Happy New Year All!

And here's to 2023! It can't possibly be worse than 2022...can it? But then I recall I asked that question last year!

Maybe I shouldn't tempt fate... 

Normal service will resume on Tuesday.

Absent Friends...

As we begin the countdown to say a grateful farewell to the complete disaster that was 2022 (and who thought it could be worse than 2021?) and welcome in a new year, please raise a glass with me to those we have lost:

Raedwald

Captain Ranty (Blog now sadly gone dark)

Unenlightened Commentary

Anna Raccoon

Dracunculus

Bystander, a sad loss to the world of profession-blogging.

Peter Risdon

Gone, but not forgotten.

Tweet Of The Month

I normally do humour or snark, but this time, there's only one possible contender: 

And he's not done with fakecharities, so one to follow in 2023!

Post Title Of The Month

A welcome return to blogging for Macheath, who has a historical solution for Harry and Meghan:

Quote Of The Month

Fahrenheit211 on the sad demise of the 'Guardian' as a newspaper of repute:

"Instead they cleaved to the cult of trans and treated as Holy Writ the dangerous and fact light pronouncements of the promoters of gender ideology. By doing so the Guardian management took a once great newspaper and sold its soul to a cult in order to be able to virtue signal their ‘niceness’. They had the story of the decade under their noses but ignored it because trans groups basically told them to do so. If the Guardian survives in its present form then maybe future media historians will point to the Guardian’s embrace of the cult of trans with the same level of criticism that is today reserved for those Western journalists who in the 1920’s and 1930’s became apologists and mouthpieces for Joseph Stalin."

Post Of The Month

DumbJon shoots, he scores (unlike Harry Kane)!

Not Just The Mutts That Were Inbred...

How do you do this and not face an attempted murder charge?

Breeder Hayley Stoker, 48, was stabbed in the throat on her doorstep on August 22 in 'revenge' after being blamed by the heartbroken couple for the death of their puppy.

In her interview, Rees said they were angry that the puppies were 'inbred' and her feelings had then 'boiled over'. Georgia Donoghue, prosecuting, said: 'The dog breeder told the couple the puppy had been healthy when she sold it.'

They bought three of these things - for £2,450! We aren't told what high-flying jobs they have that they can afford it, strangely enough.

It is unclear which puppy died, but Rees claimed the two other puppies were later put down.

'Claimed'..? Did no-one check? Surely someone did?

Kingston pleaded guilty to conspiracy to commit grievous bodily harm with intent, inflicting grievous bodily harm with intent, and possession of a bladed article.

Rees also pleaded guilty to conspiracy to commit grievous bodily harm with intent, making threats to kill, and possession of bladed articles.

Why is it not attempted murder? You stab someone in the throat and can't claim anything other than a desire to kill then, can you?  

She has 15 previous convictions for 33 offences including multiple batteries, common assaults, and assaults on police officers.

*sighs* 

John Allchurch, for Kingston, said though the defendant had not expressed any remorse during interview they were his instructions that his client was now expressing such a sentiment.

*rolls eyes* Sure, sure...

Andrew Evans, for Rees, accepted the pre-sentence report on his client made "disturbing reading". He said the defendant had grown up in care from the age of three, and later turned to drink and drugs as a result of "traumatic experiences" in childhood. He said Rees was an intelligent young lady and was seeking answers to explain why she had lived her life in the way she had so far.

Ha ha ha ha ha!  

The Guardian: "Fantasy Violence? Yes Please!"

But only if it's the ladies, right?

...in her introductory scene, taking care of drunk punters who get aggressively handsy with a waitress, by stabbing them in the legs and smashing their faces on tables, before continuing to play her bowed zither thingy and sing about people power. We like her immediately.

Grrrl power, eh?

...meanwhile, a young princess called Merwyn (Mirren Mack) is undergoing an awkward coming of age. She feels she is bound for greatness, but to realise her destiny she will have to navigate a court full of men bent on assuming absolute power and wielding it nefariously. What will she need to do to survive, and will she make anything better if she does?

The 'Guardian' - always and forever proving the point that if all you have is a hammer, everything looks like a nail... 

The show's quite good, actually, for all it got roasted by critics. At four episodes, it doesn't outstay its welcome.

Schadenfruede Is Such A Lovely Word, Isn't It..?

They should teach it in schools!

Pardon me while I rummage around in the image files. Ah, here it is!

Would That Have Helped?

The hearing also heard that she had not been given enough “control and restraint” training and was not provided with a PPE helmet.

I'm not sure any amount of training would help a 54 year old woman subdue a 28 year old deranged man...

He said that Ms Barwell was not aware of Burke’s previous violent outbursts despite Serco having access to this information.

“No-one told her or gave her any indication that this was a man who could lash out for any reason and that you could not read him or know how he would react and that is certainly what happened here,” Mr Menzies said.

Do you have to inform zookeepers that the tiger they are caring for could lunge at any moment? No, of course not - you're expected to understand it's a dangerous anumal. 

Why is it different for Serco employees?

The Last 'YCMIU' Of 2022..?

An official working for the UK Border Force has been arrested on suspicion of...

Shirking his duties? Stealing paperclips? 

...being an illegal migrant himself.

*blinks* 

His bosses are understood to have acted quickly as soon as doubts were raised about his status, The Sun reports.

Oh, maybe he's one of those new hires, then? At least they found out before he could do any dam... 

The suspect is understood to be in his late 30s and arrived in the UK around 20 years ago from the Balkans. It is alleged he lied on paperwork about his origins in order to be granted the right to remain in the UK, later going on to work for the Home Office.

/facepalm 

The same man is also believed to be among four Border Force staff who were arrested over a separate incident on December 6. The four were detained on suspicion of misconduct in public office and conspiracy to steal.

Could the BF strike for another few months? I don't think the country can cope with them on duty. 

Let's Have Another Round Of 'Guess The Redacted Word'...

...because it's such fun! But this one's easy, it must be 'celebrating', right?

A Norfolk MP who has been a prominent campaigner for better rural mobile phone coverage is objecting to plans for a new telecoms mast in his constituency.

Duncan Baker, the North Norfolk MP, is supporting locals who are opposed to proposals for a 30m high lattice tower on Thwaite Common, Erpingham.

Oh. Errr, why? 

...he believes the Erpingham scheme should be scrapped, arguing the mast should not be “slap bang” in the middle of the countryside. 

Where else are they supposed to put it then? 

He said: “The parish council and community want better communications, but we cannot erect this mast in such an insensitive and beautiful area in a conservation zone.

“Thwaite Common is clearly an important wildlife area and this mast is wholly unsuitable for this location.”

Hey, here's an idea, maybe the telecommunications people actually know where it's best to site the equipment? Just a thought...

H/T: Dave Ward via email

Says It All, Doesn't It?

Would it? Why are the AA vacating, then?

As previously reported, Fanum House is to be put on the market after the AA has decided the 47-year-old building no longer meets its needs for a modern work environment.

Sounds about right. It's not like modern universities prepare anyone for the world of work, after all, as a glance at David Thompson's blog will tell you... 

H/T: IanJ via email

Gives You A Good Idea Of Who Owns These Beasts, Doesn't It?

A former boxing champ has put up a reward to catch the criminals behind a vandal attack at a vets’ practice he owns. Barrie McRorie has published CCTV photos of a suspect who smashed the windows of the Yes Vets premises in Wishaw, which sources claim is the target of a vendetta by an underworld gang.

What? An underworld attack on a vet's practice..? 

Did Johnny 'The The Hat' McGregor's wife's Pekingese not recover from mange, or something? 

It is not known why crooks would home in on the new shop, which has been well received by locals.

Well, quite! Are there, perhaps, any clues? 

He has had past dealings with designer breeds like American Bullies. Owners of many of these dogs, which can cost up to £10,000, have had their ears cropped, which is illegal in the UK.

But McRorie claims he is now more interested in traditional vet work, treating pet dogs, cats, hamsters and other small animals. McRorie said: “It definitely looks targeted and I don’t know if it’s some kind of rivalry or a warning.”

Ah. 

Tell Us Again How It's A Harmless Recreational Drug...

Linse, from Alderley Edge, Cheshire, who had been ‘self-medicating with cannabis’, faced a charge of attempted murder on his father. But his guilty plea to causing grievous bodily harm with intent was accepted and he admitted common assault on his mother.

They are in their eighties.  

After psychiatrists concluded he had had ‘manic psychosis’ at the time, the judge sentenced him to be kept in a secure facility until doctors deem him safe to be released.

How....reassuring! 

Linse had a previous conviction from 2019 after he battered his wife with a shoe and their two-year-old daughter’s Peppa Pig book. She described a history of domestic violence and said that he blamed his rage on being unable to ‘deal with his emotions’ due to his traumatic school days.

What a pathetic specimen. 

And If Anyone Should Be Able To Recognise A PR Stunt When They See One...

...it's these two!

...on Saturday, a spokesperson for the Sussexes said Meghan had not been contacted by the newspaper to apologise.

“A true apology would be a shift in their coverage and ethical standards for all. Unfortunately, we’re not holding our breath.”

Oh, please do! 

"It's Beginning To Look A Lot Like...."

Fill in the blank:

There have been reports of a serious incident at a holiday park in Devon overnight which has forced families to leave the site on Christmas Day.

A spokesperson for Devon and Cornwall Police couldn't discose full details at this stage but could confirm there was an incident and that officers remained at the site this morning.

Hmmm, why so close-mothed? To social media! 

I noticed trouble brewing yesterday (Christmas Eve) afternoon when I walked to the local shop where the store assistant said lads had been in and out stealing. They were very intimidating. Some stolen items even fell out of one lad’s pockets in the shop - but he refused to pay for them.

Some people just do as they likey, don't they..? 

"Happy Christmas to all, and to all a good night!"

Normal service will resume on Boxing Day! When we remember the most glorious festive tradition of all...

Oh, Florida Man...

...how can you ever top this...?! 

No, wait. That wasn't a challenge for Christmas 2023!

Scrooge Is Alive And Well And Living In...Basingstoke?

Is the cop car there in case someone tries to steal it?

Basingstoke and Deane Borough Council said the tree was chosen for its shape and size to ensure it did not impede CCTV views so that visitors and residents were safe.

Well, that's a pretty inventive excuse, I'll give 'em that! 

H/T: Ian J via email

The Twelve Tweets Of Christmas - Day Twelve

Yes. It IS a Christmas movie!

Is This Headline News Because It's So Rare?

The probation officer who judged Damien Bendall, who has been jailed for life for murdering three children and his pregnant partner, to be “medium” rather than “high risk” has reportedly been sacked for gross misconduct.

Because this sort of action to remove civil servants and local authority staff who screw up usually takes place months and months after the trial, if indeed it ever happens at all... 

The chief inspector of probation has been asked to carry out a full review of the case by the Ministry of Justice. It is believed the report will be published in the new year.

Any signs they are preparing their excuses already? 

Sources within the probation service told the Telegraph that the officer who compiled the pre-sentence report failed to access all the available background information on Bendall. Details are entered on to the Offender Assessment System (Oasys), which calculates an offender’s risk. It can take up to eight or nine hours to carry out.

A source within the probation service said: “The risk assessment came out lower than it should have been. He should have been flagged as ‘high risk of harm’ but he was graded ‘medium risk’ instead. As a result, he was allocated to a trainee – it wouldn’t have happened if he’d been ‘high risk’.”

Aha! It was all the fault of the computer! 

The Only Time You'll See This Term In Close Proximity To The Words 'Border Force'...

Steve Dann, Border Force chief operating officer, said travellers should be prepared for disruption.

He said the military personnel and civil servants, "many of whom are sacrificing their Christmases", will "not be able to operate with the same efficiency as our permanent workforce".

They could hardly do worse, could they?

The Twelve Tweets Of Christmas - Day Eleven

Oh, Look! Another One!

I think we know by now we'll find the answers in the article, don't we, Reader?

Asake is a breakout star in the Afrobeats genre of upbeat West African pop music. Before his first London gig, on Sunday, December 11, the singer used Twitter to warn fans: ‘Please do not come to the Brixton Academy tonight if you do not have a valid ticket.’

Shanice Choi, who was at Thursday’s concert, told the MyLondon news website that she believes many ticketless fans decided to turn up after hearing rumours that the doors wouldn’t be properly guarded.

‘People are trying to force their way to Asake tonight,’ says one of hundreds of posts that begin to appear on TikTok and Twitter. ‘Why are people behaving like animals?’ asks a second.

A mob breaks through doors to the main auditorium, while about a dozen security guards try to maintain order.

...in the unfolding chaos, clashes develop between fans and the police. One officer allegedly throws a woman down the entrance steps after an altercation in its foyer, in circumstances that are now the subject of an official review. A woman outside walks up to a male officer and punches him in the face. There is one arrest.

It's really deja vu all over again, isn't it? 

A Question That's Easily Answered...

Great question, 'Mail' headline writer. Any clues in your article?

...despite his 'controlling and abusing' behaviour, smitten Terry declared she wanted to marry him and have his child...

The jobless ex con and drug addict didn't work...

...had a string of prior convictions including arson, robbery and attempted robbery dating back a decade.

Oh. Just the usual ones then? 

The Twelve Tweets Of Christmas - Day Ten

I Don't Normally Recommend New Laws And Legislation...

It was only after the attack that they discovered the dog had a violent history with his previous owner, and now the couple say they want better regulation for rehomed animals.

"When a dog has viciously attacked a human being, that has to be information given to anybody that's going to rehome that dog," Mrs Maidment said.

...but I can't see any reason not to support this. 

And I can't see why it's not already law. I mean, we already have legislation preventing charity shops 'rehoming' furniture that lack current fire regulation approval, don't we?

Beverley Cuddy, the editor of Dogs Today magazine, said animal rescue currently lacks legislation. "It's pretty unregulated" she said.

"Maybe there is a need for some sort of licensing or oversight.

"At the moment it can be anything from a registered charity to someone who's just got a laptop and thought 'I'm going to rescue some dogs'."

Yes, 'buyer' beware, and all that. But if we can impose legislation to prevent dangerous fires, why can't we impose it to prevent dangerous dogs? 

Resources Aren't The Whole Issue...

Assistant chief const. Nikki Leaper said 'Resources shortage is an issue for us,' she told the inquest.

'Cornwall is a great place to live and since Covid the number of staycations has gone up which has increased the challenges that we face. I don't have a magic wand in term of budgeting for the increased demand in the summer months.'

You could always use the resources that you do have more efficiently? 

The Twelve Tweets Of Christmas - Day Nine

Yes, This Is 'Worrying'...

The office of Republican Texas attorney general Ken Paxton this summer sought data on how many people had changed the gender information on their driver’s licenses, according to a newspaper report published on Wednesday that civil rights attorneys described as worrying.

A DPS spokesperson told the Post that no data was ultimately handed over because it could not be accurately produced.

The DPS found over 16,000 gender changes over the past two years, but officials said a manual search would have been required to determine the reason for each one.

...it's worrying that government officials cannot produce accurate figures when it's presumably what they are paid to do. That's what you meant, right?

Brian Klosterboer, an attorney at the ACLU of Texas, said this request of information was “highly unusual“ and a violation of privacy.

“We suspect that this kind of data inquiry is an attempt to create information to further restrict and curtail the rights of transgender people living in Texas,” Klosterboer told the Associated Press.

As a famous fictional attorney once said, it doesn't matter what you think. What matters is what you can prove... 

A Judge With Common Sense?

A convicted criminal left a woman bleeding from the face after a dog attack because he was under police curfew. Jamie Cassidy appeared at Liverpool Magistrates' Court after a woman was viciously savaged by his dog.

I wonder what sort of dog? 

The XL Bully was being walked on the lead by convicted criminal Cassidy when it suddenly jumped up and attacked the woman.

Oh. I really should have guessed... 

Cassidy, on licence from prison, did not check on her injuries as he only had four minutes to get to his nearby home because he was under a curfew with an electronic tag. Judge District Hatton told the 27-year-old that he had just been trying to "save your own skin".

He was apparently buying baby milk. was there a baby in the house with this brute? 

Cassidy told the judge he was sorry. But the judge told him: "You say you have expressed remorse, that remorse I do not accept as genuine."

Blimey, you could knock me down with a feather! 

Cassidy was jailed for eight months after pleading guilty to being the owner of a dangerously out of control dog which caused injury.

Judge Hatton ordered the destruction of the dog and banned Cassidy from owning a dog for ten years.

Pity he couldn't order the destruction of both worthless vicious animals... 

The Twelve Tweets Of Christmas - Day Eight

No, WMP, You're Doing That Yourselves...

A policewoman who made up a story about transphobia in the workplace during a job interview for a promotion has been found guilty of gross misconduct.

Disgraced Sergeant Sarah Srivastava was given a final written warning after she lied that colleagues had discriminated against a transgender officer and that she had stepped in to challenge their behaviour.

During the misconduct hearing, the counsel for the West Midlands Police condemned Srivastava for bringing ‘discredit to the police service’ and for undermining ‘public confidence’ in the force.

...by not sacking her.

Ho Hum...

A teenager who was found with a "large machete" in a city centre road has been handed...

The full and maximum penalty, she says, hopefully? Just for once?  

...a suspended sentence.

*sighs* What's the point, Reader? 

The Twelve Tweets Of Christmas - Day Seven

The Words May Need Some Rearranging...

I wouldn't argue if someone wielding a knife wanted me to shut up!

H/T: Peter Wells via email

Do You Need A Calendar For Christmas, 'Mail' Editor..?

Because 'next summer' is 2023...

Sunday Funnies...

 I can't say I've ever liked him much, even at Christmas...

The Twelve Tweets Of Christmas - Day Six

No Surprises...

Remember this...? Turned out not to be a Labrador again. Imagine my shock!

Officers attended, including specially trained firearms officers, alongside paramedics from the Welsh Ambulance Service, an 83-year-old woman was taken to hospital with life threatening injuries, where she remains.

Gwent Police said that the dog, a large black XL bully cross cane corso breed, was seized by officers and has been destroyed. No other animals were involved in the attack.

Why send armed officers and not let them do what they are paid to do, and resolve the issue then and there? 

Four people have been arrested on suspicion of being in charge of a dog dangerously out of control causing injury. The people arrested are a 20-year-old man, 25-year-old man, 31-year-old man, and a 28-year-old woman, all from the Caerphilly area.

They have all been released under conditional bail.

Wonder if they will ever face charges? 

Detective Chief Inspector Matthew Sedgebeer said: 'Officers will be making further enquiries as the investigation progresses.

'It is possible that you may see ongoing police activity in Caerphilly as part of this work, but please do not be alarmed.

He added: 'If you have concerns or any information regarding this dog and its previous behaviour then please do stop and talk with us. '

Wonder if this animal has a local history of concerning incidents like all the others? And if previous reports have gone unactioned... 

The Hierarchy Of Fun, According To The Met Police...

Dancing at Carnival? Fine! Shows you're part of the 'community'...

The 34-year-old, who was drafted in from Kingston for Carnival, said he had been told by commanders to “engage” with revellers at the event - but when it came to it he started dancing spontaneously.

“It was a spur of the moment thing. I was told to go and engage so I took it upon myself to do this,” he said.

Having a snowball fight? Not on! Shows you're 'unprofessional'...

Six police officers have had a chilly reception — for starting a snowball fight. They were filmed in a park by staff at a church — but they were later reported to bosses.

The Met said:“The video was filmed near to Stoke Newington Police Station and the officers are thought to have been on a break.

“Officers are allowed downtime but have been reminded of the importance of acting professionally while in uniform.”

*rolls eyes* 

The Twelve Tweets Of Christmas - Day Five

Let's Play 'Guess The Redacted Word' Again...

Is it 'violent'? 'Drugged'? 'Animalistic'?

An early morning shopper was accosted by a "traumatised" woman who robbed her of £200 cash she had in her hand. 

Oh...wait, what? 

Victoria Lamballe, defending, explained that Duffy had had to leave the area after an arson attack on her Hemlington home a month before: "She lost priceless articles. She was speculating as to who started the fire. The fire was obviously heavily on her mind at the time."

The court heard that Duffy was unable to access her normal medication after she moved house and doctors, and that this, "resulted in an inevitable decline. She was under the influence of drugs at the time of the offence."

I'm guessing they weren't the prescription type? 

Duffy, of Littondale, Hemlington in Middlesbrough, pleaded guilty to robbery. She has 16 previous convictions for 27 offences, which include theft and assault.

Well, at least that should see her locked up for y...

Oh, wait. I'm dreaming, aren't I? 

Judge Howard Crowson told her: "The lady went to the cashpoint and came out of the shop. You felt - though there's no good evidence - that her husband had caused you great harm.

"There was a tug of war over the money. You bit her and it was a robbery. Seldom in a case like this, can I consider a suspended sentence. But your reports show that a good deal of your behaviour is motivated by trauma in your own life. You have survived a great deal of harm and the probation service can assist you with this."

No, surely not..? Not with that history? 

Duffy was handed a two-year sentence, suspended for two-years.

I guess I'm only surprised the old fool didn't dish out some money from the poor box... 

Have You Checked Your Evidence Room..?

They could be in there. Hell, they are probably working there...

The Twelve Tweets Of Christmas - Day Four

Would You Dare Say This About A Female Paramedic?

Mr Armour told the court: 'I think it seemed very unprofessional and inappropriate not because of what he was doing, but what he was allowing.

'I have never seen that before where a colleague is dealing with an intoxicated patient being inappropriate, where he was allowing it to happen.

'We deal with it all the time. By the time he found the alleged victim calling the police, he said: 'By this stage I felt that what had happened was being blown way out of proportion.

'If we called the police every time something like this happened there would never be any police on the street.'

Imagine Mr Armour's fellow paramedic had been a female one, accosted by a drunk male patient as she tried to help him. He'd be crucified for such a statement. 

So why is it ok because the genders are reversed? 

"The police came out and said it wasn’t a criminal offence."

“But we have had ongoing issues with these dogs. The only reason the police came out was because they received several calls from people and there were quite a few people in the street. There were a lot of witnesses.

"It’s disgusting that not one person in authority can do anything. The dogs should be taken away.”

Let the merry-go-round of blame shifting begin! 

A spokesman for Luton Council said: “We have an agreed protocol with Beds Police whereby such matters would be referred to them.”

Inspector Mo Nasar from the Luton community policing team said: “We have received two reports this month in connection to dangerous dogs in Beverley Road, Luton. In the second incident on Thursday (24 November) a cat was sadly killed.

“We know how emotive crimes involving pets are. While we cannot investigate animal on animal attacks (Ed: liar, I see, Mo?), we always encourage people to pursue civil action if they wish to.

What does the DDA say again, Mo?

Funny how other forces can act, and yours can't... 

“Following this incident specialist officers also issued a community protection notice to put restrictions on the owner of the dogs in this case and we will take action if these conditions are not adhered to.”

By which time it will be too late. Again. Is it any wonder the people plagued by these mutt are beginning to take the law into their own hands? 

A spokesperson for the RSPCA said: “We send our heartfelt condolences to the owner of this kitten following this really upsetting incident.

“Dog owners have a legal responsibility under the Dangerous Dogs Act 1991 to keep their dog under control in a public place. This legislation is enforced by the police and our officer has reported this sad matter to them.”

Worse than useless. 

The Twelve Tweets Of Christmas - Day Three

10 Months Is, I Suppose, Better Than Nothing...

Referring to the Facebook post, Mr Booth said: 'There were comments along the lines of the dog going for other dogs and cats.

'Somewhat ironically [the girl's] grandmother was to say to the defendant she had not personally had any knowledge of that.

'I say ironically, because having gone from no knowledge of the behaviour of the defendant's dog, the grandma of [the girl] had a very clear, up close and personal experience of what the dog was capable of.'

It was lucky the child wasn't killed.  

The court heard witnesses who saw the incident tried to help the family, with a combination of punching, pinching and kicking before it eventually let go.

Before, hopefully, they started in on the idiot chav owner? 

Addressing Garner, Judge William Ashworth said: 'There was never any intention for you to harm this very young girl.

'I am concerned about your attitude following the incident, where you said "although the dog looks evil, it's a big donut" - this speaks of your attitude.

'It was a very powerful, very large dog that should have been at the very least muzzled in a harness and on a proper lead.

'This dog presented a risk that a responsible owner would have realised.'

If only it had had one. Still, I'm sure after ten years are up, she'll be one. Won't she? 

More Met Police Recruitment Triumphs!

Luke Ponte, defending, described PC Pastina as 'thoughtful, conscientious and hardworking' but conceded: 'It may be difficult to reconcile what you have seen on the body worn footage'.

'Of course officers must show restraint, but the exceptional feature is her psychiatric background. It was the first time that she had been assaulted in this gravity at work.'

Wait, what? What sort of 'psychiatric background'? 

And why is someone with any sort of 'psychiatric background' working as a frontline cop? 

District Judge Annabel Pilling told PC Pastina: 'The body worn footage does not make for pleasant viewing. The officer I saw is not the officer I read about in the reports.

'I saw an officer using appalling language filled with vitriol and it appeared that loss of temper got the better of her.

'It is right that up until that point you were someone of good character, even exemplary character, but the flip-side is that makes it far worse.

'Trying to control an erratic and potentially dangerous defendant, you crossed that line to a criminal offence.' PC Pastina broke down in tears in the dock as she was sentenced to 16 weeks imprisonment suspended for two years.

What the hell are they doing in the recruitment section of the Met? 

The Twelve Tweets Of Christmas - Day Two

I Wonder If She Clapped..?

An 89 year old man with a broken hip and shoulder:

...the firefighter, who lives in Pontypool, was left aghast after ringing 999 only to be told there were no ambulances available and none would come to help.

Instead the call handler reportedly told Nicole to ring an out-of-hours GP and book a taxi to transport the pensioner to hospital, before hanging up in order to 'answer other calls'.

*speechless* 

'I couldn't really believe what I was being told,' said Ms Lea, who's been Melvyn's principal carer since he lost his wife Maureen to Covid in 2020. 'I was expecting a long wait for paramedics but never thought I'd literally be told, "We have nothing to send, you'll have to find alternative transport".

Alternative transport that would have killed him, at that: 

'I ended up, with my partner and mum's help, getting him onto a plank of wood and into the back of the van we bought to transport our dogs.

'To make matters worse, when we did get him to hospital the staff there told me that had we followed the advice we'd been given over the phone, he could've died.

'They told us that had we sat him up in a taxi the break in his hip would've likely ruptured an artery and been catastrophic for him.'

And who is being sacked for this gross dereliction of suty, you ask? 

Lee Brooks, Executive Director of Operations at the Welsh Ambulance Service, said: 'We are sorry to hear about Mr Ryan's experience, it is certainly below the level of service that we aim to offer. '

Really? Really...?

'Our business continuity plans are drawn up to enable us to attend to the sickest patients first, while patients whose condition is less serious may sadly have to wait longer for our help, or be advised to make their own way to hospital.'

He was an 89 year old with a broken hip and he could have died. What the hell is there to 'understand' about that? 

'We invite Mr Ryan and his family to get in touch with our Putting Things Right team so that we can investigate the situation and better understand their experience.'

How about we break your call handler's hip and leave them to the tender mercies of your 'service', so they can 'better understand the experience'..? 

More Tone Deaf Policing...

Good of you, but isn't there someone else you should be remembering?

The Twelve Tweets Of Christmas - Day One

A little festive humour to usher us into the season:

 

Do You Really Want To Bring 'Scolding' Back, Whitty?

People should have ‘the courage’ to tell off motorists who leave their engines running outside schools, Chris Whitty, the Chief Medical Officer said yesterday.

What..?! 

Mr Whitty said: ‘I think we should make really clear to people the downsides of doing this that they are actually causing significant problems, potentially to vulnerable people and I think almost every parent would consider someone who is idling a car outside their child’s school to be an incredibly antisocial person to have around.

He added: ‘I think this should be about people saying and having the courage to say, look, please don’t do this.’

Strange. You don't much like it when you are scolded by the public, do you? And you didn't listen to us when we said 'please don't lock us down again', did you?

In his annual report on the nation’s health, Professor Whitty said he has targeted air pollution as it is as significant a health risk as the Covid-19 virus.

In a way, he's right. But possibly not in the way he thinks... 

That Was Four Hours Wasted, Then...

During the trial at Canterbury Crown Court, the court heard Bissendary even returned to his vehicle to retrieve his cocaine while Mrs Sella was still trapped underneath.

Bissendary denied causing their deaths by dangerous driving, but today jurors returned unanimous guilty verdicts after deliberating for four hours and eight minutes.

Wonder what they did for the four hours? Played 'Eye Spy'? 

Bissendary claimed he was unaware of most of the injured family members and only wished to switch off the ignition. He also claimed he refused to give blood as part of a drug test in the aftermath because he suffers from a needle phobia.

Even by UK defence lawyer standards, that's somewhat pathetic... 

After the verdicts were delivered, Bissendary could be seen sitting down in the dock, taking deep breaths.

Heh! As well he might.  

He will be sentenced at the Canterbury Crown Court at a later date.

Can't wait to see how long he's going to serve. Surely the great British justice system will see he serves proper jail time?

Ouch!

Once again, Matt is spot on.

Whut..?

*sighs*

H/T: DAD via email

 

Sunday Funnies...

In 100 years time, maybe 'electing Joe Biden' will be listed as no 6...

Right Under Their Noses...

A police evidence officer who plundered more than £14,000 from evidence stores [redacted] faces jail after pleading guilty.

What have I redacted? Well, Reader, read on... 

Lisa Arnold, 52, worked as an evidence officer for Dorset police and had access to bank notes seized in previous police operations. She used her position to plunder wads of notes on 17 separate occasions - totalling £14,494.She started stealing money from the safes in Dorset Police headquarters at Winfrith, near Dorchester, in 2018 and spent three-and-a-half years going back for more.

Didn't they notice? Well, no. It seems they were handing over cash to the evidence room without counting it! 

Yes! Unbelievable as it sounds...  

Despite two internal investigations into money going missing from the station, she did not stop stealing until she was caught on March 19, 2022.

Hopeless. 

The Day Had To Come (Again)....

The day when I found a 'Guardian' post that I could only agree wholeheartedly with: 

I first read Susan Cooper’s The Dark Is Rising the summer I turned 13, the year the Berlin Wall came down. I read it by torchlight under the bedclothes, not because of parental curfew or power cut, but because that seemed the safest place to read what was, unmistakably, the eeriest novel I’d ever met.

It's a sign of Christmas! And Reader, you will know that this is one of my all time top classics.

This winter, I hope The Dark Is Rising will find new audiences around the world. For, working with the actor, director and theatre-maker Simon McBurney, and supported by Complicité (the theatre company that Simon co-founded) I’ve spent the past year adapting The Dark Is Rising as an audio drama. It will be broadcast first on BBC World Service in 12 episodes, beginning on 20 December, with an episode following each day, such that the broadcasts correspond to the “real time” of the novel’s own unfolding across the solstice, Christmas and New Year’s Eve.

This will be, I suspect, the first time I've ever tuned in to the BBC World Service! And I have high hopes for this.

Why Are You Asking Questions To Which You Already Know The Answers..?

Questions are being asked about how the boy was able to ride the scooter when Voi’s policy states riders must be over 18 and hold a provisional driving licence, as well as a valid payment method.

Hmmm, who was the boy? 

A 12-year-old boy who was killed riding an e-scooter that collided with a bus in Birmingham has been named as Mustafa Nadeem.

Ah! 

The West Midlands assistant police and crime commissioner Tom McNeil said “new questions were needed over Voi age verification” after Mustafa’s death.

No questions for the parents, then? 

Were they unaware their son was breaking the law? Did they not know how he was getting to school? 

Police said Mustafa’s family were being kept updated as they establish the full circumstances of the incident, and had asked to be allowed to grieve in private.

So is there to be no questions for them at all? 

Why The CPS Isn't Fit For Purpose...

Following the incident, the Independent Office for Police Conduct began an investigation that concluded PC Welch may have committed a criminal offence due to the standard of his driving. However, the Crown Prosecution Service determined the threshold for bringing charges was not met but following two reviews, the CPS pressed charges against PC Welch in May 2021.

And the jury said 'You must be joking!': 

PC Edward Welch, attached to South Command Unit was acquitted on Wednesday, December 7 following a trial at the Old Bailey.

So there's an end to the matter? Well, no: 

South Area Commander Chief Superintendent David Stringer said: “The deaths of Rozanne Cooper and her 10-year-old nephew Makayah McDermott have naturally left their families devastated.

“Our thoughts remain with them and we offer everyone affected by this terrible incident our sincere condolences.

“Police pursuits must be carried out in very careful and controlled circumstances in line with policy to ensure they do not put anyone at risk.

“The jury has found PC Welch did not commit a criminal offence but misconduct matters will now be carefully considered.”

Guess it's not just the CPS that's not fit for purpose... 

Gosh, Really? What A Shocker!

Said no one with more than two brain cells to rub together:

Almost a fifth of lone Albanian child refugees have gone missing, an English council has revealed. Kent county council took in 197 unaccompanied children from Albania between 1 January and 31 October of this year and, of those, 39 are missing.

Why are they even here long enough to go missing in the first place? 

Kent county council said when a child goes missing it works closely with police and the Home Office to find them.

Neither of whom could find their own arsehole with a flashlight and a hunting dog... 

Tough Luck, RMT...

...the weather's going to cripple travel before your commie forces get the chance!

The RDG said it was “a fair and affordable offer in challenging times”, with revenue from fares still at about 20% below pre-pandemic levels and the industry requiring higher levels of subsidy from government to continue running. Operators were also seeking to include Sundays on contracts, rather than relying on overtime and rest day working.

Does anyone else think that's more than they should be offered given the circumstances? 

Rewatchable TV December: The West Wing

Well, to close this down, it's the series I never should have loved. A show about a Democrat President in the White House? And he's a great President, despite flaws? Get outta here! Liberal wish fulfillment!

And yet it turned out to be one of the best things on TV. And I've watched the whole thing several times, and once more at the start of the first lockdowm. It's true comfort tv, with a superb cast, snappy writing, nail-biting cliffhangers and above all, music choices that were spot on. 

The children's choir singing 'The Little Drummer Boy' as Toby & Mrs Landingham attend the funeral of a homeless veteran, Jeff Buckley's haunting 'Hallelujah' as CJ gets some awful news, 'In A New York Minute' as Josh wrestles with another 'Big Block Of Cheese Day', and of course, this one:

 

There's quite a few new series that will - I suspect - be watched again; a lot of Disney's short Marvels, 'Game of Thrones', etc. But this will always have a special place in my heart.

Why Do We Bother With Border Force..?

I mean, do they manage to keep out anyone..?

An Albanian man who entered the UK illegally on two separate occasions has been jailed after he was found at a cannabis farm worth thousands.

Endrit Neza tended to around 300 cannabis plants - which had a potential value of between £28,000 to £120,000 - at an address in Newcastle.

The 30-year-old, who returned to England after being deported in 2017, was arrested after police raided a property on Malvain Avenue on August 24 this year and found the cannabis farm.

They don't say how. Probably just waltzed in past all our 'defences'. 

Sophia Allinson, defending, told the court Neza came to the UK out "dire financial necessity", saying: "He didn't intend to commit criminal activity like this."

Given he was committing a criminal offence by coming into the country at all, that doesn't ring quite true, eh, Sophia? 

Time Once More To Play 'Guess The Breed'...

An 83-year-old woman has been taken to hospital with life-threatening injuries and a 55-year-old man has been taken to hospital with minor injuries, Gwent Police said in a statement. The dog was seized by officers and has been destroyed.

Its breed has not yet been confirmed, the force added. No other animals were involved in the attack.

Bet it's not a labrador... 

Say, that location seems....familiar, somehow.

It comes a year after ten-year-old Jack Lis died after being attacked by a seven-stone bulldog named Beast at an address just half a mile away. The victim, named locally as Shirley Patrick, was at home - the location from which her grandson ran his dog walking business.

Two men aged 20 and 31, alongside a 28-year-old woman, were arrested on suspicion of being in charge of a dog dangerously out of control causing injury.

What the hell is wrong with Wales? 

Yes, Habitual Criminals Often Have Issues With The Police...

...you could say it's an occupational hazard:

Kumanjayi Walker had complex developmental trauma that would have influenced his interactions with police, an inquest into the Northern Territory teenager’s death has heard.

Yes, it's the 'Guardian' taking out an onion for another criminal. Because he's aboriginal, which should excuse his behaviour, apparently.

The Warlpiri man was shot three times by Constable Zachary Rolfe, who was subsequently charged with his murder. Rolfe was found not guilty of murder and two alternative charges after a six-week trial in the NT supreme court in Darwin earlier this year.

So, jury nullification is a thing Down Under too... 

Chilvers said she believed the death of the “caring young man” could have been avoided if police had employed trauma-informed practices during the attempted arrest.

Wait, what? What the hell does that even mean? 

She felt it would take years for authorities to rebuild trust with young people in Yuendumu. “Kids will say ‘You’ll get shot’ now. It’s had a significant impact,” she said on Wednesday.

“I don’t know what is needed but if these are already traumatised kids, that’s not going to help develop their relationships with police.”

Nor will being criminals. Maybe that should be explained to them? 

How Real A Possibility, Judge?

Rova, who appeared in court via video-link from HMP Bronzefield, sobbed and said 'I'm sorry' while holding rosary beads and praying.

Do you think that would be a ploy she'd try in her native Romania? 

Judge Nicholas Rimmer told Rova: 'I know you are upset. You are not going to be sentenced today so I'm going to ask you to try and calm yourself down and listen to what is going on.

'The criminality entails that whilst working as a trusted employee for the Hilton Hotel you helped yourself to £187,000 worth of jewellery from a guest's bedroom.'

Not a sudden out-of-the-blue impulse theft, we can take it? 

The judge said there was a 'real possibility' that she would be sentenced to prison time and that there was another issue being brought against her.

Rova could be seen on the video-link praying on her knees while weeping and holding a rosary as the judge remanded her in custody ahead of sentence on January 27, 2023.

We'll see, eh, Judge Rimmer? 

Tone Deaf Policing...

This was the infamous episode where a man chased two burglars who broke into his house, who then crashed. And of course, the police treated him as the criminal. 

They haven't - of course! - provided any more information at all. They've simply sought to justify their position, which is 'leave it to the police'. 

Which people would be happy to do, if the idle bastards could be trusted to do the job they are paid for...

H/T: Melindi Scott via Twitter

"Quis custodiet ipsos custodes?"

Well, not this chap, not any more...

In a statement, Suella Braverman said: “I have accepted Michael Lockwood’s resignation as director general of the Independent Office for Police Conduct (IOPC).

“I took immediate action upon being made aware that Mr Lockwood was the subject of a police investigation into an historic allegation, and instructed my officials to ask him to resign or face immediate suspension from his role.

“Home Office staff are working at pace with the IOPC’s unitary board to put in place temporary arrangements for the organisation’s leadership.”

Nice to know they can move quickly when they want to, eh? 

Please Don't Bare Anything, Your Majesty...

*sighs*

H/T: David Bain via email

Did They Run Out Of Taser And Batons..?

...or is it a case of 'can't beat 'em, join 'em!'..?

Sunday Funnies...

The movies are caught lying to us again.

So...Where Were You?

Ethan's father Luke Turvey welcomed the sentence of his former partner.

Writing on Facebook he said: 'So a long four and a half years has finally finished today, Stacey Davis has gone to prison for two years for cruelty and neglect of my son Ethan.

'Me and my family are extremely emotional and happy that she got what she deserved. And for anyone who backed her and stood up for her I hope you feel like complete and utter idiots and I hope you feel ashamed of yourselves, she is a child abuser and has paid the price by going to prison.'

Why was your son left with her? How can a single mother afford a car, mobile phone, cannabis habit, etc? Who thinks a two year sentence (which she won't serve in full, they never do) is fit punishment?

So many questions.

Is It?

I thought it was just what you were..? How you were born? No more remarkable, this day and age, than being heterosexual?

What sort of art are we talking about, anyway?

Mexican artist Frieda Toranzo Jaeger works with what she calls “semiological vandalism” – by which she “vandalizes” dominant images and thus injects new, subversive meaning into them. Car engines have lately predominated her work, as she sees them as representative of the massive systems that govern the world. At Art Basel Miami, Toranzo Jaeger is exhibiting an image of a car engine deconstructed into the form of a flower, shot through with braided thread. By turning a car engine into a flower adorned with braids, she injects her queerness and womanhood into a traditionally patriarchal structure.

PARKLIFE!! 

Sorry, sorry, that just slipped out...

Queer performance artist rafa esparza takes on cars and cruising in a very different way: straddling intersectional aspects of his identity, he brings out the resonances between different kinds of cruising – gay cruising and low-rider cars – by turning himself into a low-rider vehicle and inviting select members of his community to jump on for a ride.

*backs away slowly* There's enough material here for David Thompson's blog to exist for another few years...

That's A Very Good Question, Sky News...

Do you answer it?

The charity boss at the centre of the Buckingham Palace racism row and her six siblings grew up in the 1960s as the "only black family on our road. Ngozi Fulani, now 61, said her parents, who had moved to Britain from Barbados as part of the Windrush generation, "embraced everybody" and never allowed the "barriers we faced outside" to be brought into the house in Kilburn, northwest London.

Reader, they do not. 

You might think 'Ngozi Fulani' is not a very Barbadian name, and, well, whaddayaknow?

Ah, modern 'journalism'...

Well, This Is Unprecedented!

*puzzled face* Yes, and..?

H/T: IanJ via email

The Backtracking Begins...

Britain didn't need to roll out Covid booster jabs to the entire population, one of the country's top virus experts said today.

Sir John Bell, who served as Boris Johnson's testing tsar and an early member of the vaccines taskforce, said he's 'not entirely sure' the nation needed top-up doses, which health chiefs said were vital for all adults to boost protection amid the Omicron wave last winter.

Who's next..? Because you know that once one does it, they all do it... 

Pretty soon, you won't find anyone willing to admit they had a hand in this.