Thursday 17 November 2022

She Doesn't 'Self Medicate', She's A Drug Addict

Defence lawyer Neil Ronan said: 'The first thing the defendant told me today was that she wanted the victim to know how much guilt and remorse she feels for what she has done.
It weighs heavily on her mind.
'Although she initially pleaded not guilty this was partly due to her lack of keen intellect and after she eventually changed her plea.
She is a single mother with three children, aged 21, 19 and 15. Her youngest is a particularly vulnerable child and would likely go into care.'

It might be the best thing that ever happened to the poor kid: 

'The defendant self-medicates with cannabis every night, partly to deal with her complex familial situation where she is the only caregiver. She also mentioned some admittedly vague incidents of domestic issues with her ex-partner.'

*rolls eyes* Even her brief seems embarassed to proffer such a tale... 

He added: 'She has been out of work since she fell pregnant at 16 and is currently in receipt of benefits. She has told me that she would like to compensate the victim as much as she can.'

How do you compensate a blind man for running him down on a zebra crossing because you didn't want your fish and chips to get cold? 

At Bolton Crown Court, Bellis admitted causing serious injury by dangerous driving and was jailed for a year and banned from driving for three years. The disqualification will start when she is freed in six months.

I suppose it's a miracle she's even going to do six months... 

6 comments:

APL said...

"..fell pregnant at 16..." That's not the way we were taught in school - back in the day. Still, I have to admire the British benefit system that allows for continuous "self medication" with cannabis, and having a car and petrol available to go out for prepared foods whilst running down pedestrians.

I also have to admire how she keep "falling pregnant" just often enough to ensure a 'child needing care' in the household. Wonder if the 21 and 19 year old children will ever work ?

Doonhamer said...

"fell pregnant" - sort of like catching flu, nothing you can do about it, and before the age of 16 she was employed in a career with glowing prospects. An architect petchance?

John Tee said...

I do so love that phrase "fell pregnant". Sounds like catching flu, it's just bad luck, nothing you can do to avoid it.

John Tee said...

Funny how three of us picked up on the same phrase! (While the other comments were in moderation.)

Anonymous said...

Ah now everybody, at least it was "fell pregnant" rather than the usual "was made pregnant" (by some unscrupulous male) but whether the 'accident' claimed, or 'being forced', at least it maintains her woman's basic/fundamental right to never, ever accept agency or responsibility for anything.

That that this accident occurred regularly, and was timed to 'just' prevent that most unacceptable of demands, that she get a job, was mere fortuitous happenstance.

That she can only afford to run a Ford Fiesta on her benefits is something we should all be ashamed of since most of the benefit scrotes in my locale drive Mercs.

JuliaM said...

"I have to admire the British benefit system that allows for continuous "self medication" with cannabis, and having a car and petrol available to go out for prepared foods whilst running down pedestrians."

*weeps*

"Funny how three of us picked up on the same phrase!"

😉

"That she can only afford to run a Ford Fiesta on her benefits is something we should all be ashamed of since most of the benefit scrotes in my locale drive Mercs."

*weeps harder*