who has been working as a car valeter in Clifton Moor, could give no explanation for his latest motoring offence other than “panic” on being pursued by police.

Can't think why. It must be as usual an occurrence for him as not being pursued by police is for the law-abiding...

Judge Paul Batty QC blasted Savory for trying to outrun police and told him: “For one so young, you are amassing quite a record.”

Savory was jailed for 18 months and given a three-year driving ban.

Because the last one worked so well...

The Worth Of A Cop And A Puppy...

Madeline Corr, mitigating, said Popham was “full of remorse” and wanted to “throw himself on the mercy” of Judge Ian Graham after admitting the offences at an earlier hearing.

She said he still has no memory of the night and cannot explain his behaviour, but she said he was self-medicating for mental problems.

Self-medicating, eh? Well, I suppose that's one new name for it..

Popham, who has previous convictions for violence and cultivating cannabis, suffers from emotionally unstable personality disorder.

Translation: "Is a scummy waste of oxygen who should have been strangled at birth"

Popham was jailed for a total of 20 months at Basildon Crown Court.

Is that all?

He was handed one month each for causing unnecessary suffering to an animal and assaulting a police officer, to run concurrently to each other and the other sentences.

FFS!

Outsmarted Again...

Officers went to Ali's mum's house at 8am on June 26 and she answered the door. The court was told Ali was still in bed and officers went upstairs and told him he was under arrest on suspicion of theft. Ms Pritchard said as he was still in his pyjamas Ali asked if he could get dressed, a request which was granted.

She said: "He was then asking if he could use the bathroom. He was searched and police found nothing on him.

"He went into the bathroom. The police could hear noises from the tap. Mr Ali's mum was shouting for him to hurry up. The officers realised he was taking too long and went in to the bathroom. They noticed the bathroom window was open.

"The defendant had climbed onto the kitchen window and escaped."

/facepalm

Ali, who appeared in the dock in handcuffs and had been in custody for 14 weeks before his sentencing hearing, pleaded guilty to theft and escaping from lawful custody.

Judge Beverley Lunt (Ed: *groans*) sentenced him to 120 unpaid work (sic) and warned him if he didn't fully comply with the order she would send him to prison.

Where he'll no doubt ask for a big poster of Rita Hayworth,

I Don't Think She's Even Worth That!

School governor and mother-of-three Lorna Hayden said her life and career was devastated after her neck went "pop" as she lifted a 16 stone patient at work.

The 34-year-old, of Crowborough, who worked for Kent and Sussex Hospital until 2007, is suing Maidstone and Tunbridge Wells NHS Trust but its lawyers claim the cardiac psychologist is only worth £4,414.

What on earth is a 'cardiac psychologist' anyway?

A Facebook post was highlighted of her winning a nursery sports day race in 2013 dressed as George Pig from the popular children's show, according to national newspaper reports.

She told the High Court in London: "My pain differs from day to day." Mr Justice Jay will rule on the case on a date to be set.

Can't wait for that!

Don't You Feel Enriched, Lewisham..?

Following the attack the café owner spoke of his horror after his family were put in hospital following the attack by “more than 50 teenagers”.

Aziz Garip owns the Centre Café Shop in Lewisham but wasn’t at the cafe when the teenagers showed up.

Mr Garip said: “My wife and my son were attacked and were put in hospital.

“In more than 13 years I have never had anything like this happen.”

Except he has...

“Six or seven months ago they came inside and attacked me but not like this. This time it was a lot more. It felt like all of the school showed up.

Yes, it seems they turn up to do this while in school uniform. Well, why not? It's not like anyone is likely to expect any discipline from the school, any more than from any other authority figure.

Three officers were also injured during the incident. One female officer suffered a broken wrist, one male officer suffered a dislocated shoulder, and one male PC suffered a cut to his arm.

Probably because they were about as much use as the Avon & Somerset cops in the posts at Tim Worstall's blog and Tim Newman's blog.

Three boys - aged 16, 15 and 14 - and a 14-year-old girl, were arrested on suspicion of affray and criminal damage to a nearby café. A second girl was also arrested on suspicion of affray and criminal damage and further arrested on suspicion of grievous bodily harm.

All those arrested were taken into custody at a south London police station and have since been released on bail until dates in late March pending further enquiries.

Enquiries by Lewisham Borough officers into the circumstances of the incident are ongoing.

Are they trying to find if there's some way they can blame the cafe owner for inciting the little darlings, I wonder?

So Very Different From The Home Life Of Our Own Dear Queen..

Andrea Fawcett, prosecuting, said on the night of the incident both parties and other witnesses had been drinking.

“The catalyst for this incident appears to be who had eaten more of the chips than the other person,” said Mrs Fawcett.

“The aggrieved refused to make a statement but it appears that during the row she has picked up a kitchen knife.”

Mrs Fawcett said Clayton held the knife against Mr Hill while shouting at him and then poked him with it.

“Given that a knife was involved the injury is far less serious that it could have been,” said Mrs Fawcett.

You mean, if she hadn't been blind drink, her aim would have been better?

“She has no previous convictions but has a recent caution for possession of a bladed instrument.”

/facepalm

Richard Prew, defending, said his client could remember little about the incident.

“She has some injuries herself which she can’t explain,” said Mr Prew.

When do we stop wasting police and the court's time with this sort of stuff?

The Poor Kid Has Got Good Reason To Be Terrified Now, Hasn't She?

A schoolgirl has suffered serious injuries after being attacked by a dog in a Birmingham tower block.

The 11-year old was savaged in the communal area of Dunedin House in Welsh House Farm Road, Quinton , at around 8.15am today. Police and ambulance attended and the girl was taken to Birmingham Children’s Hospital after sustaining serious leg and arm injuries.

An investigation has been launched and a dog was taken away by police.

The owners are contrite and apol...

No, wait. They are the victims here!

The owners of a dog which attacked an 11-year-old girl in a Birmingham tower block have insisted the pet is not dangerous - calling it a “real softie”.

Err...

The couple, both aged 24, say they do not want to be named as since the story appeared in the Birmingham Mail they have faced “abuse and horrible comments” online.

The woman, who is 14 weeks pregnant, said: “We live opposite the family of the girl and that morning I opened my door and AV ran between my legs, out onto the landing.

“At the same time the girl was leaving her flat opposite to go to school.

“When the girl saw AV, for some reason she panicked and turned hysterical.

“She started screaming and crying and stamping her feet and this frightened AV who bit her on the arm and the leg.

“AV sensed fear from the girl and did what dogs do in these situations, she got frightened herself and bit the girl.”

If you have a dog who, faced with a screaming child, opts to bite that child, you have a big problem. A bigger one than strangers pointing out you're an idiot dog owner on social media and hurting your feelings...

“She was telling me while we were waiting for the ambulance that she’s always been terrified of dogs.”

Poor bloody kid. Your out of control animal has just turned that irrational fear into a rational one.

Better Late Than Never, #EssexPolice?

Investigating officer Det Con Paul Gutteridge, of Southend CID, said: "This was a nasty incident that left a man with very serious injuries, from which he is still recovering from.

"He was unable to give a description of his attackers, but someone will know what happened and who was involved and I am appealing for anyone with information to please come forward.”

Well, if an attack happens on December 16th, maybe don't wait until a full month later to ask?

After you've closed the case without contacting him and then been shamed by a Facebook campaign into hastily re-opening it?

Just a thought.

It's All Going Down In Hove..!

Yes, that really is the headline...

Strange, The One On The 'Churchill' Ads Doesn't Look Like This...

It is, of course, an English mastiff...

H/T: Stephen Brown via email

Sunday Funnies...

Borneo seems to be making a bid for Australia's crown as home of ghastly things...

'Fake News' Is Now 'Fake Opinion Column'...

Mad as a box of frogs transgender activist Jane Fae is given a column in the 'Guardian' to lambaste the prison service:

One aspect of the story will have sent shivers down the spine of every trans woman reading it: Swift’s friend says the hormones she was taking were abruptly withdrawn when she entered the prison system.

Really? The Prison Service denies you prescription drugs?

Would the prison service care to comment on this? Apparently not: asked a direct question about the issue, it preferred to take refuge in yet more pieties about guidelines...

So, were they hormones prescribed by the NHS or other medical authorities - in which case I agree, this is an outrage - or were they just something this mad old bugger had bought off the internet?

Because I'm pretty sure if it's the latter, we shouldn't be too surprised that the Prison Service stopped him from taking them.

And it's pretty disingenuous to fail to mention their provenance, just so you can work yourself up into a lather of righteous indignation, isn't it?

Hey, At Least They Are Just Asking...

...this time. How long before they demand instead...?

Once upon a time, of course, this would immediately become the story. The agents of the State attempting to silence a fearless warrior of the Fourth Estate. How very dare they!? Let a thousand headlines bloom!

But I guess the reason it didn't get any traction is because all eyes were on the Trump Inauguration. Yes. That must be it. After all, this is just another 'mental health incident'....

Nothing to see here, move along. And put that cameraphone down, citizen!

I Guess 2017 Will Be The Year Of The #Virtuesignaller Again...

The implication being '...but you don't, you tightwads!'

Deborah Robson-Grey, of Welsh Way, Witney, founded Homes4All this winter after seeing people camping out in the town in sub-zero temperatures and learning of many others struggling to find accommodation.

Hmmm, OK....

“I couldn't believe that it was going on in this day and age. I started talking and other people seemed passionate about it straight away.

“We all put suggestions in and realised we didn’t want it to be about a specific group. Everybody should have the right to a roof over their head.

“Before we knew it, about 70 people had sent me private messages offering their support and it just kept exploding.”

How heartwarming! How deserving!

The 49-year-old mum experienced the struggle of finding a property through the council herself in 2016, when she and her 22-year-old daughter tried to find a home in West Oxfordshire.

Following a fall which led to an infection, Ms Robson-Grey had her right leg amputated below the knee, making her housing requirements more specific than most. She and her daughter were moved around several hotels for a series of months before being housed.

Hmmm, I don't see a father/husband mentioned. I wonder why?

Never mind, I'm sure the others are deserving...

Corey Jordan, 22, and Melissa Stratford, 19, are one couple Homes4All is aiming to support, both left with limited options due to difficult relationships with family.

Hmmm....

The pair spent about eight months on the streets last year and are now staying with friends, moving from sofa to sofa.

They have two children – Katie, two, and 10-month-old Skye – who were taken into care, and Miss Stratford is pregnant again.

/facepalm

Mr Jordan said: “Me and Melissa don’t have many friends as it is. We don’t even have family. And it’s reached the point that we’ve asked so many people we’re getting close going back on the streets in the cold.

“We just feel powerless and left behind and it feels like people don’t want to listen. We need things like Homes4All because they help our voices be heard.”

We've heard you. And we think your problems are entirely of your own making.

"Ladies And Gentlemen, The President Of The United States.."

via GIPHY

Sorry, snowflakes, but he is...

So have your little temper tantrums, but remember - this is exactly how you came to have this state of affairs in the first place. Keep it up, and you pretty much guarantee his second term. Now, if you'll excuse me, there's a man at the door wanting me to sign for this pantechnicon full of popcorn.

What A Pity She Ran Over His Leg...

...and not his head:

Michael Bagley, defending, said his client had developmental problems and left school without any qualifications.

He said jobless Wilkinson, who led a “wretched later adolescence”, was set to become a dad in July, but had split up with his girlfriend.

Being Liverpudlian is a 'developmental problem', isn't it?

So, They Do Exist...

A spokesperson for Sussex Police said, “A woman who apparently tried to steal a puppy in Eastbourne was rugby tackled by the dog’s owner as she headed off with the dog in her arms.

“The woman is described as white, aged between 30-35, of chubby build, with dark brown shoulder length hair and wearing a cream puffy coat. She spoke in broken English.”

Well, that should worry the police who previously airily dismissed any such suggestions in their usual fashion, shouldn't it?

Pet Owner Of The Year!

A dog owner whose pet staffie bit him during a stand-off with police has been allowed to keep the animal.

I bet the police are delighted!

How did this all start?

James Armstrong-Holmes, prosecuting, said the large white dog, which was not on a lead, became agitated and started barking when it saw the police.

Kelly said he didn't have a lead and then became agitated himself raising his arms and shouting "You're not touching my dog. Shoot me".

Kelly continued to be aggressive and was holding the dog back as it reared up on its hind legs. Mr Armstrong-Holmes said officers tried to calm the defendant and a dog lead and a muzzle were thrown to him.

Kelly managed to put the muzzle onto the dog but then police drew their tasers because of the level of aggression being shown by Kelly.

The prosecutor said "The dog muzzle came off and the dog bit hard into the defendant's right leg and wouldn't let go. It then bit his right hand before the defendant managed to get the muzzle back on."

Jeez! If only the cops wore bodycam, this would be one for 'You've Been Framed'..!

Kelly ,35, of Nettleton House. Thurlby Crescent, Ermine East, Lincoln, admitted being the owner of a dog dangerously out of control as a result of the incident in Keats Close on 9 March 2014. He was fined £750 and the dog was given a conditional destruction order which means it has to be kept on a lead and have a muzzle on when out in public.

The court was told that Kelly originally also faced charges following the incident in which Joanne McCord and a second woman were bitten at Greetwell Quarry but those matters were not pursued after police received witness statements confirming that the animal in the earlier incident was not Kelly's dog.

That dog has never been traced.

Curiouser and curiouser...

Michael Cranmer-Brown, in mitigation, said that Kelly had been to the quarry earlier in the evening where he smoked cannabis and drank wine with Ms McCord and another friend until the incident which resulted in Ms McCord being badly injured.

He said Kelly found himself confronted by armed police with a police helicopter circling overhead as he headed for Keats Close.

"Mr Kelly accepts that he did not cover himself in glory. He had just gone through the unpleasantness of seeing his partner injured and the next thing he is surrounded by armed police. He regrets his behaviour. He was behaving badly and the dog got caught up in it. As a consequence of his behaviour his dog was taken from him."

Even the usual excuses can't save the day here, can they?

Reader, they apparently can:

Mr Cranmer-Brown said a veterinary expert who examined the dog concluded the it is not dangerous (sic).

He said Kelly wants to be reunited with his dog and now intends to move to Wales to be reunited with Ms McCord.

/facepalm

What's To 'Investigate'..?

The incident happened on Wednesday at Leeds Station, when Paige was heading home from a family day out at the Christmas market.

But a staff member allegedly told the party there was “no room for a wheelchair” despite having pre-booked tickets.

When the party told the staff member Paige could get out of her wheelchair and sit in a normal chair, the family say he told them that wasn’t an option - although the rest of the party could.

Wha...?

But the 19-year-old’s humiliation turned to anger when a friend text her (sic) a picture showing the space reserved for her chair was stuffed with suitcases and Primark bags.

And, of course, it's 'more than my job's worth!' for the staff to remedy this situation the sensible way....

...on Facebook, the train operator said it was “sorry” to hear of the incident.

Commenting on the post it said: “Sorry to hear and apologies to Paige and yourself.

“We recommend a complaint of this nature to go to our Customer Relations team who can investigate this incident.”

Too little, too late. Why not empower your staff to take action to remove the items?

This Is Where '#IBelieveHer' Leads...

A woman has been locked up after she tried to blackmail a police officer she met on a dating website by suggesting he wanted to rape her.

Nightclub waitress Georgia Harris recorded the 22-year-old man as she put a “hypothetical” scenario to him about such a sex attack. She then sent him a “doctored” video clip of part of the conversation with him saying “I would rape you” and her replying “I don’t want you to rape me.”

What on earth might have given this woman the idea that she could do this, and not be punished for it?

Sentencing her to eight months youth custody, a judge said the case was serious because of the “premeditated, determined and persistent” nature of the offence.

“It is well understood for good reason that blackmail offences are to be treated very seriously indeed in terms of penalty,” he added.

Whereas if she'd simply cried rape, she'd have probably been believed, and almost certainly wouldn't have gone to jail if she wasn't believed...

Harris, of Rookes Crescent, Chelmsford, had suffered from depression and anxiety after having a miscarriage at the age of 17.

Ahhhh, poor wee lamb...

Harris, who works at Faces nightclub in Chelmsford, told a probation officer she had a drink problem that was now under control.

Of course she does.

Ed Duncan-Smith, defending, said Harris, who admitted blackmail, had not intended the matter to go as far as it did.

“It snowballed,” he said. “She now realises how unacceptable it was. She expresses a high level of shame for her behaviour.

“She has had a wake up call and taken control of her life. She is having therapy. Her ambition is to be an air hostess. She is remorseful for this very sorry episode.”

All the old excuses. They'd have worked, too, if the offence hadn't been blackmail.

Charity Only Begins At Home If No-One Else Is Paying...

Youngsters who have travelled thousands of miles from their war-torn homelands in Syria, Afghanistan and Iraq are now starting new lives under the protection of the city council.

I think that probably should have been 'youngsters'...

In contrast to the city council’s generosity, up to a quarter of local authorities have refused to take part in the national voluntary scheme complaining about the costs of taking children and young adults into their care.

Booo! Hissss! How uncharitable! Not like saintly Brighton!

City councillors are calling for more resources from Westminster to help the authority meet its commitments.

Westminster doesn't have any 'resources'. It's taxpayer pockets they'll be rummaging around in. As usual.

Errr, Hold On A Mo...

A woman wearing a hijab claims she was racially abused by a thug who spat in her face at a west London chip shop.

Oh, really? Can we see the CCTV?

What, there's none..?

The 46-year-old Government researcher and anti-racism capaigner...

*rolls eyes*

Ms Ashraf, who is part of the organisation Stand Up To Racism, had been visiting the capital from her Manchester home and said the abuse in a multicultural area like London left her horrified.

The poor wee lamb. Can she shoehorn Brexit in here somehow?

Reader, she can...

There was a spike in hate crime in the capital following the Brexit vote (Ed: no, there was a spike in reports of this...), but Ms Ashraf said the problems stemmed from hysteria over the hijab and people blaming social problems like austerity on minority groups.

“I don’t think people overnight became racist in this country,” she said.

“When you look at the figures, it’s more Muslim women rather than Muslim men that are being attacked.

“In any other culture it wouldn’t be acceptable to talk about a woman’s dress – it’s their choice.

But for Muslim women it’s open season. It’s just shocking.”

It is indeed their choice. Or so we are always told.

Police confirmed they were treating the incident, which took place on January 6 at around 9.30pm, as a racially-aggravated hate crime.

Well, that's a very broad definition these days, catching all sorts of people.

But I'm sure they'll soon apprehend this pasty-white, tattooed, Union Flag T-shirt wearing, UKIP voting thug, won't they?

A Scotland Yard spokesman said: “Officers attended but the suspect had already fled the scene, in the direction of Hammersmith Underground Station.

“The suspect is described as a male of Arab appearance, aged in his 30s, about 5ft 9ins tall, with facial hair, balding head and a non-British accent.”

*blinks*

It's Enough To Drive You To Drink!

Peter Clemenson, 47, of Shoebury Road, Southend, was a teacher at South Essex College until 2011 before he moved to the Lower Basildon Academy.

That's....well, not exactly a step up.

The National College for Teaching and Leadership (NCTL) noted how Clemenson picked up his first conviction, for failing to stop at the scene of an accident, in October 2007.

He was also convicted for failing to provide a sample for analysis, resulting in a two year disqualification, a £750 fine and an order to pay £90 costs.

Well, one mistake is understandable, we're all human after ...

Oh.

In September 2012, Clemenson was convicted of drink-driving and banned for three years, and fined £450 with £85 costs and a £15 victim surcharge.

I guess he didn't learn his lesson the first time.

However, it was his conviction in March last year for possession of a knife in a public place on July 15, 2014, that led to a jail sentence of eight weeks, a £500 costs order and an £85 victim surcharge.

Clemenson also received another two weeks, concurrent, because he failed to surrender to bail.

Well, to be fair, Basildon Academy is the sort of place you may want to arm yourself before attending. Pupil or teacher.

The report said Clemenson’s five convictions suggested a “repetitive pattern of behaviour.”

No shit..?

I Think They'd Be Safer If You Didn't, Frankly...

That's a set of loppers..!

H/T: Dave Ward via email

Personally, I Prefer Cream On Mine...

H/T: Stephen Brown via email

Sunday Funnies...

OK, confession time - I bought 'Apocalypse'. Couldn't finish it though!

Neoteny Generation...

"The tree appeared to be stable and I think there were people walking under the tree in front of me. I decided it was probably the optimum route," she said in a statement read to court.

"I walked my dog under first and I followed. It was clearly open."

She added: "I don't recall seeing any officer on my side of the road and no-one tried to stop me from walking under the tree."

Yes, of course, it must have been the fault of the police, and never, ever the people who decided to walk under the tree....

But since they get blamed for it regardless, is it surprising when they overreact?

What A Wonderful Opportunity For Some Virtue Signalling!

Young pupils in Sudbury formed a “walking bus” to urge motorists to drive slower after three children were run-over outside their primary school.

Three children! Gosh!

They formed their walking bus exactly two weeks after two pupils and their toddler brother was hit by a car on November 25 at 3.30pm.

Ah. That's three children in one incident. So, not quite such a black spot as the headline might lead you to think.

The pupils showed their handmade posters with warnings including “Aggressive is not Impressive”, “Slower Speeds = Happy People”, “Slow Down for a Happy Town” and “Do Not Crash Car” to motorists as they drove past.

So we mustn't use mobiles while driving due to the danger of distraction, yet we allow, nay, encourage, the schools to send children out with these sort of posters designed to attract a driver's attention?

I mean, is it me..?

The day was given to a road awareness campaign with two assemblies in the afternoon, to encourage children to encourage their own parents not to drive to school.

Excellent idea!

*boots kids out the front door into the pouring rain* "Sorry, sweetie, but it's what you want, right? Off you go!"

The school is under “requires improvement” following recent troubled history with its previous headteacher.

Mrs Ragheb was brought in to replace Uma Pandya who stood down from the role following her suspension.

Hmmm, if this is considered an improvement, she must have been pretty awful

But back to this accident. How do three kiddies get mown down? On a crossing?

Sharon Samuels, who has a nine-year-old daughter at the school, said: “The cars shouldn’t be sitting on Watford Road. The children weren’t even on the road, they were on the pavement.

An adult with the children was treated at the scene while the driver of the car was taken to a west London hospital. No arrests have been made.

Ah.

Not Named For Nothing...

A man stabbed his 72-year-old sister in the neck and threatened to “slit her throat” after arguing over a new washing machine he had just plumbed in, a court heard.

Robert Patient, 60...

Ooops!

...lost his temper with Valerie Maguire at her home in Central Avenue, Southend, on June 30, moments after coming home from the pub.

I'm shocked, shocked, to hear that alcohol was involved.

When Scum Fall Out...

Mr Linnen said Wood heated up the iron while making threats, before holding it “millimetres” away from his face.

At one point, Wood is alleged to have aimed a double-barrelled shotgun at Mr Linnen’s head from a range of two metres.

Mr Linnen said: “Carl held it in one hand. He said: ‘Where’s your brothers now?’ He said he would kill them. He said if I left and the police turned up at the door he would kill them as well.”

Mr Linnen was allowed to leave at about 4.30am. The following day, he and his brothers Jason, Ricky, Billy, Bradley and Joe returned to the house demanding an explanation.

Because that's what you want when you turn up with your five man posse, an explanation...

Wood, along with two other men, is alleged to have pointed guns out of the window and made threats.

At that point, the Linnens returned home and called the police.

Of course they did.

Officers found no firearms at the property.

What a shocker.

Rag Chand, mitigating for Wood, asked Judge Ian Graham to release him until a sentencing hearing on January 16.

He said: “It is the time of year when most children prefer both their parents to be at home with them.

“Although cocaine and cannabis were being taken downstairs while the children were upstairs, the fact remains that it was not done in front of the children.”

Awww, that makes them saints on Canvey!

However, Judge Ian Graham declined to grant Wood bail. He told the pair: “This was a nasty assault. I am prepared to wait for a pre-sentence report.”

What on earth do you think it's going to tell you that you don't already know?

It Depends On What You Mean By 'Local People'...

Frustrated residents claim Croydon Council will push through its large-scale building plans for the borough.

Of course it will. Did you really think the 'consultation' was a two-way process?

During the consultations between the contracted property developer Brick by Brick and locals, only nine per cent were supportive of the proposals on June 29.

Things got worse after a second round of consultations on August 17 when three per cent of those questioned said they backed the plans.

Wouldn't matter if the number was 'zero'. Your 'elected representatives' are in favour. So it'll happen.

Cllr Newman said: "Brick by Brick is a fantastic scheme that takes control of house-building in Croydon and will provide much needed affordable homes for local people.

"There is a housing shortage across the country, but Croydon residents deserve more than being homeless or stuck in temporary accommodation long term because they are unable to afford to rent or buy.

"It’s sad to think this Christmas there will still be families in Croydon who are without a permanent roof over their heads.

"We as a council are committed to supporting those in need in our borough by making sure we continue to do all that’s within our power to provide affordable homes for local people."

You keep using those terms, 'local people', 'Croydon families'. But what do you really mean?

Healthwatch is calling for a more integrated approach by Croydon Council, NHS providers and local charities to support asylum seekers and refugees arriving in the borough.

Ah. Thought so.

I Think The Term 'Sleeping Policeman'...

...is meant to refer to a bump in the road, isn't it?

A police community support officer faces being reprimanded for allegedly sleeping on the job after he was photographed apparently dozing in cafes and on public transport.

Oh dear, someone's in trouble!

A Met police spokesman said: “Senior officers will discuss the circumstances surrounding these images with the officer when he is next on duty.The Metropolitan Police Service expects all of its employees to always maintain the highest standards.”

'When he's next on duty'..? Well, don't strain yourselves!

Another Waste Of A Life Lived Well...

Anne Tongs, of Eastern Esplanade, Southend, died on June 4 when Chloe Thompson, 19, ploughed into the back of her car while she was in stationary traffic on the M25 near Swanley, Kent.

Thompson, of Carlton Road, Eastbourne, East Sussex, admitted a charge of causing death by dangerous driving at Maidstone Crown Court.

She was driving a Smart FourFour. The dead woman was in a Citroen C4. You can gather from that just how hard the impact must have been...

Anita Bryant, 68, of Shoebury, was a friend of Mrs Tongs, who was a member of the RNLI and used to collect cash for the charity on Southend High Street.

She said: “I had known her for two years and she was a very good friend in that short time.

“We were all part of the same group.

“She had two daughters, one who lives in Billericay and one who lives in Helsinki.

“She was coming back from taking her to the airport when it happened.”

If they don't throw the book at her, there's no justice.

Thompson will appear at the court to be sentenced on February 8. Judge David Griffith-Jones QC order a pre-sentence report from the probation service.

*sighs* I forgot. There's likely no justice.

Quinton Hunt, defending, said the consequences of Thompson’s driving had been “nothing short of tragic”. There had also been profound consequences for her, he added.

Mr Hunt said a psychiatric report in respect of the neurological conditional (sic) the teenager suffered from was being prepared.

That being something that clearly didn't disqualify her from driving a car, so why should it have any bearing on her culpability for the crash?

Three Cheers For Judge David Aubrey QC!

Andrew Blennerhaccett, defending, said the dog had never behaved in a way that caused Nimmo to believe he caused a risk to members of the public. He said Tyson had been a “placid and affectionate family pet.”

But Judge David Aubrey QC asked: “Why was the dog called Tyson? I assume he was called Tyson after the boxer Mike Tyson.

“I would like to know why an affectionate, placid dog was called Tyson. Let’s get real for a moment.”

And yes, it's yet another American Bulldog. A pity that the pussy pass came into play here - her jail sentence should not have been suspended.

Ooooh, Tricky One!

Cheshire Police has now referred the incident to the RSPCA.

A spokesman said: “On the evening of 25 December 2016 police received a report of a dog being injured. On investigation it appeared the dog had attacked another dog and a 58-year-old man. The man received serious injuries to both hands as he tried to get the dog under control and at some point the dog itself was injured.

The dog was treated by a vet and the incident has been referred to the RSPCA.”

Another dangerous dog attack on an unsuspecting family pet? Well, yes.

And...no:

It is understood he was forced to intervene when a Staffordshire Bull Terrier he was fostering attacked his American Staffordshire Terrier.

Well, it's going to be really interesting to see how the RSPCA tackles this one, isn't it? Given their own history with such matters.

Of Course She Knows, We All Know!

A serial fraudster who tricked men on dating websites into sending her thousands of pounds for luxury goods and holidays was...

Ooooh, lemmie guess!

...spared jail.

**sighs

Neelam Desai conned her victims into handing over £56,000 in an online dating scam by pretending to be raising money for homeless children.

The 36-year-old hoodwinked three victims into believing she was a pharmacist, that she did charity work and was able to sell cheap holidays and Apple products.

Hang on! Doesn't that name....ring a bell?

Judge Charles said: "Those offences were committed over a period between December 12 and April 14.

"This case is so serious that only a custody sentence can be justified and the only sentence in this case is one of two years.

"It will be two years imprisonment suspended for two years.

"You will also do 120 community work. (sic)

"If you breach my order you will be coming back to this court and you will go straight to prison."

Yeah, yeah...

Susan Meek, representing Desai, said: "The bottom line is she committed fraud against three men and took money from them and she has to be prosecuted for that.

"Whether she needs to be returned to prison or not is something your honour has to decide.

"Since her release in April 2015 it has been very difficult for her and in many respects it will simply be poor punishment for her, she knows she has been a fraudster.

"She went off the rails when her father died and she met a man and got married and committed the fraud for him.

"She has not offended since she was released.

"She is working and willing to pay compensation orders, she fully admits we guilt (sic).

"She had a bag, she can go back to prison and wants me to beg you not to do that."

What does it take...?

What Am I Missing Here..?

Detective Constable Katrina Walmsley, of Thames Valley Police, said: "The group cowardly attacked the victim from behind and then continued to assault him as he lay on the ground and tried to get up.

"The offenders are between about nine years old to about 15 years old. Unfortunately there are no other descriptions of the offenders at this time but I am confident that someone knows who they are."

So are they short, tall, fat, thin? How can their ages be estimated, yet with no other description given?

"We Want It Handed To Us On A Plate..."

Surrey Police has said it is not investigating unless a name and address of the dog owner is provided, Mr Walker said.

You have pictures, FFS!

Maybe Mr Walker should have had a horse instead? Or perhaps lived in Kent, where it seems the police there do understand what their role is supposed to be...

He added: “It’s very dangerous. If it has been a child, a child could have been badly hurt and her [the owner] behaviour seems to be outside the parameters of normal human behaviour. She didn’t apologise and was utterly indifferent.

“If anything, she was relaxed, even amused at Truffle’s agony – his howling and shaking. At the time, I assumed her apparent amusement was a perverse reaction to what had happened, that she was shocked. Looking back, I’m not so sure.”

The owners of these creatures are often criminal scum - wouldn't it be terribly sad if the police called at her house one day and were bitten...?

Mr Walker wants to warn other dog walkers in the area to be careful, and says he has heard of similar attacks occurring there.

Anyone who knows anything about the attack should contact police on 101.

What on earth for? They clearly can't be arsed to do the basics of their job.

Standards Are Slipping Everywhere...

Does no-one proofread anything anymore..?

H/T: Dave Ward via email

I Wonder What Calibre Is Recommended...

...for an oyster? And is it stand hunted, driven, or stalk and shoot?

Sunday Funnies..

I didn't get past No 1 without screaming and closing the browser quickly!

Collective Punishment Is The Only Type We Have Left...

The Organic Kitchen describes itself as the “home of healthy artisan fine foods and drink”. Dishes include avocado on rye for £7.50 and children’s menu features quinoa and mushroom balls with organic baked beans for £5.

Yeah, I know what you're thinking...

But it seems even the progressives are drawing a line in the sand for once:

Hilary Penning, who runs the Organic Kitchen in Buckhurst Hill, has a two-year-old son and is unrepentant about her decision, which she announced by posting a sign on the door.

She said: “There’s been far too many instances where mums come in with newborn babies and allow the children to cry and cry. Some parents have come in for up to two hours with their children crying.

“It’s been a hard and challenging decision but I think I made the right choice. I cannot allow people to come in expecting to have a great eating experience but have to leave because their lunch or breakfast has been ruined by inconsiderate parents allowing their children to run riot, which has happened quite a bit.”

Naturally, this didn't go down well with her customers, who don't recognise themselves in this, because oh, no, it's never their children, is it?

Karen Sticher, 39, was one of the first to share the image of the sign on social media. Ms Sticher, chief executive of business management firm Elite Training and a mother of two, said: “It’s discrimination because anyone with an under-five is not allowed in.

Yup! Because we can't judge people any more, we have to have a blanket ban.

“They are excluding people based on age. In this day and age I’m amazed they want to discriminate against people who just want to have a coffee.It’s not a fancy bar or restaurant, it’s a cafe and it’s right next to a school. It’s the only one open when the older children are dropped off and mums want a coffee. I want this business to be successful but I feel this is a poor decision.”

Welcome to the world you and yours created. Don't like it much? Awwww. Poor you.

Ellie Hart-Spratt, 39, who has a daughter aged two, said: “I can see things from both sides. The stupid part was the way the ban was advertised with a sign. The big picture of the baby was awful. Even if the policy changes to allow young children, I think the way it has been done has annoyed so many people.

“There’s a lot of money in this area with mums and I do think the business will feel the effects of it.”

Maybe. Maybe not.

Another mother, who gave her name only as Annabel, said: “It’s very disappointing. I take my daughter who is three there all the time but I won’t be able to any more.

“They’re really shooting themselves in the foot because there are three independent schools and two state schools in the street so there are definitely more customers with children than without.”

We'll see. If you're right, it'll go bust. But what if you're wrong?

What if the new clientele, who flock to a cafe they know won't be overrun by screaming brats while yummy mummy Facebooks over a latte, actually make it a success?

One to watch.

Isn't This A Bit Like...

...killing your parents then complaining you're an orphan?

Two residential homes for troubled children in Gloucestershire have been closed after staff were reduced to locking themselves in an office for their own safety and police said that the situation at one home was "out of control and dangerous".

Animals.

"All the young people living at the home told the inspector they felt scared and did not feel safe," said the Ofsted report for home A which was littered with shards of glass and graffiti when the inspectors came to carry out an interim inspection.

Err....

The Ofsted inspector, who had criticised the lack of a homely, family atmosphere, added: "The staff lack the de-escalation skills to manage incidents safely.

"For example, highly dangerous behaviours by young people, including smashing most of the windows at the home, climbing onto the roof and using roof tiles as missiles, physically assaulting staff, causing extensive damage to the home and subjecting another young person to bullying, were not managed by staff and resulted in police intervention."

Yes, well, calling the police is a natural response to this sort of behaviour. What else are the staff to do, since their hands are tied?

Some say the disruption from neighbouring Marlowe properties has turned their dreams of living in the country into a nightmare.

"I'm 68 and my husband's 72 and at our age we shouldn't have to put up with this kind of thing in our own home," said one.

"They call us NIMBYs and ask what we want them to do with these children, we don't know.

"But I don't want to be sitting in my house on a dark night listening to it all kicking off and worrying what would happen if they decided to come over here and do the same. They could easily say 'let's go down the road' and what would we do then. People on a sink estate would not have to put up with this."

My feelings of sympathy are tempered slightly, by the evident fact this is a little colony of SJWs...

Another said she had seen a member of staff being beaten up, a female carer dragged along the road by her hair and what she describes as a full blown riot when 11 police cars and ambulances turned up. She says she has even witnessed armed police but blames the company rather than the children.

Wha..?

"The staff don't seem to set boundaries or tackle them before it escalates. They tell us they can't intervene but surely they are trained in restraint techniques.

"I was told the staff aren't allowed to call the police because they don't want to criminalise the children, but that means they don't know the boundaries. What will happen when they go out into society? I feel sorry for the children. This is not therapeutic care, it's containment. It's heartbreaking."

Good grief, these people are deranged, and their namby-pamby attitudes have lead precisely to this situation!

Lambs To The Slaughter...

The area he's talking about? Stratford.

Do the people who flock to live in these new builds only ever look at the glossy brochure the estate agent shows them? Do they never look around the area, read the local paper?

Don't Strain Yourselves, Officers...

A woman was let off with a police caution after her out-of-control Rottweiler savaged a poodle and bit a man on his hands.

What?

Courier Craig Kitchen, 36, who lives on Canvey, said he was delivering a parcel near Christchurch Park when he noticed a Rottweiler trying to push through the gate to get at two poodles being walked by a woman in her 60s.

He said: “It managed to push the gate open and charged out at some speed. It grabbed one of the poodles and swung it around like a killer whale with a seal pup.

“A couple of guys came running over and tried to do everything they could to get it off. They were punching and kicking it and one guy had his hands in its mouth. The dog left him with wounds on both his hands.

“From what I could see, the poodle had lost about 20 per cent of its flesh from its back, you couldn’t see any skin or fur, it was just raw.

“The owner was screaming. The poor woman had obviously just decided to take her dogs for a walk but it turned into something from a horror film.”

Well, maybe the police gave the woman credit for her actions in trying to prevent the...

Oh.

Mr Kitchen said the owner of the Rottweiler made no effort to get her dog off the poodle and tried to walk away after the attack.

He said: “She acted as if nothing had happened. When it started happening she just strolled over casually, she was in no rush to get her animal off the other one.

“If people have these dogs then they have to be able to control them. She should be taken to court and given a custodial.”

She should be. But, luckily for her, she lives within the jurisdiction of the fabulously incompetent Essex Police farce...

An Essex Police spokesman said : “A woman in her 50s has been given a police caution after a man was bitten by a dog in Southend.

“Officers were called to Christchurch Road at about 11am Monday after reports a man had been bitten.

“Witnesses stated the man had been injured trying to separate to dogs (sic).

“He suffered a cut to his hand."

I think that's called 'a bite'.

When You Play The Game Of Identity Politics, You Lose, Or You Lose...

...because no matter what you do, you'll never ever win:

Mourners held a vigil for Yassar Yaqub at junction 24 of the M62 this evening, 24 hours after protesters in Bradford damaged a police car and brought a road to a standstill demonstrating against his shooting.

Why were they allowed to do this? Why do the police routinely allow the vocal criminal minority to disrupt the lives of the long-suffering majority in this way?

It makes no sense. It won't 'relieve tension' or 'calm the community', it just cements in the minds of these people that they can do what they like as they are above the law, and in the minds of the majority that the police are afraid to act against an 'identity group'.

It emboldens the scum and pisses off those natural defenders of the police. It is the very definition of a 'lose/lose' situation.

"Because Only Other People Need To Take Care!"

Cars, taxis and lorries will be banned from one of London’s most notorious junctions in a ground-breaking road safety measure to start in April.

Well, I suppose it's one answer. It's an utterly stupid one, mind you...

It comes after Cambridge graduate Ying Tao, 26, died after being hit by a turning HGV as she cycled through the junction on her way to work in June 2015.

And what were the circumstances?

Other witnesses told how she ‘struggled to get momentum’ when trying to start moving, and that neither the lorry nor a taxi behind it were indicating left as they waited for the lights to change.

Witness Ian Hamilton said: ‘Given the congestion that morning, the lorry was quick away from the lights. Given the number of cyclists there, it wouldn’t have hurt to have held back slightly.’

It wouldn't have hurt her to do so either. Would it?

Trevor Merralls, of the United Cabbies Group, said he they (sic) would fight the plan “every inch of the way.”

I wish them the best of luck. Because this is the future, unless these idiots are stopped from demanding all other vehicles are subordinate to them...

What Was The Point?

Charlotte Nickson’s beloved Labrador, Layla, was left shaking with fear and covered in cuts after the attack outside Sainsbury’s in Coventry city centre.

Not a pet dog this time. Layla's a working dog, and that special provision leaps into play.

The owner of the other dog pleaded guilty to being in charge of a dangerous dog which caused injury to an assistance dog.

You see, there's a special provision because attacks on guide dogs are considered extra heinous. Now, I don't much agree with this, but at least it means that justice will be d....

Oh, FFS!

Brian Devoisey, 30, of Ridgethorpe, Willenhall, was fined just £45, as well as having to pay £100 compensation to Charlotte, who is partially sighted mainly due to albinism, and £50 court costs.

The maximum sentence for the offence is three years in prison on top of a fine and/or compensation. Courts also have the power to disqualify owners from keeping dogs.

Then start using it!

Sod Protecting Him...!

Sgt Ash Holland said the order is the fifth obtained against drug dealers convicted in Southend, but the first against one who was not sent to prison.

He said: “If we can prevent drug dealers from putting themselves in the circumstances that they need to deal drugs and make it as hard as possible then the hope is they will be dissuaded from that life of crime.

“People see policing as just locking people up, but Aidon Pearce is a young man and by obtaining this CBO we can prevent reoffending.

“Hopefully this will protect him from people who do get themselves into these situations.

“If he does break the order, it is a criminal offence and he will be back in court and most likely go to prison.”

Remember when the police considered criminals to be criminals, and not poor misguided youths in need of help..?

How Utterly, Depressingly, Appropriate...

Meanwhile, in Southend:

Reigan Knight and Liam Phillips died after the car they were travelling in hit a BMW and then a wall at the junction of Southsea Avenue and Glendale Gardens, in Leigh, in the early hours of Tuesday morning.

Friends and family organised the ‘send-off’ event at Bell Wharf beach in Leigh on Thursday night, which saw about 300 people turn up to set off fireworks and lanterns.

Of course they did. What better way to commemorate two senseless, utterly avoidable, squalid deaths than the chance to maim or kill innocent bystanders..?

Reading Between The Lines...

Another day, another fatal stabbing in London...

Tributes to Mr Kalawa, known as Alex or Robo, have flooded in on social media...

Hmmm....

One friend said: “He was positive, energetic, and loved. His energy would rub on to you if he was here.

“He was good at football. He was business-minded, he was motivated to come out of this situation. It’s very sad. Maybe some people deserve this, but not him.”

What 'situation'..?

Another friend, who said Mr Kalawa had studied at Westminster City School, said: “He was a serious guy. He was very loving, he was happy. But he wasn’t really someone to play with at the same time – he was serious about life. ”

Hmmmm. Again....

A 23-year-old man arrested on suspicion of murder has been bailed to a date in April.

One to watch.

The Honours System Is Becoming A Sick Joke

Former Redcar Labour MP and now Northumbria Police and Crime Commissioner, Vera Baird was made a Dame for her services to women and equality...

You couldn't make it up, could you?

Ms Baird, 66, originally from Oldham, Lancashire, and who now lives in Newcastle, said: “This was very delightful and surprising news.

“I am particularly pleased that the award specifically refers to services to the cause of women and equality, recognising that gender equality is desirable for the country and for everyone in it.

“There have been great advances, but there is still more to do.

“It is important we also continue addressing other forms of equality, across race, religion, sexual orientation, disability and the other protected strands in the Equality Act 2010, which I helped to take through Parliament, as solicitor-general.”

Truly, she represents everything that is wrong about this country.

Her PCC website states that, Ms Baird, who was widowed in 1979, her interests include travel, reading, running, and Poppy, her rehomed Bedlington Terrier.

Perhaps the Queen would like to pop the award in this to hand it to her?

Maybe Next Time Ask The Terrorism Squad About Timers...

Gloucestershire police have broken into the former home of Hannah Henry and Alistair Walker, who are set to stand trial next year after their three-month-old son Ah'Keil died in July.

Nice #chavname. Poor kid was doomed from christening...

Police confirmed officers broke into the house after neighbours had reported seeing a light on.

They found the house unoccupied and owners Gloucester City Homes were advised to board up the property.

The door of the home shows clear damage from the officers hitting it with the metal ram.

How can lights come on with no-one there? Why., it's like magic, or something...