A triple bill this month!
Wednesday, 30 September 2020
Quote Of The Month
Nominated by CJ Nerd, it's Longrider on the 'Britain's Got Talent' George Floyd furore:
"As far as wanting to provoke a conversation, well, you got one. It just wasn’t the one you wanted. These people always say the same – they want a conversation, when what they mean is blind agreement with their right-on political views. If people don’t agree, then they get all upset about it. Well, tough. Try growing up."
Post Of The Month
I predict you will never read a better response to customer complaint than this one. Utterly masterful!
Brighton Should Twin With Berkeley, California...
The University of Brighton has appointed its first ever “activists in residence”.
Oh, really? Who are they?
Shona Raine and Ven Paldano...
Nicely 'diverse'. So, how much is this grant?
£2,000...
And what's it for?
*blinks*
Let me read that again...
...the Queer Trans Intersex People of Colour (QTIPoC) Narratives Collective Brighton.
*laughs hysterically*
Tuesday, 29 September 2020
We Need A Joint Enterprise Law For Dogs...
Bark n Fly day care centre told the Daily Record: “A senior member of the Bark n Fly team immediately took Lani to their vets where she was examined. Sadly, there was nothing they were able to do, confirming Lani had sustained a single fatal puncture wound through her intercostal muscles.
“As there had been no audible evidence of altercation between any of the four dogs in the field, it was accepted that there was no requirement to report the incident as one of the brutal or aggressive behaviour of any of the other dogs.
“All parties agreed that it was a tragic accident. It was impossible to say which of the three other dogs had caused the accident and, as a result, inform the owner of the dog responsible.”
So, because you can't identify which of the dogs (that you claim was in the field with the dead animal at the time) killed it, it's 'Oh well, shit happens'?
I hope the owner sues you into the ground.
I Guess There's Some Donkeys Even A Red Rose Won't Make Palatable...
...even to your own local party! 
A spokesperson for Leicester East Labour party criticised Webbe for failing to inform the CLP about the charges in advance.
“We are shocked at these developments. Since her election Claudia Webbe has chosen not to have had any dealings with the CLP. Against our express wishes she has remained an Islington councillor.
“We will support any action taken by the national party and the chief whip. The officers of the party will convene an emergency meeting to discuss these matters,” the spokesperson said.
Well, you could ask the Peterborough branch for advice, I suppose...
The Labour MP Claudia Webbe has been suspended from the Labour party after being charged with harassment of a woman over a period of nearly two years.
The MP for Leicester East insisted she was innocent after the Crown Prosecution Service (CPS) said she was accused of carrying out the offence between September 2018 and April 26 this year.
Better get ready!
Monday, 28 September 2020
Wait, What..?
*blinks* Seriously?
Dorset and Wiltshire Fire and Rescue Service (DWFRS) has created the 'Hazard House' to help educate children and families about the importance of fire prevention.
A number of fire and additional hazards have been placed around the virtual Hazard House which have been labelled with information highlighting the risk of household items, such as overloaded plug sockets, overheated laptops and candles left unattended.
It also includes real life stories from people who have experienced house fires as well as links to further resources.
What a world we now live in, eh?
The Justice System Is More Like 'Jackanory' These Days...
Sean Sullivan, defending, suggested there had been “tension” between groups of women earlier in the night.
He said: “She does not seek to excuse her behaviour. Whatever the individual cause, she failed to deal with it properly.”Well, that's one way of putting it, I suppose...
The court was told the attack was “out of character” as Marshall has no previous conditions. She has been dealing with mental health issues caused by a “traumatic” incident in her life.
Wait, isn't that 'seeking to excuse her behaviour', Sean? Gosh, it's like words have no real meaning for you, isn't it?
Mr Sullivan added: “She regrets her behaviour, which is highly unlikely to occur again in future.”
Until she gets drunk and decides her Mental Health Exemption Card hasn't expired, I guess...
The judge imposed a suspended sentence and ordered Marshall to complete 150 hours of unpaid work and ten rehabilitation sessions. Marshall was also banned from going to Anjelique Bar for two years.
Plenty of other bars she's able to go to, I suppose?
The judge said: “Two young women were assaulted in this bar, one with her eyebrow gashed.
“They will be wondering why on earth you are not going to prison. Most people in their shoes would think the same.”
Most of the public are thinking that too!
“This was a nasty and unpleasant attack which will leave one victim scarred for life.
“Your mental health had deteriorated because of an abusive relationship and an intensely traumatic incident when you were younger.
“That incident in your past will be worth discussing in order to address why you committed these offences.”
*sighs*
Sunday, 27 September 2020
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