I Don't Know Why They Call Them 'Thinktanks'...

...it seems there's little thinking involved:

Ministers are facing calls to abandon the “cruel and nonsensical” fines levied on tens of thousands of unpaid carers for unwittingly breaching earnings rules by just a few pounds a week. The Centre for Social Justice (CSJ), a centre-right thinktank, said the government should end the “persecution” of carers and accept that it was to blame for allowing overpayments to run up to huge sums, in some cases more than £20,000.

That's like saying we won't prosecute burglars if the homeowner has failed to apply all the locks on their back door.

The DWP should be able to identify when a carer’s earnings have exceeded the £151-a-week limit and notify them, but in many cases the government fails to do so, meaning people unwittingly rack up huge debts.

We all appreciate that rules are sometimes byzantine and complicated to follow (eh, Ange?), but let's not forget just who's money this is in the first place. It's the taxpayer's.

The former justice secretary Robert Buckland told the Guardian that the DWP “shouldn’t be treating these carers as criminals”, adding: “It’s utterly repugnant and wrong.” He said: “They need to accept they’ve made a mistake and accept the money is gone. Take it on the chin. The carers are going to be under immense pressure already and it’s not their fault. At the very least they [the DWP] could claw the money back over a long period of time so the carers aren’t put into immediate crisis. But it’s the DWP’s mistake so they should cover the lost money.”

And how would they do that, since any money they have is also our's? 

It's OK, Stephanie, They Have The Answers Down Pat...

Stephanie, 33, said social services 'will have a lot of questions to answer', adding: 'It makes you stick sick to your stomach to think what Alfie might have been subjected to behind closed doors. Why didn't social services do more before it was too late?'

After all, they've had so much practice over the years, haven't they?

The family was known to social services - not least because Howell had an order in place preventing him from staying at the house, which he routinely flouted. Neighbours also made repeated calls to police after hearing screaming and crying coming from both inside and outside the family home.

A safeguarding review will now explore what more could have been done to save Alfie.

The people in charge of preventing these cases should have done their jobs. There. That's your review. 

And if it seems like déjà vu, well, it's what's always said in cases like this, as the people in charge of preventing cases like these scramble to distance themselves: 

Det Ch Insp Harding said the case had not been referred to the Independent Office of Police Conduct (IOPC), because it "did not meet the criteria", despite officers' contact with the family.

If this didn't, what would? Maybe those criteria should change? 

Nigel Huddleston, MP for Mid-Worcestershire, described the case as "absolutely horrendous". "We must endeavour to learn lessons from Alfie's murder to help ensure that such a horrific event never happens again," he added.

Keep that phrase somewhere, Nigel, because I'd bet you (or some other MP) will be trotting it out again at the next preventable child murder. Just remember to cross out the name 'Alfie', eh? 

"He was just walking home from a club like we all do, they just got unlucky. They were five minutes from home and stabbed by some random guy.'"

'Just unlucky'..? Or let down once again by the failure of the authorities to act on mental illness? 

The suspect arrested by police is understood to be a 31-year-old West African national who has been living legally in the UK since his teenage years, and who has struggled with mental health issues.

It seems that while the mental health professionals are absent when needed, in the aftermath of yet another disaster caused by a mentally ill immigrant, they can swing into action after all: 

Education Secretary Gillian Keegan said: 'My thoughts and prayers are with the City of Nottingham following the devastating news that three people have lost their lives, including two students from @UniofNottingham.

'Support is available for students and staff and my Department stands ready to assist in any way we can.'

I guess consoling crying students is easier work than trying to section a violent man. 

But hey, let's not castigate the authorities too much. They do show some initiative. When it comes to silencing the bereaved: 

Barnaby Webber's maternal grandparents Phil and Jenny Robson, who travelled up from their home outside Exeter, Devon, said: 'We are still unsure what has gone on at the moment. 'Barnaby's parents are in bits as you can imagine but they are with officers from Nottinghamshire Police as we speak.

'We've been told not to make any comment until we know more. Perhaps in a day or two we can say more but at the moment we are not allowed.'

And you thought we had freedom of speech in this country, didn't you? 

Yet More Joined-Up Government...

So, you'd rather they smoked real cigarettes instead, as Tim points out?

/facepalm

The Department of Health and Social Care (DHSC) is trying to balance finding ways to cut underage vaping while at the same time ensuring vapes are available to help adult smokers to quit.

We are ruled by morons. 

The government has an ambitious plan of making England smoke-free by 2030.

The government has lots of ambitious plans. They backfire more than Wile E. Coyote's do...  

Finish Your Dinner Before You Start On Dessert...

Taking pictures down women's tops and creating 'deepfake' pornographic images without consent are to be made illegal. An amendment to the Online Safety Bill announced yesterday will give police and prosecutors more power to bring the abusers to justice.

Gosh, more crimes, eh? It must be great to have done such a great job on all the existing ones that you can.... 

Oh, wait....

Maybe You Should Look Elsewhere...

...it's not the public who are causing the biggest issue, is it?

H/T: Ian J via email

Those Wheels Of Justice Are Grinding Slower...

A man has been jailed for 10 months for submitting fake details to the home office to gain the right to live in the UK.

So the punishment for this is...to keep him here another 10 months? 

On December 12 2013, Mohammed Miah, of London Street, Whitchurch, submitted fraudulent details to the home office, in the name of Shafique Miah. As he was not a British citizen, he therefore obtained leave to remain in the UK by deception, contrary to the Immigration Act 1971. Furthermore, the 67-year-old was found to be in possession of a Bangaldeshi passport on June 30 2022, also in the name of Shafique Miah, which was “improperly obtained”.

Why not kick him out now? 

H/T: Ian J via email

Saved By The Bell(ends)...

Flagship plans to clean up the internet may be dropped by the Government, it emerged last night.

The Online Safety Bill had been due to go before MPs next week but has now been removed from the agenda. There will not be time for it to return to the Commons before the autumn – and it could then be ditched entirely if the new prime minister chooses to prioritise other new laws.

Oh dear, how sad, never mind... 

Whitehall sources blamed Labour attempts to hold a confidence vote in the Government for the lack of time available for the Bill, which aims to introduce powers for tech giants to be hit with huge fines if they fail to keep users safe.

Ha ha ha ha! You couldn't make it up, could you? 

The right people are squealing like stuck pigs, of course: 

Campaigners were last night dismayed, with Andy Burrows, of child protection charity the NSPCC, saying: 'The Online Safety Bill is a crucial piece of legislation that is fundamentally about protecting children from harm and abuse that is taking place on an industrial scale on social media.

'Any delay will mean families continue to pay the price for the failure and inaction of tech firms who have allowed harm to fester rather than get their house in order.'

No, mostly, they'll pay the price for not doing any parenting.... 

Shutting The Stable Door...

Ministers intend to give Companies House powers to verify company information.

...after the Hungarian horses (and zebras!) have long since galloped over the horizon:

... locals in Wales's most northerly village were surprised to learn that seven firms claiming to be setting up 'botanical and zoological gardens' or 'nature reserves' were registered there over eight days last month.

*blinks* 

A Mail on Sunday investigation can reveal that Cemaes is the latest place to fall victim to a soft-touch system that lets anyone create a business in the UK without proof of identity.

Good grief!  

The Cemaes firms are among 17 registered with Hungarian directors last month for 'botanical and zoological gardens and nature reserves activities'.

And no-one noticed? Not that it would have mattered much if they did... 

A spokesman said it refers potential fraud to law enforcement agencies, adding: 'At present Companies House don't have statutory powers to investigate fraud and verify the accuracy of information provided by UK companies.'

*sighs* 

Bringing You Tomorrow's Quietly-Shelved Government Report Today...

Measures are being introduced to try to identify what is driving rising murder rates in the wake of a spike in teenage deaths in some of the UK’s homicide hotspots.

Gosh, it's a riddle wrapped in a mystery inside an enigma, isn't it? 

Every government agency involved in the victim’s life – health services, local authorities, children’s services, probation, and even voluntary groups – will contribute to an examination of what went wrong and consider how to identify the signs of a life at risk.

Maybe the fact that all of those agencies are 'involved in your life' might be one, who knows? 

Lib Peck, director of London’s VRU, said: “It’s absolutely crucial that we learn the lessons now that might help us make a lifesaving intervention in another young person’s life.”

When this report draws the inevitable conclusions it cannot help but draw, I predict it'll never see the light of day... 

H/T: G Elvidge via Twitter

Double Standards...

Chelsea Kirtley was changing her 11-week-old son Theo’s nappy in 2017 when she spotted a mark on his stomach. Three inches long and pinkish-brown, Chelsea panicked.

Holly Kobayashi was suspected of harming her eight-day-old baby, Adventure, after he developed a bruise the size of a 5p piece on his left arm in September 2017.

And both women were totally innocent: 

It was only after she sought a second medical opinion that Theo was diagnosed with hypermobility — a genetic condition that can cause skin to break or damage easily, which had caused the mark on Theo’s stomach.

It took four months for Social Services to conclude that the bruise had been caused by accident.

So...how on earth do stories like this one happen? Why do social services turn a blind eye to cases like this, and go in like gangbusters on middle-class Englishwomen?

Was it 'cos they is white?

Abandon All Logic, Ye Who Enter Here!

Another day, another mask u-turn?

The Health Secretary said last week: 'You do need to wear a face mask in Pret because Pret is a shop. If there's table service, it is not necessary to have a mask.

But in any shop, you do need a mask. So, if you're going up to the counter in Pret to buy takeaway that is a shop.'

The longer you spend in the shop, the less you need to wear a mask? Is it me, or....has he got that the wrong way round?

I mean, seriously, if anyone knows what the possible medical or scientific reasoning behind this is, then please, do enlighten me!

But the Prime Minister's official spokesman later said: 'We will be publishing the full guidance shortly but my understanding is that it wouldn't be mandatory if you went in, for example, to a sandwich shop in order to get a takeaway to wear a face covering.

'It is mandatory ... we are talking about supermarkets and other shops rather than food shops.'

They really are just making it all up as they go along, aren't they?

Left Hand, Do You Know What Right Hand's Up To...?

Left Hand: "Sure, the same as me, making sure everyone's muzzled in shops! Right..?"

Right Hand: "Errr..."

/facepalm

Some Light At The End Of The Tunnel...

A new body promised by Theresa May to tackle “deep-seated societal injustices” has never been convened and never will be, the Observer has been told.

The former prime minister’s pledge to create the Office for Tackling Injustices (OfTI) won praise from inequality campaigners, who said it was an important part of the battle to reduce opportunity disparities over race, gender, deprivation, sexuality and disability. The chair of the new office was also announced when May unveiled the plan last summer. May, who in her first speech as prime minister in July 2016 pledged to fight against “burning injustice”, said she wanted it to hold “government and wider society to account”.

However, more than eight months after May revealed the plan, the office has never been convened – with some of those involved believing it will never be established.

It'd take a heart of stone, wouldn't it?

Why Try To Run When You Haven't Mastered Walking?

The NSPCC has called on the Government to make sending sexual messages to children illegal as disgraced footballer Adam Johnson makes a second appeal against his conviction for child sex offences.

Excellent timing, NSPCC!

And you'd think they had more important things to worry about, wouldn't you? 

This must be that 'joined up government' people are always saying we need...

More Calls For More Pointless Legislation

A pensioner has been left too traumatised to go out after her dog was mauled by a runaway Staffordshire bull terrier. Boss the 8-year-old springer spaniel needed stitches to his shoulder after being savaged, leaving owners Marilyn and Eric Jones with a vets bill of £430.

What will solve this problem? MOAR LEGISLATION!

Now a councillor has taken up the case and wants legal measures introduced to make it an offence to have dogs off the lead anywhere within the boundaries of Gnoll Country Park.

So…what sort of owners were involved on the attacker side?

Mrs Jones, who lives in Cimla, took Boss for a walk and was heading towards the Gnoll Woods, near Cimla Common, when the incident happened. She said the bull terrier's owner was there with another man and both were drinking from cans of beer.

I’m getting a picture of them, and it isn’t labelled ‘responsible owners who will obey laws’…

"I did report it to the police but they said there was nothing they could do because it had not attacked a person."

So that makes you hopeful for any future enforcement of any new legislation, eh?

Joined Up Government!

Equalities minister Lynne Featherstone has launched a 12-page guide aimed at tackling youngsters’ body hang-ups.

And yes. It’s just the sort of twaddle and contradictory lunacy you’d expect from her.

It warns parents that comments about weight and body shape, as well as airbrushed images of celebrities, are damaging children’s self-esteem.

*sigh*

A series of practical tips for ‘promoting a healthy body image’ urges parents to look at magazines and TV adverts with their children and point out where images are likely to have been digitally enhanced.

Do you really think Sharon & Tracey are capable of the awesome deductive skills required for this?

They are also told to refrain from praising prettiness or thinness, comparing youngsters to celebrities or teasing them about their weight.

In further advice, which is likely to trigger claims of fuelling the nanny state, the online guide advises parents to ‘try not to complain about parts of your body you don’t like’.

‘Although it is difficult to feel confident about your body all the time, by appearing to be neutral or positive about your own appearance, you will be helping your child to develop their own body confidence,’ the pack says.

Does ‘sticking your head in the sand’ similarly qualify as good advice for any other issues?

If a child complains ‘I’m fat’, parents should ‘discuss body diversity and how the beauty ideals they may be relating to lack diversity’.

I can haz English translation, plz?

Mrs Featherstone said: ‘Young people are being set an impossible standard by images in media and advertising which can erode their self esteem.

‘As parents, we are often aware of these issues, but may not have the advice and guidance we need to talk to our children.

‘I want the pack to empower parents to have those difficult conversations.’

Tell you what, Lynne, why don’t you pop along to your counterparts in the DoH and stop them sending out these letters, if you’re really so concerned about ‘body issues’?

It’ll do a lot more good than your wonderfully-informative guidance document free budgie-cage liner…

Is It All Just About Ticking The Boxes?

Simon Leftley, corporate director for adult and community services at Southend council, said: “In many cases, particularly with the victims of domestic violence, many adults will refuse any offers of help or assistance.

“While we must respect the right of adults to make independent decisions about their lives, we also need to ensure that appropriate checks and balances are in place.”

Good luck squaring that circle, then, Mr Leftley.

Why not just accept some people cannot be helped, no matter what 'the authorities' do?

Or do really you just want to ensure that the i's are dotted and the t's crossed next time?

Latest 'It's All The Fault Of The Middle Classes'...

There's a crisis in discipline in schools:

Members of the Association of Teachers and Lecturers will point out that disruptive pupils and their parents face almost no consequences for their actions.

They will spell out how teachers are routinely interrupted and sworn at, and sometimes assaulted, by pupils who have never been taught to give and take.

Other pupils turn up to school 'dead tired' because they have been allowed to stay up late.

So, they are calling for the reintroduction of proper discipline in schools, right?

Wrong:

A generation of well-off pupils is failing to accept the authority of teachers because they are used to being indulged at home, according to Dr Mary Bousted.

Her union will next week debate a motion calling on the Government to dock the child benefit of parents who fail to discipline their children and to force such mothers and fathers to attend parenting classes.

Wait, what?

You can't maintain discipline in the school, so you want to discipline the parents? Who are, of course, 'mostly' those dreadful middle classes?

Speaking before the ATL's annual conference next week, Dr Mary Bousted, the union's general secretary, said parents had a duty to ensure their children were brought up understanding 'where proper authority lies' and 'how they should behave in school'.

She added: 'It's often the well-off middle-class who buy off their children through the computers and televisions and everything which isolates them within the home.

'And then they are surprised when their child doesn't come to school ready to learn.'

The ones that only yesterday we learned should be discouraged from early education in favour of the disadvantaged?

Make your minds up!