Well, Clearly, You Married The Wrong Type Of Man, Sweetie

A singer with a Swedish disco band who performed at this year’s Eurovision has told of the “dehumanising” and “distressing” consequences of Brexit after her British husband’s application to remain in Sweden was rejected.

It's not a vendetta against Brits, love. Sweden has fallen out of love with immigration and obviously doesn't want to have to make a value judgement about who deserves to stay. 

Their ordeal began three years ago when Solomons, who had been living in the country since 2012, learned from one of his British employees that he should have applied to remain in Sweden by the end of 2021. He quickly applied but was this rejected in August this year on the grounds that he was late.

Merkel Solomons said she felt embarrassed to be Swedish and could not understand the approach of the authorities given that Solomons is a fully integrated member of society, a stepfather to her two children, paying taxes and a Swedish speaker.

Should probably have married a drug dealer instead, love. They went soft on those for years.  

All those things - that we think of as good things - never counted for much before, and Sweden has reaped the whirlwind of that particular policy in the past. 

Signs Of Desperation From Remainers...

It's really not the most important drawback, is it? I mean, surely we can train up some English people to wield huge phallic pepper grinders and ask if we want more Parmesan?

Of Course It Is...

Government officials warned it was 'open season on ministers' last night as Health Secretary Steve Barclay became the latest senior politician to face bullying allegations. He was accused of 'bad behaviour' towards staff in the Department of Health and Social Care since being appointed last summer.

But allies and ex-colleagues of Mr Barclay denied the allegations and suggested civil servants may now feel 'emboldened' to 'go after' ministers they did not like.

Well, yes. If Sunak and Raab had stuck to their guns and showed a bit of backbone, they'd have had no choice but to back down. Or quit. 

Either way, win/win for the government. 

Sources told The Guardian that Mr Barclay – a former Government whip and Brexit Secretary – was 'constantly angry' and had 'blasted' staff, who in turn found him 'quite challenging'.

Boo hoo hoo! Toughen up, then. 'Challenging' should be in the job description at that level. 

Of course, we all know what's really driving this, don't we? 

As If It's Even Possible To Undermine This Profession Any More...

Daren Timson-Hunt targeted a woman wearing a summery dress on the London Underground as she went for a job interview last year.

Dad-of-one Timson-Hunt, of Broadstone Road, Stanford-le-Hope, was spotted by a police officer hiding his phone between his legs and taking a picture up the lady’s dress “four or five times”.

And what does this pervert do? 

Now a disciplinary tribunal has agreed not to strike off from being a lawyer again (sic). The tribunal accepted his argument that it was a “heat of the moment” decision as a result of work pressure and was instead suspended for six months.

Why is someone under such 'work pressure'..? 

The panel added: “It is clear at the time that the respondent was working very hard. He was working on the goods related aspects of Brexit and he told the Tribunal that it was not uncommon for him to work 80 hours a week.”

Wow! The list of things Brexit gets blamed for is off to a good start, isn't it? 

The tribunal heard he now does manual work and his earnings are limited and that he showed genuine remorse, but also undermined the profession in the eyes of the public.

I'm...not actually sure that's possible? 

Oh, That Old Chestnut Again...

*yawns* It's been tried, progressives. It didn't work then.


It's OK, we've got the recipes.

It's The Perfect Excuse!

Bus Stop, a Barbadian restaurant in North Road, Brighton, has closed its doors and called in the liquidators after suffering months of uncertainty as the country prepares to leave the EU.

Owners Danny O’Shea and Dominique Osoria said customers became wary of spending money on nights out with the looming split fuelling ongoing questions over the country’s financial stability.

Funny, looking around I can see plenty of restaurants still in business. Why aren't they similarly affected?

Were these owners people with a solid business plan and a good knowledge of the market?

Dominique and Danny ran restaurants in Barbados for more than 20 years before starting Bus Stop in Brighton.

Ah. Well, Brighton isn't quite Barbados yet.

They said Brighton and Hove businesses faced a number of challenges including high rents and rates, combined with high parking and train prices deterring customers from making the journey into the city.

All things that have been around a hell of a lot longer than Brexit. And so could have been factored in.

“The city council is always talking about how great it is to have all these independent businesses but when you work in the Lanes and North Laine and see how many are regularly changing hands it shows just how hard it is.

“The council wants these businesses but they need to do more to help them.

“Deliveroo is also having a big impact. They are great for the big chains, but for small businesses it makes it almost impossible to compete.

“We invested a lot into the business and have ended up having to go into liquidation.

“There wasn’t an easy way out.”

Some might say you're just looking to find an excuse...

Well, You've Actually Done It, Chuka!

A cross-party Parliamentary panel on social integration (APPG)...is chaired by Change UK MP Chuka Umunna.

Gosh! What amazing ideas is it - formed to 'bring together people from different generations' - going to come up with, with this intellectual powerhouse at the helm?

Supermarkets are being urged to introduce a new 1p charge to use self-service machines...

The panel... claims £30million could be raised by the scheme to help fund community projects.

The report is called 'Heal the Generational Divide', apparently. Hmm...

The report suggests divisions exist between older and younger people, particularly around Brexit, with research claiming that both the younger and older generations would be happy for the other to suffer if it meant getting their own way.

It also proposed schemes including a 'Take Your Headphones Off Day', tax breaks for care home volunteers and a national post-retirement volunteering scheme to bring together more people of different ages.

It is unclear whether or not Change UK will adopt the proposals as official policy...

Hmm, well. Let''s see what people think.

The corner shop worker, who lives in Dartford, Kent, said: 'On the face of it then it doesn't sound a bad idea. Nobody is going to say they don't want to help the elderly –it's a win-win.

'But I don't think it will go down well with the younger generations. And the idea that could bring people together to help solve Brexit is just ludicrous.

'I don't think that could be done by anybody if I'm honest. I'm not sure charging people for doing something that has become such an ordinary part of everyday life will work.'

Mick Potter, 72, said it was a 'crazy idea' to think it could help bring people together over Brexit.

The pensioner, of Eltham, said: 'The young ones won't like it at all. If you see young people in this day and age they wouldn't give up a seat for an elderly person or help us out – so I don't think they'd support this.

'The idea it could help Brexit as well and bring people together is a farce. We have become the laughing stock of the world.

'I'm not sure I want to vote at the European elections because of what a joke it all is. The idea that charging people to use a self-service checkout is funding projects which in turn brings young and old together over Brexit is madness.

'Nobody can do that. I think the divide is too wide. We had the vote and that's it. People say well it's the younger people that will be the next generation but the vote was carried out three years ago.

'Some people find those machines confusing enough without people having to pay to use them. How would that work? '

People are taxed enough. 'What if the supermarkets wanted to take a cut?'

Luke Pollard, 25, of Gravesend, Kent, was also using the Eltham Sainsbury's and was not impressed with the idea. The student said: 'Isn't that why people pay the government taxes?

'I don't see how that's right. I know it's only 1p but it's more the principle behind it and the logic. Why should Parliament be getting people to pay more all the time?'

Full-time mother Cheryl Toon, 35, said she did not see how the proposals would work. Cheryl, of Dartford, Kent, said: 'I know it's not a lot of money but I don't think it's a good idea. 'It seems like a supermarket tax. I can't imagine the supermarket companies are happy about it.

'Isn't there more important things to be thinking about? Why isn't more focus being put it on actually sorting out Brexit? Rather than charging people because it's not been sorted.

'It's going to be normal members of the public paying for this and it's not normal members of the public who have made a complete mess out of Brexit – it's the politicians.'

Well done, Chuka! You've actually brought the generations together after all!

They are united. In thinking you're a useless waste of oxygen, just like all the rest of the shower of shits in Parliament...

Not Good Enough For The Throne, Ma’am?

More than 1000 rolls of premium German toilet paper rejected by the Queen have been donated to a Croydon school.

Rejected by her personally? It must be like Izal!

German company Hakle sent 90 packs of bog roll to Buckingham Palace to ensure the monarch has access to one of life's necessities in case of a 'no deal' Brexit shortage.

Ah. I see.

After the palette was turned away by security due to safety fears (Ed: *boggle*), a staff member of the Dusseldorf based company suggested they should gift to Woodcote High School, based in Coulsdon, where her brother Peter Mack works as Deputy Head.

How cozy!

"Whilst it was done as a publicity stunt, there is a serious element to it.

"In case of a no-deal Brexit there is a real chance the UK could run out quickly, since we import far more than we produce."

If that's the worst that Brexit is likely to inflict, I think I'll survive...

Blind To The Truth

Why is it that this nation seems to care so little for its disabled, sick and elderly?

Really? Why does Ian Birrel think this?

When Iona woke almost five hours later, the carer gave her breakfast, bathed her and dressed her before the day could begin — just as she has done for almost five years working in our home. But this dedicated, supportive woman departs our team this weekend. She is going home to Poland.

Oh noes! What will you do then? Will you look after your daughter yourselves?

So we must resume the nightmare task of searching for replacements. Much of this burden falls on my exhausted wife, who fills any rota shortfalls for the long, waking nights alongside Iona before spending her days desperately seeking carers.

Oh, the poor darling! How terribly exhausting it must be to have to find hired help! Why, almost as exhausting as....errr, doing the work herself? For the fruit of your loins?

One friend told me of a superb care home in Plymouth where her aunt died in May, set in a beautiful former convent. It is profitable, highly rated —but faces closure due to staff shortages.

Oh, goodness me! Other people in Ian's social circle might be in the same boat! How terrible!

It is all very well saying Britons should do these jobs. But what if the right people are not applying to care for someone with complex needs or fail to turn up for interviews, as has happened with us.

You don't seem to understand, Ian. It's not the job of strangers to care for elderly or disabled relatives, whether they come from Latvia or Liverpool.

And it's not beholden on young people today to give up their dreams of law school or veterinary medicine or aerospace design so they can wipe the drool from your disabled daughter's chin so you and your wife won't have to.

Ism't it astonishing how the very people that tell us that the elderly and disabled are vital members of our diverse society who must be cherished are only doing so as long as they can hire someone else to do the hard work for them?

When You Just Can't Resist....

...shoehorning Brexit into everything...

Sore losers, much, 'Guardian'..?

"But If They Do This, I Might Have No Purpose!"

Brighton and Hove City Councillor Michael Impkin-Leissner, who is German, said he was appalled to hear Europeans were being targeted by immigration officers.

"If this is what the British Government is doing it will destroy more relationships with Europe.

"If there are no criminal reasons and these people have committed no criminal offence - then this sort of action simply fuels hatred.

"This is absolutely unacceptable.

"In Germany we would never send Britons home like that.

"This is yet another of the very sad effects of Brexit coming through."

Good lord! What are they doing?!? Rounding people up to send to labour camps?

Ten rough sleepers are to be deported after being found living on the streets of Brighton and Hove last week, The Argus revealed.

 Oh. Is that all?

Argus readers also raised concerns that the Government strategy could mean that Irish members of the city's street community could also face the same fate.

Yes, please do! Who'd object to this?

Oh. Hang on:

Richard Williams, chairman of Brighton refugee charity Sanctuary on Sea, said it was "absurd" to say anyone comes to the UK with the intention of sleeping rough.

As absurd as thinking maybe you just don't want the sheep to start disappearing from your flock, eh, shepherd?

Terrible Shortages You Probably Hadn't Noticed....

Rupa Huq in the 'Guardian':

I hate to say “I told you so” but we remainers were always sceptical when the pro-leave side promised that a vote to leave the EU would mean subcontinental chefs would be welcomed with open arms. Alas, the curry unions bought it.

Eh..?

The Economist has observed “The curry house is a British institution”. At the high watermark of New Labour, Robin Cook declared chicken tikka masala was the national dish.

Apparently, Rupa is terribly concerned that two curry houses close every week, which has everything to do with being unable to recruit chefs from India and Pakistan, and absolutely nothing to do with the ordinary pressures on other types of shop that close unnoticed by Rupa.

If a pizza shack falls in the high street, and Rupa doesn't hear about it, does it make a sound?

On the Today programme and elsewhere curry leaders accordingly came out for Leave, believing this was the only way to save their industry from extinction. I doubt that the curry constituency could have swung the result, but it was sorely misled. 

Really? Well. there's a lot of it going around, love...

Tell me again how people feel 'misled', Rupa...

Theresa May’s immigration minister declared that there are no plans to deviate from the long-stated strategy to have our own home-grown curry chefs rather than to import them. Just as Osborne said 12 months ago. No change there then.

How awful! How terrible, expecting British-born people to work in the curry house industry! What monsters!

*shrugs* *opens jar of Sharwood's curry sauce*

"Know Your Place, You Peasants!"

If the rule of law is to be upheld, it is vital that there should be an independent judiciary. This fact appears lost on Brexiter rabble-rousers. This voluble, influential political sect has unleashed gales of fury on the high court judges who ruled that only parliament has the authority to trigger article 50 of the Treaty on European Union, the legal route for Britain to leave the EU. Leading the charge are rightwing newspapers, which claim themselves to be champions of free speech and traditional British liberties. Yet since the Brexit vote they have sought to delegitimise their opponents’ views and silence them through intimidation.

Yes, that's the 'Guardian' op-ed this morning. The 'Guardian', the paper that went the extra mile to excuse the mob they helped to whip up in 2012, now criticising people who feel cheated over Brexit (but haven't done any more than express that displeasure vocally).

I'd laugh at the blatant hypocrisy, if I wasn't already so used to it...

I Wish I Hadn't Experienced Anything Like It, Love....

Yasmeen Sabri, 24, was putting the finishing touches to her £6,000 work when Mikaela Haze, 70, walked into the Royal College of Art in South Kensington and ripped the veil from its metal frame. Haze also screamed: “Saudi Arabia go home,” before knocking the sculpture to the ground on June 29.

Masters student Miss Sabri had spent six months creating the work, called Walk A Mile In Her Veil, for an exhibition to “promote tolerance and understanding”.

Today she said: “I’ve never experienced anything like it.”

Oh, c'mon! You must be familiar with the Turner Prize, where idiots are conned into declaring some load of old pony as 'art', surely?

Miss Sabri, originally from Jordan, has lived in London for six years. She said she had witnessed an increase in racially motivated crime since the referendum vote: “It’s obviously connected to Brexit. People are taking it as an excuse to be rude to others.

“It’s crazy. It’s not right. It’s a way to divide people. We are all human and it doesn’t matter if we were born under a different nationality or religion.

“It suddenly really feels like I’m not from this country. Obviously I’m not from this country, but I felt like I belonged in London and now it feels like I should go home.”

Don't let the door hit you on the way out...

Even The 'Guardian' Gaming Pages Are...

...having fits of the vapours over the 'Leave' victory:

*refills crystal goblet with progressive's tears*

Final Brexit Post...

...I've seen lots of elections and referenda come and go, but I can't remember one where the media canvassed the voters for buyer's remorse afterwards so hard. Can you?

...many voters have since spoken out saying they are shocked at the poll's outcome and did not believe their Leave votes would actually count.

Another voter, Mandy, said: “I was very disappointed about the result, even though I voted to leave, this morning I woke up and the reality did actually hit me. “But if I had the opportunity to vote again, it would be to stay.”

Other voters have also posted on Twitter that they regretted their decision to vote in favour of leaving the EU. One said: “I personally voted leave believing these lies and I regret it more than anything, I feel genuinely robbed of my vote.”

Another posted: “Urm I think I kinda regret my vote, I had no real reason to pick what I did!!”

Sadly, 5News have since deleted the video interview that was doing the rounds yesterday afternoon, showing one of our youth 'explaining' her remorse on finding out that voting has consequences, unlike so much of the rest of her life up until now. Pity.

Never mind. Every cloud has a silver lining:

 Hard to believe the 'Indy' went bust, isn't it?

Update: The 'Mail' has that video. 

Zoe Continues The Search For A New Electorate...

...because the current one disappoints her so:

The capital was diverse, and united: “I think it’s going to be a catastrophe for the UK, but also for the whole of Europe,” said Constanza, 28, who came here from Venice six years ago to study, and is now an interior designer. “If you ask me today, I probably will leave tomorrow, because I am really upset.”

 'You heartless monsters', thinks Zoe. 'How could you upset Constanza?'

Anders Carlsson, 25 and from Sweden, understands it better, seeing it as part of a pattern. “We have put up borders, you have to show a passport when you travel from Copenhagen to Malmö now. I think the past year, the refugees from Syria, Afghanistan, Iran, Iraq, I think people in Britain feel the same, that it’s too much.”

 Anders gets it. I wonder if Sweden might be the next to demand a referendum?

Marie, 26, who comes from France and does artwork for Playstation, was utterly dejected. “Maybe I need a plan B for my life. As hard as it seems, I’m a Londoner. I have no idea what’s happening in France. This is home. When you’re not allowed to vote, you already feel like you’re an under-citizen. I really see it as a beautiful wedding, and one day, instead of fixing the problem, the husband just leaves.”

Yes, Marie. After his needs and concerns have been blithely ignored for so long, he's got no other choice, has he? Now you have to pay your own way - hubby ain't buying your shoes any more.

In front of a hairdresser, Colin Smith, 46, originally from the outskirts of Glasgow, was also on the point of tears. “I’m gutted. I’ve got plans for my future and I feel like they’ve been ripped out of my hands. Not that I want Scotland to be independent, but if they go, I’ll be applying for a Scottish passport. I can’t believe this decision was ever allowed to happen.”

 You might think that's pretty rich coming from a Scot, but I couldn't possibly comment..

Linda, 36, came here from the Czech Republic 16 years ago and works in children’s services. “I don’t know what it will do to me as an individual. The contact and energy you get from people you meet, that won’t change. But on a legal level, of course [my status] will change. That’s what people were voting for, to make that difference. I want to see everybody’s vote on them …” “Like a tattoo, in or out?” I queried. “Yes.”

 A tattoo, to mark out 'the other'? Hmmm. That's a very European solution, if I may say so, Linda...

Grace, 24, was having the time-honoured breakfast of a Diet Coke and a fag. She’s from Derby and didn’t vote. “Because you didn’t care?” “No, I cared. I just couldn’t get hold of my polling card. I would have voted in.” Maybe next time we do this, we should try Scottish rules, and give a vote to everyone who lives here. Except, right. There won’t be a next time.

Oh, I don't know, Zoe. Never say never, right?

Quail Before The Wrath Of The Artists...

...expressed in, where else, the 'Guardian':

Lucy Prebble, playwright:

I feel nothing but rage. A horrible feeling – and one that helps me understand how these things start, when something important to you ends. I blame you, Cameron, a middle-manager of a prime minister whose ham-fisted leadership was based on one implicit stipulation not to fuck everything up...I hope my kindness grows back. Until then, I’ll call this “historically democratic event” what it was: a jostle for prefect fagged by racists.

Anish Kapoor, sculptor:

I am heartbroken. I hang my head. I feel shame, shame, shame at the xenophobia of this country. There are so many levels of division in Britain. And it’s all so unnecessary. I think the three men involved – Michael Gove, Boris Johnson and Nigel Farage – are despicable...How will this affect my art? Some anger does get in there. But what I feel today is mostly shame.

Andrew O’Hagan, author:

It is the revenge of the Brownshirts, a dictatorship of the illiterate and the opportunistic. I’m appalled.

Barrie Rutter, artistic director, Northern Broadsides:

What’s so awful about the vote is that it’s a leap into the dark – and for a while, it will only get darker...Look what Johnson has done to London: left it full of expensive flats, the money moguls have won. These people know the cost of everything and the value of fuck all.

David Lan, artistic director, Young Vic:

We need to start by feeling the depth of people’s fears about the quality of their lives and their future lives...Will the arts now be subject to new rules that inhibit and limit? Will it be harder to achieve the cross-border exchanges that enlighten and enrich?

*munches popcorn*

H/T: @QuietlyBritish via Twitter

This Article Tells Us More About The ‘Guardian’ Than About The Case For Brexit…

It’s always immense fun when the ‘Guardian’ sends one of its unlucky correspondents off to talk to people, and the prospect of Brexit provides us with a glimpse of how modern ‘journalism’ is conducted.

Eurosceptic Romford:

Electronic dance stars Underworld like to say the town of Romford in east London, where they are based, is their New York. But frankly, on the wet Wednesday my train from Stratford chugs into the town, I am struggling to see the comparison. Unless it is something to do with being mugged. I witness a near fight between a shopkeeper and a man fleeing from his store within about a minute of setting foot in the high street. … Justice (“What we don’t have a lot of,” he says when I ask him his name) is drinking tea from a union jack mug; I get mine in a mug with the flag of St George on it … Romford’s MP, Andrew Rosindell, who achieved instant fame in the 2001 general election when he campaigned alongside a staffordshire bull terrier dressed in a union jack waistcoat … “We should definitely come out,” says Katrina Woods, who is shopping in the market square with her friend Jane Verner. “We’re overcrowded as it is. We’ve got no houses for our own children. Or look at the way they’re treating people in hospital. You go down the hospital and you’re waiting hours. You’ve got old people left on trolleys. They haven’t got beds for them.” … When I ask for their names, they look anxious, fearing they have spoken too openly. But Webb reassures them. “Don’t worry,” he says, “nobody round here reads the Guardian.” Which, I discover later, is not quite true: Quadrant News in South Street has sold out – both the Guardians they get daily have gone. “They certainly soon go,” says the man behind the counter. It seems that even Eurosceptic Central has a few closet liberals.

So to sum up, Romford is a grey horrible town with ghastly flag-waving right wing people but there are some really nice ‘Guardian’ reads, so all hope is not yet lost.

Europhile Aberystwyth:

The largest town in Ceredigion is Aberystwyth, which has a population of around 13,000, plus another 11,000 students at the university, and after my day in Romford that is where I head, on a train that trundles amiably through the lovely countryside of mid Wales. The slate-grey skies of east London have turned blue; lambs gambol in the fields; the river Dyfi winds its way gently towards Aberdovey; the inviting beach at Borth hints at the possibilities of summer. … a former lady mayoress who tells me she was instrumental in twinning the town with Kronberg im Taunus in Germany (an odd twin since it is several hundred miles from the coast). Aberystwyth, she says, is proud of its twin cities in Germany, France and Patagonia. In Romford, no one had mentioned being twinned with anyone, and I fantasise that it stands proudly alone. But I discover later that it is twinned – with Ludwigshafen am Rhein in Germany and Hesdin in France. … Williams explains why his constituency is the most Europhile in Britain. “The influence of the universities [Lampeter to the south as well as Aberystwyth itself] is significant. We have been an enriched, cosmopolitan community for a very long time, and there are enduring links with the universities.” … you can’t go to any village or community in this constituency where there isn’t the European emblem up somewhere for a project that’s been directly funded by the EU.” … “I’m pro-EU,” says law student Rebecca Hopkins. “What are we going to do if we leave the EU? We lose trade, we lose immigrants, we lose everything. People shit on the immigrants that come here from the EU, but they give a lot more than they take. Ukip are clinging to a dead, decaying idea of nationalism. We’re not Great Britain any more. We don’t rule the world. We’re just a tiny island that needs to make positive relations.”

So to sum up, Aberystwth is a sunny, enlightened place with wonderful social justice-loving people who are the future of our nation, once we’ve shrugged off these awful hidebound nationalists. 

Journalism, eh?