Tuesday 16 March 2010

Kidnapping - Yr Doin It Wrong...

A severed thumb found in the street by a member of the public is that of a missing man, police said today.

Forensic tests showed that the body part, found in Ilford, north-east London, belonged to Mahmood Ahmad, who was reported missing on March 7.
Idiots! You're supposed to send the thumb to the family, not leave it in the street!

It also appears that Mahmood may be one of our hidden lizardmen overlords:
Detective Chief Inspector Melanie Burn, of Bedfordshire and Hertfordshire major crime unit, said: 'We are urgently appealing for any information on Mahmood's whereabouts.

'He may well be injured and need urgent medical help.'
Ummm, 'may well be injured'? You have his thumb!

What, you think it's grown back..?

9 comments:

Furor Teutonicus said...

Idiots! You're supposed to send the thumb to the family, not leave it in the street!

Probably left it for some civil servant, or other, to deluiver. You KNOW what THEY are like for loosing important digital information.

Anonymous said...

He's probably back in Pakistan / Bangla Desh. Maybe Mel can get a trip out of it. Lots of community leader liaising going on I'm sure.

Trevor said...

'Lots of community leader liaising going on I'm sure.'

No doubt RoboMel has already sent out for the samosas and mango juice.
That's what the council tax precept is for, isn't it?

Dave H said...

There was a KYTV sketch in which the unscrupulous station owner took a phone call in the middle of an interview. After few seconds of converstation he suddenly becaame exasperated with the caller and became so angry he forgot himself briefly:

'You utter fool. You were meant to post the ear and keep the child.'

Ross said...

"You KNOW what THEY are like for loosing important digital information"

#applause'

JuliaM said...

"You KNOW what THEY are like for loosing important digital information."

Thread winner! :)

"There was a KYTV sketch..."

Heh!

Edwin Greenwood said...

Bring me the thumb of Mahmood Ahmad.

No, sorry, can't visualize that as a major box-office success, somehow.

I wonder what the "forensic tests" were which identified the ownership of the severed part.

Furor Teutonicus said...

THAT will teach him not to thumb lifts from combine harvesters.

Anonymous said...

i hope that everything are going well
thinking about her family .
i know him and he was a good personn .

:'(