Happy New Year All!

And here's to 2017! May it be all we wish it to be...

Normal service will resume on Monday.

Absent Friends....

As we begin the countdown to slip out of 2016 and into a new year, and all that might bring, please raise a glass with me to those we have lost:

Captain Ranty (Blog now sadly gone dark)

Unenlightened Commentary

Anna Raccoon (who closed her blog just before Christmas, as her diagnosis was sadly progressing)

Gone, but not forgotten.

Post Title Of The Month

Al Jahom takes away the trophy for the last time in 2016...

Quote Of The Month

Fahrenheit 211 on lazy journalism:

"This is an excellent piece that is a an antidote to the lazy and inaccurate writing of Mr Dysch. For my own part I’m also disgusted at both the timid attitude taken by all too many in Britain’s Jewish community towards Islamic extremists who promote Shariah and the hostility shown to those like Mr Robinson who are standing up against it. For what it’s worth I’d like to tell Mr Dysch this: I’d rather have Mr Robinson on my side than those whether they be Jew or non-Jew who refuse to look at, let alone do anything about, the growing problems with Islamic extremism in Britain today."

Post Of The Month

Peter Risdon on why Trump's Presidency may not be the car-crash calamity we all might fear...

A New Hope...?

Rebecca Solnit (Guardian US contributing opinion writer, historian, activist and contributing editor at Harper's magazine) on 'hope':

A dozen years ago I talked about hope to a roomful of working-class community college students in Washington, citing the German philosopher Ernst Bloch to the effect that without hope there is no action but without action there is no hope. A woman said in a clear voice that she agreed, because if she had not hoped she would not have struggled and if she had not struggled she would not have survived Pol Pot and the Cambodian genocide.

The 'hope' she wishes for? Well, I'm sure you've guessed by now:

In the United States we are probably headed for a very grim phase of uncertain duration.

Yes, indeed. The prospect of a Trump presidency is exactly like the Pol Pot regime...

There is another America rising and taking action, and it is beautiful. I’m thinking of the many stories of people standing up for the vulnerable, directly when they intervene in confrontations with haters. Or indirectly, as with the young woman I know who co-organised the creation of Neveragain.tech, a public oath people working in tech can take to refuse to create Muslim registries, turn over people’s private data, or otherwise cooperate with state persecution.

This 'new hope' looks a lot like treason and sabotage to me. And to the commenters at Tim Worstall's blog.

This Is What They Have To Do!

The woman called police when she tried to hang herself after drinking while her husband was out walking their 10-month-old daughter.

She said she was arrested, carried out in handcuffs and leg restraints and put face down in a police van. She then claims female officers pinned her down while her clothes and jewellery were removed in a police cell in Crowhurst Road, Brighton, in 2012.

Yup, well, if you're claiming to be suicidal, of course they are going to make sure you've got nothing on you than can be used to self-harm. It's a no-brainer.

She was left naked and crying on the cell floor with a blanket to cover her before being released without charge 11 hours later.

The ordeal, captured on CCTV, triggered horrific memories of being gang-raped as a teenager, she claimed.

Apart from any actual rape.

The woman, from Brighton, told the national newspaper: "Losing control and having to beg people to stop puts you in a position of absolute weakness and vulnerability.

"My motivation for speaking out is both to stand up against the ill-treatment I personally received, but also to help prevent others from experiencing similar incidents."

Nope, they'd do the same. They have to. They'd be crucified otherwise, if some nutcase manages to off themselves with their clothing...

Michael Oswald, of Bhatt Murphy Solicitors, who is representing the woman, said: "It is incomprehensible police officers forcibly stripped her naked despite her mental state and being told she was a rape victim."

You're an idiot. At least she's a headcase. What's your excuse?

What Good Would 'Support Services' Have Done?

Rebecca Harris, Tory MP for Castle Point, used Kelly’s case as she pleaded for change in the Commons over domestic violence laws at the second reading of a Private Member’s Bill.

MPs were debating whether to ratify the Istanbul Convention, an international treaty on domestic and sexual violence, aiming to improve protection for victims. It would increase the availability of support services for people who experience domestic and sexual abuse.

So did Kelly die because she needed vital 'support services' and didn't get any?

Kelly Pearce, 36, was stabbed in the face and neck 40 times by Anthony Ayres in November last year and died after suffered skull and brain damage in the assault.

Anthony Ayres was convicted by a jury at Chelmsford Crown Court in July for the murder of his partner, and given a full life sentence.

Ayres was already a convicted killer after strangling his girlfriend in 1993.

Ah. No. Kelly died because she decided to shack up with a convicted killer. Who'd been released by the same State now demanding taxpayers stump up for talking shops.

See, We Don't Need To Import Nigerian 419 Fraudsters...

The Bolton Tent City camp set up in Cheadle Square on Christmas Eve. Organisers had asked local people to give items for the homeless.

A handful of tents were pitched and people called at the site on Christmas Eve and on Christmas Day to donate clothes, camping equipment, sleeping bags and food to help.

The organisers said the project was largely taking place to protest against the way Bolton Council deals with homeless people, as well as to help those less fortunate in the town.

 Awww. How heartwarming!

So, naturally, all the snowflakes and SJWs arranged a bit of public virtuesignalling:

Liberal Democrat campaigner Warren Fox was contacted by Bolton Tent City and visited Cheadle Square on Christmas Day to donate warm clothes to the project.

But, oh no! What's happened?

...now concerns have been raised among those who donated items after the Facebook group which was organising the project disappeared.

The main contact phone number being used to contact people is no longer working.

The four tents remain in Cheadle Square but they are empty and there is no sign of the organisers or any homeless people.

Excuse me a minute...

Ahahahahahahahahahaha!

On Facebook, ‘Shana Bee Bee’ said she had been blocked by the Bolton Tent City group on Facebook after volunteering to help.

She said: “I went down there on Christmas Day with my kids with lots of tea and cakes, only to find no one was there.

“We waited for two hours. We gave morning notice we’re coming in the evening.

“I contacted them and they told me they had to nip home to charge their phones.

"Then they blocked me on Facebook.”

Oh, stop! You're killing me! *wipes away tears of mirth*

The Bolton News was able to briefly make contact with Andy Dodd, one of the people purported to be organising the project.

He said he could not comment on the situation, as he was currently seeking legal advice about comments he said had been made about him on social media channels.

*rolls on floor laughing*

If Only There'd Been Some Sign...

Kevin Dixon, 37, attacked neighbour Mark Hunter and his wife in November last year after the couple went round to his home on Castle Avenue to check he was alright.

Dixon pushed Mr Hunter’s wife causing her to fall down some steps into a fence and when her husband intervened he was pushed to the ground by the defendant.

Prosecutor David McGonigal said Dixon was kicking Mr Hunter in the body as his wife shouted at him to stop.

“The defendant then stamped on Mr Hunter’s ankle causing it to break,” said Mr McGonigal.

“The defendant threw some unknown liquid over Mrs Hunter before closing his door.”

Nice!

Dixon was bailed after being interviewed by police about that incident, but five weeks later he was involved in another violent attack at the Dalton home of his former partner Toni Gledhill.

Bradford Crown Court heard yesterday (Mon) that during the violence Dixon grabbed Miss Gledhill by the throat and armed himself with knives.

Maybe a remand in custody might have prevented this? But I guess no-one could have forseen that he was...

Oh!

Dixon, who was given a suspended jail sentence after being convicted of animal cruelty in April 2015, pleaded guilty to wounding Mr Hunter and assaulting his wife. He also admitted a charge of affray in relation to the violence at Miss Gledhill’s home.

Naturally, he's all better now.

Barrister Chloe Fairley, for Dixon, said he had spent the last three months in hospital receiving treatment after being remanded in custody a year ago and he was now in a very different state than he was last year.

She said that Dixon was “not a well man” at the time of the offences.

But is sound as a pound now. OK, then, Chloe, tell you what - you provide him with room and board for six months.

That'll be the acid test, won't it?

"Friends took to Facebook to pay their tributes ..."

...to a life well-lived?

Lauren Bedford said: “I can’t believe you’re gone, you were a top lad, and we had so many laughs you’re going to be madly missed by many.”

Wayne Morely said: “Devastated can’t begin to describe how I feel right now. My first apprentice taken on at work - Reigan Knight - has been tragically killed in a car crash in Essex last night, only 17 and had a bright future, he was a character and will be sorely missed by me and everyone at Monarch Communications, thoughts go out to all his family and friends. R.I.P. Reigan.”

Kyi Innis said: “Worst news to wake up to. Rest up Reigan Knight, you were one of the nicest guys I’ve ever met - always showing love no matter.”

Terrible, just terrible, life's so cruel...

Residents who lived near the scene spoke of their shock, while others said the road was dangerous.

Awful! When will the state do something about these black spots?

“The police were here all night and they were still outside this morning but they wouldn’t give us any information."

They must be trying to work out how this dreadful accident came to pass...

“It is a notorious corner for accidents and in the eight years I have lived here there have been at least four.

“They are also talking about turning it into a one way system which will cause even more trouble.”

Oh, dear. Well, if it stops one more innocent life from being claimed in a trag...

Wait.

Another teen has been arrested on suspicion of causing death by dangerous driving and possession of class A drugs with intent to supply.

A fourth was arrested on suspicion of possession of cannabis.

A police car had been pursuing a Ford Escort involved in the crash just prior to the incident, which has been referred by Essex Police to the Independent Police Complaints Commission (IPCC).

*sighs* Never mind...

Well, If Ever There Was A Case For 'Gentrification'...

Basildon Council has revealed plans to refurbish Grade II listed Brooke House, opposite the Eastgate Centre, as part of its town centre regeneration strategy.

The authority said it is still drawing up proposals for the building - which will add to work to revamp neighbouring Freedom House and East Walk.

...Basildon would be it!

Andrew Gordon, Labour councillor for Lee Chapel North, grew up in the tower block. He admitted the building needs refurbishing - but said he hopes it will not come at the expense of current tenants.

Mr Gordon said: “We need to sit down with them as a council and find out what it is that they want from the refurbishment.

“It seems as though we are trying to gentrify Basildon, and when I speak to people living and working in the town centre about the regeneration plans for Basildon they seem to be worried about being priced out through rents.

“We can all agree that change needs to happen at Brooke House, but it has to be the right sort of changes.

“It is really important we don’t exclude anyone and consult with the residents.”

If you change the housing, but not the residents, you know what you'll get?

Yup. That's right. You'll get Basildon.

Conclusive Proof That Animal Rights Nutters Are Bonkers...

The foster family caring for Rocky - which previously mauled another dog to death - reported that the three-year-old Staffordshire Bull Terrier had tried to attack young children, their niece and nephew.

It was one of two separate attacks.

Though he was muzzled, he had tried to bite one of the children’s necks, jabbing with his paws and growling loudly. It forced the family to call the wardens to take him away and he was put down the following day after extensive discussions with various authorities last month.

Good riddance. But wait!

But a new petition which claimed the wardens acted “illegally”, started by the charity Staffie and Stray Rescue which was responsible for housing Rocky, has seen a lot of calls for the wardens to be sacked and even charged with murder.

Others threatened the wardens and their families, arguing they should be “euthanised” and “ashamed of themselves”.

*boggles*

Calli Byrne, the charity’s founder, apologised for the unwanted attention the petition had attracted.“We wanted to speak to the council but we do not condone any abuse towards people doing their jobs. That was not our intention. We just wanted to let people know about what happened to Rocky. A lot of people loved Rocky, some who never had any issue with him at all. It was a real shock for us. My argument is still that something should have happened before he was euthanised. It’s something we would not consider unless there was no other option.”

There was no other option. There!

Go protest outside your local halal butcher instead, where you might do some actual good. But expecting logic from these people is clearly an exercise in futility:

Barking. Utterly, utterly barking...

Does Anyone Remember When The Conservative Party Drew On The Best And Brightest?

...instead of selecting mouth-breathing morons whose only 'qualification' is their gender?

Thanks, David Cameron. This is your legacy...

H/T: seanthomasknox via Twitter

"Batteries Not Included"

Ooops! My mistake!

There was no indication of any blackmail demand or threat, a spokesman said.

Yet!

When You Just Can't Resist....

...shoehorning Brexit into everything...

Sore losers, much, 'Guardian'..?

"Happy Christmas to all, and to all a good night!"

Normal service will resume on Boxing Day!

Time For Some Festive Music..?

Why not?

Without One Of These, It Just Wouldn't Be Christmas!

I'm talking, of course, about 'outrage over kiddiewinks being told Santa isn't real!' stories:

Children at Prince Avenue Primary School, in Hornby Avenue, Westcliff, are rehearsing “Gimme, Gimme, Gimme” for their Christmas performance.

The play features two spoiled children who expect to get everything they want for Christmas, but are taught that not everyone has such a wonderful Christmas as them.

However, parents are concerned that the play includes lines suggesting that Santa is not real, as it makes reference to parents dressing up as him to deliver their presents.

*gasps*

A parent, whose four year old daughter attends the school, was appalled by the choice of play.

He said: “Thankfully my daughter hasn’t said anything about it yet, but another parent said that while they were Christmas shopping, their child asked if Father Christmas was real.

“It broke the parent’s heart to hear their child ask that.

“My daughter will hear the children singing the songs about him not existing.

“It is not acceptable that they are performing this play.

“I am disgusted.”

A piece of coal for the snowflake! Bring on the mince pies, and let's get this holiday on the road!

On The Twelfth Day Of Brexit, The Metro 'Letters' Page Gave To Me…

...people wanting a do-over!

Also fevered nationalist dreamers, clueless stroppy youngsters, sensible levelheaded folk, bitter hysterical Remainers, judicial activism cheerleaders, wild Utopian dreamers, readers cottoning on, dire 'racism' predictions, touching faith in 'experts', stroppy democracy deniers and baffled angry voters.

Remember Why I Said I Loved Twitter?

...because when it was good, it was very, very good?

Reader, today was another of those days:

LOL!

The Second Man...

Hayley Carter, 23, gave a statement to police after they had carried out a drugs raid at an address in Crawley.

Officers arrested a man and charged him with possessing a stolen shotgun and with handling stolen property.

Later they detained a second man on suspicion of the same offences and he was placed on police bail.

Excellent!

Carter, of Turners Hill Road, Crawley Down, became aware of the second arrest and made a statement to police which further incriminated the man, who was subsequently charged.

Great! How public spirited some people are!

As a direct result of Carter's statement the Crown Prosecution Service (CPS) decided to drop the case against the first man.

At the trial of the second man in February 2015, Carter failed to appear as a witness.

Ooops! Maybe she was washing her hair?

The defence produced video evidence shot by a friend on a mobile phone in the toilets of a Crawley nightclub on the preceding New Years Eve in which Carter clearly admits that the man is innocent. The trial was stopped. No further action is being taken against either man.

But don't worry! There's someone who - for once! - the police and CPS will take action against. Can you guess who it is?

Officers arrested 23-year-old Carter and charged her with perverting the course of justice.

She was handed an 18 month community order at Hove Crown Court in October.

Typical! But this time, the police & CPS weren't about to accept a pussy pass, oh dear me, no...

However the CPS appealed against the sentence being unduly lenient at the Court of Appeal on December 1.

Carter, a telephonist, has now been jailed for 12 months.

Heh!

Detective sergeant Jon Robeson, of Sussex Police, said: "Carter's action caused a man to be in prison for five months awaiting trial, and also had the effect of causing the original case against the first man to be called into question so that it had to be withdrawn.

"The sentence sends the message that attempts to pervert the course of justice are taken very seriously and that people who make false statements to the police, and to the courts, must expect to face justice themselves."

Well, if so, you've got a bit of a backlog. Chop chop!

On The Eleventh Day Of Brexit, The Metro 'Letters' Page Gave To Me…

...fevered nationalist dreamers.

Also clueless stroppy youngsters, sensible levelheaded folk, bitter hysterical Remainers, judicial activism cheerleaders, wild Utopian dreamers, readers cottoning on, dire 'racism' predictions, touching faith in 'experts', stroppy democracy deniers and baffled angry voters..

The 'Guardian' Solves The Tricky Issue Of Those Adult 'Child Refugees'...

To the sound of a football match being played downstairs, I meet Islam and 17-year-old Maya from Syria, Arash and Samad, both 16, from Afghanistan, and 18-year-old Hamid from Iran, who is awaiting a court hearing about an age dispute.

All live with foster carers or family members and – with the help of the Children’s Society, one of three beneficiaries of the Guardian and Observer’s Christmas charity appeal – all have places at school, but the question of age hangs heavy and storm-like over the conversation.

Despite being a youth club, everybody here looks oddly ageless, in a way that quickly reminds you that children are not built for escaping from war alone, on dinghies and in crates. It’s not that these teenagers in their clean trainers and Adidas caps look old – it’s that they look exhausted.

It's because they are exhausted, poor little mites! Obvious, really...

Spitting In Our Faces...

Severe disruption was caused on various major roads this morning due to a large funeral procession.

Funny. I attended an uncle's funeral just this week, and it didn't cause any disruption to anyone. We'd have all been mortified if it did!

But this isn't just any funeral...

The procession, thought to be for a person in the travelling community, moved along the London-bound track of the A12 before heading along the A130 into Basildon from 11am.

Essex Police warned drivers to expect traffic disruption.

Funny how Essex Police are so hot on traffic disruption at other times and with other drivers, eh?

"Essex Police has made preparations to ensure the procession is facilitated safely and with as minimal disruption to the public as possible."

This afternoon, the spokesman thanked motorists for their patience.

Like they had any choice in the matter...

On The Tenth Day Of Brexit, The Metro 'Letters' Page Gave To Me…

...clueless stroppy youngsters

Also sensible levelheaded folk, bitter hysterical Remainers, judicial activism cheerleaders, wild Utopian dreamers, readers cottoning on, dire 'racism' predictions, touching faith in 'experts', stroppy democracy deniers and baffled angry voters.

Grinding Slowly Again..

An inquest has been opened into the death of a 100-year-old woman who died after being hit in a supermarket car park.

Sounds a bit like she was hit by a reversing car backing out of a space, or something, doesn't it?

Nothing could be farther from the truth. She was safe on the pavement behind bollards when some idiot in a van mistook the accelerator for the brake.

Joan Roskilly, who lived at Homeowan House, in Station Road, Thorpe Bay, died at the scene of the crash outside Asda, Shoebury, on Tuesday, November 29.

The great-great grandmother, who had battled cancer, a kidney transplant and survived four heart attacks, had celebrated her landmark birthday just months earlier.

Sadly, she couldn't survive the idiocy of her fellow shoppers:

The inquest was adjourned until Friday, March 10, for a forensic collision investigation report to be completed.

Jesus! Who are they getting to write it, George R R Martin? Thomas Harris?

Does she come from Glasgow? 

The Only Place He Needs To 'Get Out To'...

...is Bangladesh. And he can stay there:

Alluding to Hamid’s mental conditions, defence barrister Naeem Mian said: “It will be a living nightmare, my lord, a living nightmare.

“If it could be said of anybody, he needs to get out more, it’s Mr Hamid.”

Luckily, this fell on deaf ears:

Judge Peter Rook QC rejected his plea for a suspended sentence and said there needed to be a deterrent.

He said the IS video, produced and edited to a “very high standard” by the media centre responsible for the terrorist organisation’s publications, had glorified its fighters and “goads” the military forces. The judge highlighted the defendant’s “extensive library of extremist material” which was uncovered by police following his arrest in February.

While acknowledging Bangladesh-born Hamid had said he had learned his lesson, the judge said: “There must be a significant element of deterrent and in my view an immediate custodial sentence is inevitable.”

Two years. Not much of 'a living hell' either.

On The Ninth Day Of Brexit, The Metro 'Letters' Page Gave To Me…

...sensible levelheaded folk.

Also bitter hysterical Remainers, judicial activism cheerleaders, wild Utopian dreamers, readers cottoning on, dire 'racism' predictions, touching faith in 'experts', stroppy democracy deniers and baffled angry voters.

I Hope The Dog Is OK Now....

Emergency services rushed to the scene at the West Meadows camp near Ipswich on Sunday night after reports of the violence.

A horse injured during the melee, which saw two caravans torched and several other properties wrecked, had to be put down.

One man was also bitten by a police dog and needed hospital treatment during the incident, Sussex Police said.

Poor dog.

Five men and a teenage boy were arrested following the incident, police said.

It comes after two men, aged 18 and 32, died when they were stabbed at the site near the A14 on Thursday.

It's cultural, you know...

Hang On, Why Isn't It 'Ex-Boyfriend'..?

A student who smuggled cannabis and ecstasy into prison for her boyfriend has been spared jail after a court heard she was scared of him.

He's behind bars. How scared did she need to be?

Chris Whitcombe, mitigating, said: “It was more by luck than judgement that the substances were not actually provided to Mr Layzell.

“I wouldn’t class her as vulnerable in the true sense of the word, but she certainly has been preyed upon by Mr Layzell and manipulated.

“He never told her what his sentence was other than it was something to do with robbery and for firearms.

“That would indicate what type of person she was dealing with. He was phoning her, we believe using a mobile phone within the prison.”

Hang on. If she was 'his girlfriend', how come she didn't know what he was in for?

Alder, who has no previous convictions, sobbed throughout the hearing to such a degree that Judge Samantha Leigh intervened to assure her she would not be jailed.

*sighs*

On The Eighth Day Of Brexit, The Metro 'Letters' Page Gave To Me…

...bitter hysterical Remainers.

Also judicial activism cheerleaders, wild Utopian dreamers, readers cottoning on, dire 'racism' predictions, touching faith in 'experts', stroppy democracy deniers and baffled angry voters.

Arrested Development..?

Donna Stringer, who has learning difficulties, had to be rushed to hospital in a critical condition and suffered severe burns to her arms after the attack in Barking.

The 43-year-old was asleep at Lynnwood Care Home in Beccles Drive when a firework was thrown into the building, sparking a blaze in November last year.

Bloody kids, why don't they grow up and...

Oh?

Sabbir Ahmed and Muhammad Aktaruz Jaman Khan, both aged 23 and from Bethnal Green, pleaded guilty to intending to destroy or damage property and being reckless as to whether life was endangered.

FFS...

Khan, of Rickman Street, Whitechapel, was jailed for six years and four months, half of which will be served on licence, after he previously pleaded guilty to the same charge.

He was also jailed for a further eight months for breaching his suspended sentence for bringing a stun gun into Heathrow airport.

Such a credit to society, eh?

Snowflake Generation Policing

Investigating officer, Pc Ben Herridge, said: “The victim was clearly very shaken and upset by the incident.

“She feels nervous and uncomfortable using the railway after what happened to her and for fear of a repeat incident.

“If you are the man who pushed this woman over at St Albans City station in the summer, you know who you are, please come forward and resolve this incident so that the victim can move on with her life.”

I'm amazed they have time for this, overwhelmed as they are by the hunt for the poster mastermind and potential new 'hate crime' on the Tube....

On The Seventh Day Of Brexit, The Metro 'Letters' Page Gave To Me…

...judicial activism cheerleaders.

Also wild Utopian dreamers, readers cottoning on, dire 'racism' predictions, touching faith in 'experts', stroppy democracy deniers and baffled angry voters.

Winding Up Animal Rights Cretins...

...it never gets old!

People Ask Me Why I Like Twitter...

...because when it's good, it's very, very good.

Sunday Funnies...

Meh! I think I'll take the risk....

On The Sixth Day Of Brexit, The Metro 'Letters' Page Gave To Me…

...wild Utopian dreamers.

Also readers cottoning on, dire 'racism' predictions, touching faith in 'experts', stroppy democracy deniers and baffled angry voters.

Don't They Know There's A War On?

In November Northumbria police announced increased numbers of firearms officers on patrol, and invited people with concerns to "chat" with them.

What a great idea!

Thousands of people responded to the force's pictures on Facebook and Twitter.

Ah, see the heartwarming power of social media? Bringing people together and...

Oh.

Comments included: "Please keep your guns away from our children."

Errr...

"Armed police does (sic) everything but 'reassure' the public, it makes us really uncomfortable. This isn't the states!"

No, in the States, you can count on owning your own gun to defend yourself!

"I do not want to live in a country where it's a daily occurrence to see armed police with semi automatic weapons patrolling our streets and our Xmas events."

I don't want to live in one where terrorists get a free run at stabbing and running over people. Especially one invited here by our own government..

Supt Steve Neill said: "In terms of posing with children, that would be at the request of children or their parents or grandparents.

"What we are trying to say is that these are just police officers who happen to have a gun.

"Don't be alarmed, don't be scared, go and have a chat with them."

The police must despair at times. I know I do.

It's A Dirty Job, But If Someone Wants To Do It..?

A controversial scheme allowing deer-hunting at Epping Forest has been axed after claims from critics that they saw animals being “disembowelled”.

Well, you can't cook them unless you do...

Campaigners wrote: “There have been reported incidents of people witnessing deer being disembowelled and of hunters being off the designated land.

“People have reported to have seen hunters with obviously visible weapons on display.”

Ooooh, matron!

“We do not approve of any hunting for sport and demand that this contract is reviewed with immediate effect.”

I do not approve of people who don't like a sport demanding that everyone else stops. Where can I demand you get 'reviewed'..?

A spokesman for the corporation said: “We have terminated the contract with Capreolus Club for the management of the deer population on the Epping Forest Buffer Lands.

“We have listened to the views of our visitors and we have taken this decision to reflect recent public concern.

“The Epping Forest Committee will now investigate options and decide on an alternative way forward for sustainable deer population control on the Epping Forest Buffer Lands.

“A decision will be made in the best interests of both the ecology of the area and its visitors. Until a suitable replacement can be found, the deer population will be managed by our fully qualified forest keepers.”

Who will use invisible guns and let the meat spoil, I suppose..?

On The Fifth Day Of Brexit, The Metro 'Letters' Page Gave To Me…

...readers cottoning on.

Also dire 'racism' predictions, touching faith in 'experts', stroppy democracy deniers and baffled angry voters.

Another #Golfclap For Essex Police...

Lillo Troisi, 48, admitted manslaughter and arson this month over the fire at the Grampian flats on the Balmoral estate in Westcliff that killed 30-year-old Khabi Abrey on May 9.

The Echo can now reveal that Troisi, who lived in the same block of flats, was wanted over an incident at Barclays bank in Southend High Street on March 7, during which threats were made to two female workers.

Did Essex Police speed round to bang him up as they do with other crimes?

Reader, they did not...

Despite police racing to the scene and later gathering CCTV evidence, an attempt to arrest Troisi in April failed and he was not arrested until he was already in custody on May 9, following the fire.

Well, they didn't have to go too far at least.

*Rummages For Tiny Violin*

He cited the problem of the staff association opposing a move to put microwaves on the wings as “symptomatic of what seemed to have gone wrong at Hindley”.

He said many prisoners locked up all day only received a hot meal at 4pm and were given an inadequate breakfast pack to see them through to lunchtime the next day.

A move to install microwaves would have been an improvement but “good intentions were not being translated into action on the wings”.

Oh, those poor souls! What could adequately sum up my feelings here?

And also:

On The Fourth Day Of Brexit, The Metro 'Letters' Page Gave To Me…

...dire 'racism' predictions.

Also touching faith in 'experts', stroppy democracy deniers and baffled angry voters.

Can't They Be Done For 'Disposal Of A Weapon'..?

A court has been unable to put a control order on a large dog which was dangerously out of control when it attacked a smaller dog in front of children outside an Ipswich primary school.

Because of general justice system incompetence?

Ipswich magistrates were going to consider the move during a case involving Kimberley Hatfield, of Aster Road, Ipswich, but they were told Rocky, a mixed breed, had been sold to a new owner. As the owner was not in court an order could not be made.

Ah.

Hatfield and her partner Glen Tilley had only had the dog for around three weeks. Mrs Harper said the previous owner warned them Rocky “could go hyper”.

Why would you take on (buy?) a dog like that? And then sell it on? 

Who buys these mutts, and why?

A community resolution was offered to Hatfield, which would resolve the matter with the owner of the other dog without bringing a case to court. Both parties accepted on the basis Hatfield would pay the £281.60 vet’s bill for Star to treat the injuries Rocky caused.

However, no money was paid.

Well, I'm shocked. No doubt they have an excuse?

Mr Tilley added compensation had not been paid as his partner had been pregnant and they had forgotten as they were worried about their baby.

Why are such people allowed to breed?

Why Only 'Likely'..?

The killer of renowned academic and new father Dr Jeroen Ensink has been stripped of his right to live in the UK and is likely to be deported if he is ever deemed fit for release, a court heard.

Wha..?

Earlier, the court had heard how Nandap came to Britain to study African studies and economic development on a student visa.

In Spring last year, he became psychotic from smoking cannabis and believed voices telling him he was a "Messiah".

In May 2015, he was arrested for wielding a knife in public and punching and biting a police officer.

While on conditional bail, Nandap went home to Nigeria where he was treated for mental illness. His sister informed British police about his condition in August and handed in a certificate saying he was unfit to travel.

Maybe while we're waiting for the booby hatch to spit Nandap into the waiting arms of an immigration deportation squad, they could get some practice in with the sister?

On The Third Day Of Brexit, The Metro 'Letters' Page Gave To Me…

...touching faith in 'experts'.

Also stroppy democracy deniers and baffled angry voters.

Maybe They Gave Him Anatomy Lessons?

A teenager was jailed for 13 years today for stabbing a schoolboy to death a month after he was sent on ‘a knife awareness course.’

Walker Sesay, 19, was sentenced for stabbing Che Labastide-Wellington, 17, through the heart outside of a 16-year-old girl's birthday party on November 7, 2015, in Harrow, northwest London.

He seems to have learned something then, at least!

This is the trial featured here. We now learn that it was 'a feud between neighbouring estates in north-west London' and not just a birthday party gatecrashed by gangs, as first reported.

Sesay and six co-defendants were acquitted of murder by a jury after 42 hours and 24 minutes’ deliberations.

But Sesay alone was found guilty of manslaughter.

Why was joint enterprise not considered?

Losing In The Genetic Lottery Of Life

Tiffany Renton, 25, is currently living in temporary accommodation in Chichester Close, Basildon, while her usual home, in Lincoln Road, has some repair work done.

But she claims neither of the first floor properties are suitable for her daughters, who both have severe health issues.

How severe?

Her daughter Nova, four, has Kawasaki disease, which can cause inflammation in the walls of her arteries.

Miss Renton’s 15-month-old daughter Mary is facing a dangerous operation to reshape her skull after being born with a long list of health problems, which include Crouzon syndrome, a genetic disorder which sees bones in the skull fuse together prematurely, and Plagiocephaly, which is also known as flat head syndrome.

Miss Renton, who also has regular epileptic seizures, is worried about falling ill when carrying the children up the stairs to either home.

Yikes! There's a bit of a feeling here that this is a woman that really shouldn't be breeding...

Miss Renton claims Basildon Council has given her very little help to move into a new home so has started a petition calling on the authority to help her, which has been signed by nearly 800 people.

She said: “I just want a suitable home on the ground floor for my babies as our first floor flat just isn’t suitable.

“I have epilepsy and since this has all been going on my fits have been getting a lot more regular and I’m worried it might happen if I am going downstairs holding the baby.

“But I’ve been told I’m not a priority case.”

Well, you're only there while work is done on your council accommodation. Even at the glacially slow pace of a council workman, it's not going to be for long.

A council spokesman said the authority has received Miss Renton’s application for a two-bedroom property. She added: “However we are now in the process of obtaining medical evidence, in light of the recent petition Miss Renton has posted, to support her request for additional priority and ground floor accommodation.

“The council recognises Ms Renton’s concerns regarding her children and is looking into this as a matter of urgency.”

*sighs*

Anyone wondering why people resort to the papers has their answer. Because it works...

On The Second Day Of Brexit, The Metro 'Letters' Page Gave To Me…

...stroppy democracy deniers.

Also baffled angry voters.

Do Sue, Grabbitt And Runn Do Loyalty Points..?

Sophoullis Kyriacou and his daughter Nikki left their pug Neville with the friend while Nikki, who has a muscle weakening condition, was undergoing a blood transfusion at a hospital in Oxford.

But four days later Neville was discovered dead on the Hapton bypass just yards from junction eight of the M65.

Now Mr Kyriacou, of Sunny Bower Close, Blackburn, has been awarded £1,000 after taking the case to the county court.

Now, you might wonder at the sort of chap who asks a friend to do him a favour and then sues that friend when an accident occurs.

Wonder no more:

Sophoullis Kyriacou pursued a claim against East Lancashire Hospitals NHS Trust arising out of the circumstances leading to the death of his wife, Maggie, 48, in August 2011 from multiple organ failure.

The dad-of-one claimed during a 10-day hospital stay the care his wife received immediately before her death fell below what he expected.

Although not admitting liability, trust directors agreed an out-of-court settlement.

Mr Kyriacou said he had been fighting for justice for five years and ‘no amount of money could make up for what happened’.

Really? Seems money is quite useful. Not as useful as having your lawyer on speed dial, clearly!

This Is Not, And Never Has Been, The Purpose Of A School...

Kevin Prunty is executive head teacher at Cranford community college, a high-achieving school in Hounslow, west London. His pupils are ambitious and successful, but many come from disadvantaged backgrounds.

Like other schools serving deprived areas, Cranford find itself increasingly playing a sophisticated welfare role in its community.

It is also footing the bill for uniforms, PE kits, shoes, lunches and educational trips from a diminishing budget, to subsidise parents who cannot afford to meet the costs.

And with the devastating Toree Cutz, it claims it cannot afford to continue.

“Schools know already that there are sizeable further cuts to funding on the way – and whilst we are currently able to fund these additional needs – it will soon become more difficult and perhaps impossible to justify doing so,” says Prunty.

Good! You should never have started justifying this in the first place!

At Springwest Academy in nearby Feltham, which also serves a community with high levels of disadvantage, there are similar concerns. Pastoral mentors deal with calls day in and day out from families with worries about housing and finances; school uniforms and shoes are being paid for more frequently out of the school’s hardship fund and almost four out of ten pupils (38.3%) are referred for counselling or other mental-health support.

I've often scorned the pitiful attempts at budget cuts but it seems they are, finally, starting to have some effect. If only on getting state institutions to start reverting to what they are paid to do.

On The First Day Of Brexit, The Metro 'Letters' Page Gave To Me…

...baffled angry voters.

Losing Faith In Humanity...

He said: "We were walking down to the school and it's a narrow path. Jenson sat down which is the signal for me to stop because there is something in my way and I can go no further.

"I could hear a woman was getting a child out of the car, which was screaming and crying, and putting it in a pushchair. Jenson stood up and was a bit hesitant, and then I heard his jaws bang together and his teeth clatter and he yelped. I knew he had been kicked.

"He span round and round so I told him to lie down to calm him down. But then the woman ran the pushchair over his paws and he shot back up and yelped again.

She just carried on. "I heard someone say 'did you just see that, she just kicked a guide dog', so I know it was witnessed by people so I need them to come forward.

Jesus wept! Who watches a woman kick a man's guide dog and does nothing?

Exercise In Futility

Awais Kazmi, 29, of Broomfield Avenue, Leigh, was banned from approaching lone women in public for a period of five years after a court made a strict sexual harm prevention order on September 14.

He had carried out two indecent assaults on November 25, 2015, and December 16, 2015.

Essex Police later applied for the stringent order which prevented him from approaching lone women in public for a period of five years.

I bet you know what's coming next...?

The ban covered any lone female not previously associated with him, including on public transport or in shops, unless it is inadvertent or “not reasonably avoidable in the course of lawful daily life”.

But Southend Magistrates’ Court heard Kazmi breached the order just five days after it was made by walking up to a till worker in Marks and Spencer in Southend High Street.

Philip Pearson, prosecuting, said: “He started a conversation with her, saying she was nice and lovely. He had no intention of making a purchase of any goods. She found his behaviour harassing.”

Kazmi went into Clark’s shoe shop on October 4 and approached another shop assistant. He followed her around the shop, touching her arm and calling her pretty. Mr Pearson said: “She felt uncomfortable by his behaviour. He made no attempt to make a purchase on that visit.”

One does wonder about the wisdom of letting someone like this wander free.

Kazmi admitted both breaches, leaving him at risk of a prison sentence. However, Roger Neild, mitigating, said Kazmi is autistic and thought to have Asperger’s Syndrome and a learning disability.

So wouldn't he be better off locked away?

The solicitor added: “He now has a full understanding of what the order is and he has a full understanding of what he can and can’t do.”

Oh. Right. But he didn't before?

Magistrates’ handed Kazmi a 12 month community order, including 60 hours unpaid work and ordered him to pay £85 costs and an £80 victim surcharge.

He was also banned from Clark’s and Marks and Spencer in Southend for five years.

Well, that's done it. After all, no women work anywhere else in Southend.

Well, Pretty Sure It's Not The First Time...

...she's had her back doors smashed in..!

Ooooh, Let Me Guess....

....five guys named 'Mo', perchance?

Sunday Funnies...

Avril Lavigne is the only one I have ever heard of....

"Because It's OK When We Do It!" Part 587419

Armed police stormed a quiet rural village after a passerby mistook a pensioner's speed gun for a real weapon.

This one does at least look a little bit like a gun, despite being bright orange.

He claims Dorset Police have been aware of his campaign for some time and have asked him to stop before, although he is legally allowed to do it.

Well, why not? It seems to be OK for schoolkids, after all.

'They asked if I had been out with my speed gun that day and then started lecturing me.

There were about four policemen in each car and they were all carrying these big guns. It was very intimidating

'They radioed the helicopter to say "we don’t need you" and then moaned about the cost of them all coming out.

'I said the cost was nothing to do with me and that I hadn’t called them out.'

Police do get a bit irked about wasting police time sometimes. Odd, since they waste so much of it themselves.

In the months prior to this incident PCSOs had asked Mr Wallis to stop what he was doing over fears he could cause an accident.

Funny. They don't seem to worry about that when they want to run an approved campaign.

Police have also told him he needs to phone them to tell them when he's going out and that he must wear a high visibility jacket.

Clearly, these have some sort of mystical power.

Mr Wallis maintains he is acting within the law and said he would not waste money on phone calls or risk being accused of masquerading as a policeman.

No chance of that, Mr Wallis. You're actually out there, on the streets, doing something.

Gawd Bless The ECHR!

Two brothers who tortured two innocent young boys almost to death are attempting to protect their anonymity for life using the Human Rights Act.

Yes, it's this pair. You must remember them, it wasn't that long ago.

And of course, they are out - why would anyone be surprised at that? After all, according to the progressives, they were the real victims. Of their parents, society and the State, of course.

The brothers were locked up in separate units but were said to have been disruptive and had their privileges removed as punishment.

However, their lawyers now say that they have been rehabilitated and neither 'has displayed any aggression or violent behaviour in the community'.

You mean they were disruptive when faced with rules and consequences while behind bars (mild though they no doubt were) and are now free of those back with their fellow scum, so aren't causing trouble? Hmmm. I don't think that's the success story you claim it to be.

Last night the father of the older victim said he was incredulous that the brothers were using this section of the act to support their legal bid.

'They didn't give a thought to avoiding torture, inhumane or degrading treatment when they did what they did so it's taking the p*** for them to go to court arguing on those lines,' he said.

Indeed so. But that's the problem with having 'rights' that clearly have no tie to 'responsibilities'.

"But If They Do This, I Might Have No Purpose!"

Brighton and Hove City Councillor Michael Impkin-Leissner, who is German, said he was appalled to hear Europeans were being targeted by immigration officers.

"If this is what the British Government is doing it will destroy more relationships with Europe.

"If there are no criminal reasons and these people have committed no criminal offence - then this sort of action simply fuels hatred.

"This is absolutely unacceptable.

"In Germany we would never send Britons home like that.

"This is yet another of the very sad effects of Brexit coming through."

Good lord! What are they doing?!? Rounding people up to send to labour camps?

Ten rough sleepers are to be deported after being found living on the streets of Brighton and Hove last week, The Argus revealed.

 Oh. Is that all?

Argus readers also raised concerns that the Government strategy could mean that Irish members of the city's street community could also face the same fate.

Yes, please do! Who'd object to this?

Oh. Hang on:

Richard Williams, chairman of Brighton refugee charity Sanctuary on Sea, said it was "absurd" to say anyone comes to the UK with the intention of sleeping rough.

As absurd as thinking maybe you just don't want the sheep to start disappearing from your flock, eh, shepherd?

Natural History Writer Needed, No Experience Required..

Patrick Barkham sets a trap:

I bought a wire cage to see if I could catch a squirrel or rat to show my animal-mad daughter, Esme. Luckily she was at school when the door slammed on an adorable kitten.

Clueless about what I should actually do, for the first time in my life I called the RSPCA.

And just who is Patrick Barkham?

Patrick Barkham is a natural history writer for the Guardian and former feature writer.

/facepalm

They'd Be Better Off In Care...

A mother who claimed £47,600 in benefits illegally over six years has cried out in protest "My kids! Please!" as she was jailed.

Should probably jail them as well. It'll save time in the future, with role models like these...

The court had heard how Hill had started claiming benefits in 2005, at which point she was living as a single mother of one child and making her claim legally.

In 2009 her boyfriend, Richard Grant, moved in and he registered his business at the address and the couple had two children together, The Leicester Mercury reports.

/facepalm

James Bide-Thomas, prosecuting, told the court: "When she was interviewed she appeared to have made admissions of her understanding of the benefits system."

He added that Hill had previous convictions including robbery and a public order offence.

What a shocker!

Fernando Rodriguez, representing Hill, said his client had a long-standing drug and alcohol problem and that Mr Grant also had his "own problems with addiction".

Another surprise!

"She has entered guilty pleas as early as she could and is repaying at £50 a month with all parties in the household on benefits."

I'm no longer surprised. Paying it all back'll take .... *counts on fingers* ....

*speechless*

Welcome To The World Of The #Cyclopath...

...where some people's views that you'd be better off wearing reflective clothing are illegal.

Truly, they walk pedal furiously amongst us!

Sticking Plaster On A Gaping Wound...

Officers are regularly called to the town centre to deal with up to 15-strong gangs of teenagers taking drugs, carrying weapons and terrorising traders and shoppers.

From today, however, officers have put in place dispersal orders throughout the week, granting them special powers to deal with antisocial behaviour.

What's wrong with the ones they already have?

It comes after Sgt Ian Hughes, from the community policing team, found knuckledusters, a lock knife and drugs paraphernalia discarded in a bush. He said: “On the High Street there has been groups of youths causing issues. They are gathering in large groups near McDonald’s, they have been carrying out assaults, possessing controlled substances, possessing controlled weapons, and being nasty to shopkeepers and shoppers.

“We want to send out the message that this behaviour won’t be tolerated by either the police, the youth offending service or the street rangers, who will all be carrying out patrols.

“We can make them immediately leave the location and send them home.

“If they return within 24 hours, then they can be arrested.”

Utterly futile.

#Virtuesignalling Champ

Offered without comment.

You Don't 'Fall Into Crime'...

...any more than you 'fall pregnant'. It's a consequence arising from a deliberate choice:

Lucy Sweetland, mitigating, said Holden came from a good family and his mother was a vicar, but he had fallen into crime because of drug addiction.

She said: “He is acutely aware of the distress he has caused the victim.”

You mean, you are, and have told him what to say?

Miss Sweetland asked for Holden to be given another chance but Judge David Pugh said his 22 previous convictions for 40 offences counted against him.

He said: “There is greater harm in that there was the loss of items of sentimental value, but I am not satisfied that the degree of premeditation was significant in this case.”

He added: “You have a history of failing to comply with court orders. Unfortunately that history catches up with you today.”

Sadly, not in the way he deserves to have it catch up on him...

Holden was jailed for 12 months for the burglary and an additional one month for failing to turn up to a previous hearing.

*sighs*

It's All Going Down In Vange..!

Emergency response officers were called to Clay Hill Road, Vange, after several members of the public reported 40 people were fighting in the street with weapons.

Blimey! Must have been like the rumble scene in 'West Side Story' (minus the singing).

A man suffered a fractured nose and cuts and bruises to his head and face after he was struck with a children’s slide during a mass brawl.

Errr... Scratch that. More like the scene where the Avengers throw down with Loki's forces in New York.

PC Marek Jaworski, from Basildon’s community policing team (Ed: Oh, hai!), urged witnesses and anyone with information to get in touch as the attackers are still at large.

He said: “We originally got a call to reports of a fight involving 40 people with weapons near to Vange Hill Drive.

“A second call then came in to say that a man had been seriously injured in a fight.

“Our understanding is that there was a misunderstanding between a large group of people and he became injured. We still don’t know who is responsible for the attack.”

Really?

So, There's At Least 400 Cretins....

....wait, my mistake. 402:

The family of Lexi Branson, who was mauled to death by the family dog, are campaigning for "Lexi's Law" to stop the same thing happening again.

To stop chavs buying dogs? Good luck with that!

They want the law changed so in future people will have the right to know whether dogs might be dangerous.

We've been here before. And what I said back then applies once more.

Victoria Whiteman, Lexi's aunt, started an online petition on the UK Parliament website and so far nearly 400 people have signed it.

That's all? That's bugger all in lazy social media click-a-link terms!

The kennel warned Jodi that Mulan was not suitable for being around toddlers because of his tendency to jump up, but she bought him anyway.

What neither Jodi nor the kennel knew was that Mulan's previous owner had got rid of him because he had attacked another dog, leaving the owner fearing for his children's safety.

But he told the authorities Mulan was a stray so the dog would be taken off his hands.

What are they supposed to do, run a lie detector on people?