Is It Possible He's Even Worse Than Dick..?

He certainly hit the ground running. And now he's picking up speed:

Scotland Yard’s new Commissioner is consulting officers over a proposal to make every constable swear allegiance to King Charles III. Under UK law, all serving police officers must take the oath in which they swear to truly serve the monarch with ‘fairness, integrity, diligence and impartiality’.

Wait, surely they don't have to do it over again? 

Reader, of course not... 

There is no requirement for existing officers, who swore allegiance to the Queen, to retake the oath because it passes to the heir in the event of death.

So why, in the midst of taking over a new role when his officers are about to revolt over his craven acquiescence to the demands of race hustlers and are being stabbed in the streets by maniacs, is he - you should pardon the pun - dicking around with something like this? 

The Commissioner, who is embarking on a period of major reform at the Met, told rank and file officers that he had found it ‘very powerful’ when he was sworn back into office as he took the helm at Britain’s biggest police force on Monday.

The man's ego is far bigger even than his predecessor's if he thinks for one moment that this is something that should take up valuable police time in the coming months. Not to mention the time it will take from the magistrates who have to administer the oath.

Don't Bother To Ask Me, Demon Internet...

...the answer's 'Yes':

All 20million families with internet connections are to be forced within months to say whether they want access to online pornography.

No, not because I'm addicted to pornography (though I confess, I'm currently reading the last couple of John Norman 'Gor' books, published under my radar last year!), not even because there are no children in the house, but simply because I know only too well that this kind of blanket ban will sweep up many perfectly legitimate sites in its wake.

After all, when O2 implemented these controls a few years ago, my phone stopped accessing many local newspaper sites and is still unable to access some blogs until I got round it by installing Onavo, which functions as a VPN.  

Adult content filters are also expected to be fitted to all new mobile phones automatically.

Only an adult will be able to change the filter settings and the account holder will receive a confirmation email. Some providers are also offering text alerts, in case children hack into the account.

/facepalm

Mr Cameron has argued that web firms have a ‘moral duty’ to act but have not been ‘doing enough to take responsibility’.

He said: ‘I made a promise in July that I would take action to help parents protect their children when online at home and we are now delivering on that promise.’

What a pity you didn't decide on a far more important promise to honour, then...

‘As a dad, it is very simple: I want to know my children are protected when they go onto the internet. A family-friendly filter gives me the tool to do that and so this is a really important step forward by the internet service providers.

‘We all need to work together, both to prevent children from accessing pornography and educate them about keeping safe online, and I will continue to ensure this happens.’

I don't need to 'work to keep children away from pornography', you massively-foreheaded cretin - that's their parent's job.

The Three Pillars Of… Err….

Arnie Graf and Jon Cruddas attempt to re-launch Labour. As expected, it hits the harbour wall, breaks in two, and sinks:

On the doorstep and in meetings around the country, people are telling us that what matters to them is their family, the work they do and the place they live in.

All of which Labour, when last in office, did their level best to change!

There is visceral anger towards the big six utility companies, and rising resentment over the price of transport. Many people are having to devote five days of working every month just to meet the cost of getting to work.

Yes, for people who forget that the companies that provide utilities and transport are businesses, and expect to turn a profit. They also invest in their chosen areas in order to do this. There’s no magic gas tree!

The cost of rent is becoming prohibitive for many people, taking up 50% or more of their monthly pay. Buying a home is getting beyond hope, especially for their children. Food costs are rising, and university fees are despairing for many.

More to the point, the university degrees they send you off with are worthless…

So family integrity is one pillar of a one-nation Britain, which is why in government Labour will cap energy prices and back up our campaigning against payday lenders with a levy on their profits and a cap on the cost of their loans.

And the companies will just absorb this, will they? They won’t pass it on to their customers, and so make the interest rates even higher?

Work to support our families is a second pillar. This is about self-respect and dignity: austerity without strategies for growth and work is dooming a whole generation who do not know about the importance of work in their development as full human beings.

Yes, we call that generation ‘Labour voters’. You expect to convince us you want to cut that pool?

In government we will support the living wage campaign with make-work-pay contracts to help businesses raise wages for millions of workers.

Which, again, will be passed on in higher prices for others. Really, can no-one see how this is going to affect things?

The third pillar is a place to belong. We see the empty shops, the potholes, the betting shops and the legal loan sharks in the high streets we campaign on. These places smell of decay. It is hard not to feel a sense of loss and concern for the future when we walk these streets. And we hear the anger about immigration. People are not anti-migrant, but to them immigration is the cause of rapid social and cultural changes that leaves them not knowing where they fit in. So Labour will make sure everyone in Britain can speak English, the language that binds us together as a national community.

And if, like Farhia, they don’t plan on learning it? Are you going to set up re-education camps?

One-nation Labour is for family, for getting Britain working again, and for community. It means doing politics in a new way. Not the old top-down transactional politics of doing things to and for people. But a bottom-up transformative politics of the common good that gives people the power and responsibility to take more control of their lives, their work and their communities.

Fine words, though they ring utterly hollow when set against the last Labour regime, which created exactly the conditions you now rail against..

Meet The New Boss...

Health Minister Anna Soubry, on her way to Downing Street for a hard day's work worrying about what other people put in their mouths...

...just exactly the same bossy, obnoxious, tinkering Nanny State cow as the last boss, the one you thought you'd managed to vote out of office...

Cakes and croissants have doubled in size in a generation adding to Britain’s obesity problem, health minister Anna Soubry claimed today.

Launching a fresh attempt at clearer food labels advising shoppers on calories and fat content, Ms Soubry said supermarkets and manufacturers also had to make it clearer when a ready meal is meant for more than one person.

Obesity and poor diet cost the NHS billions of pounds every year and the Department of Health claims voluntary deals with big food companies is the best way to influence what we eat.

'Voluntary'. Yeah. Sure they are. At the moment...

Bernie Two Dads: Every Bit As Useless & Obsessed With Appearances As Sir Ian Blair

Police recruits to Britain's largest force were banned yesterday from having visible tattoos in a sweeping reform of its public image.

Scotland Yard Commissioner Bernard Hogan-Howe said body art that can be seen by the public 'damages the professional image' of the service.

Really? According to whom? Have you ever been asked, or polled?

No. Me neither.

And he ordered a 'tattoo amnesty' in which anyone who already has marks on their hands, neck or face must declare them within weeks or be sacked.

Ummm, if they are visible, don't they already count as 'declaring themselves'?

But rank-and-file representatives claim associating tattoos with criminals is old-fashioned and police should reflect the public they serve.

Well, quite! Just try Googling the phrase and see what you get! It drips from the lips of politician and union member, pressure group leader and civil servant alike.

'It will be a requirement, by the Commissioner, that all officers and police staff with existing tattoos defined as 'visible' must register such tattoos as a formal written declaration to their line manager before November 12.'

Why can't their line managers just look at their staff and note down the tattoos? Are they all blind? Or is that a loaded question right at the moment?

Met officers have already questioned how officers from islands in the South Pacific where cultural tattoos are common will be affected.

Do we get a lot of those, then? I suppose we would if the top brass thought it would help their diversity scores!

And they highlighted that many servicemen may find they are unable to join the police after leaving the Armed Forces.

Ah, now, I suspect that's not something that'll worry Bernie and his cronies - in fact, the useless top brass probably consider it an advantage, preferring straight-out-of-university, easily-moulded footsoldiers!

Of course, if Bernie was really worried about public image he'd just make sure all his Taser-wielding officers had gone to Specsavers...

No-One Told Them The Party’s Over…

The Department for Environment, Food and Rural Affairs handed Linstock Communications over £45,000 to raise awareness of the new law among travellers.

It incurred the huge bill despite having a large public-relations team of its own.

This is despite the fact that travellers just ignore any laws they don’t feel like complying with anyway.

North Lincolnshire Council’s Trading Standards is to advise takeaway owners about how they can reduce the amount of salt and saturated fat in the food they sell.

Despite the fact that, as Leg-Iron points out, the wheels appear to be coming off that initial ‘salt is bad!’ theory thanks to new research.

Why, you'd almost think we never had a change of government at all, wouldn't you?

Only Men..?

Men accused of beating their wives face being banned from their homes for up to four weeks – even if they have not been convicted of any crime.

Under ‘go orders’ police will have the power to stop alleged abusers returning home or having contact with the victim.

After that initial 48-hour order, the courts will be able to extend the ban for up to 28 days.

Why only men? Is this poor wording from the 'Mail', or are we really about to introduce a law that uniquely favours one sex over the other?

What about battered husbands? They have to just put up with it?

And how's the law going to apply to gay couples, male or female?

The orders were made law by Labour Home Secretary Alan Johnson in one of his last acts in office, but were never brought into force. In August it was reported they had been scrapped as part of public spending cuts, which will see the Home Office budget cut by 23 per cent over the next four years.

And just when you thought sanity had finally reigned, along comes the new, shining hope in the Home Office to remind you that whoever you vote for, a politician gets in...

But they have been resurrected by Home Secretary Theresa May as part of a series of measures aimed at tackling violence against women.

I suspect that this is yet again another triumph for the coterie of poisonous feminists that seem to have the ear of the lawmakers.

After all, as Angry Exile points out, it's apparently OK with them to ignore blatent injustices as long as they are directed at the 'right' sex....

"The question is," said Humpty Dumpty, "which is to be master -- that's all."

Thousands of criminals with serious mental illnesses or drug addictions will no longer be sent to prison...

Hurrah!

That's certainly promising, at least in the case of the mentally ill. I'm not so sure about the drug addicted. Is that the cause of their criminal behaviour, or merely another symptom?

But I've long said that prison isn't the place for mentally ill offenders who cannot control their behaviour. Instead, committal to...

Oh. Wait.

...but will instead be offered "voluntary" treatment in hospital, under controversial proposals to be unveiled tomorrow.

How can it possibly work is it's voluntary?

Oh, well. At least it'll be secure. Won't it?

The Ministry of Justice will publish details of plans to divert offenders from jail to secure NHS units...

Whew! Thank god for th...

Oh:

...but will admit that they will be free to walk away.

Okay. Clearly, we are through the looking glass here. Just how the hell do they define the word 'secure' then?

Officials define "secure" as having a grip on the individual, rather than locking them up.

What does that even mean..? Anyone? Bueller?

This is, of course, the brainchild of that useless lump of spare tissue attached to the coalition, Ken Clarke, our so-called justice secretary. Short of appointing Juliet Lyon and her cohorts at the Penal Reform group, it's hard to see how iDave could have made a worse choice....

He will argue that the plans will provide the most effective way of cutting reoffending rates. The Ministry of Justice revealed last week that 61% of prisoners are reconvicted within a year of release.

It's hard to see how, Ken, you waste of skin, when no-one will be able to keep them long enough to achieve that...

Of course, the bleeding hearts are already hailing him as a man whose genius is unrecognised by us flawed taxpayers:

Dominic Williamson from the charity Revolving Doors Agency said there was an opportunity for improvement in the system if ministers recognised that offenders often had complex needs arising from drug and alcohol addiction and mental health problems.

What about our complex needs? The need for a life unmenaced by the untreatable mentally ill and predatory drug addicts?

"I think community-based treatment as part of a sentence would work for a lot of people as long as there is a clear pathway once they leave. What happens in prison is that people receive treatment but then they are kicked out and go into the community where there is nothing for them," he said.

What should there be for them? What do they deserve from society, other than their freedom when they've served the court-appointed sentence for their crimes?

The coalition is going to get absolutely hammered on the law and order front. And they'll only have themselves to blame....

*Yawn*

Criminal gangs who cheat the taxpayer out of billions through benefit fraud face a lifetime ban on claiming welfare under a new crackdown.

This didn't result in the screaming and wailing and rending of garments you'd expect, when it made the news last week. Probably because EVERYONE realised it was utter bunk...

Minister for Welfare Reform Lord Freud said officials will use the latest technology to cross reference Government and consumer computer databases to identify emerging patterns of fraud.

Mmmm, government computer systems. Suuuuure they will....

Speaking yesterday at the Institute of Revenues, Ratings and Valuation annual conference, Lord Freud said: ‘We will put a stop to the fraudsters who infiltrate and steal money from our benefit system. Criminal gangs and identity fraudsters who persistently steal money meant for the poorest and most vulnerable people in our society will be severely punished.

‘We will track them down using the latest technology and when they have been caught and prosecuted, we will strip them of their assets and ban them from claiming benefits for long periods.

‘Arguably that should be for life in the most serious cases. If the gangs have come from abroad, we will deport them.

‘We are launching a major new initiative to fight organised benefit crime – one that not only prevents fraud, but detects, punishes, deters people from going down this criminal path.’

You'll deport them, eh? Really? You are aware that if they are from the EU, you can't do that?

The Department said the rules, to be unveiled over the next few weeks, will target organised criminal gangs and identity fraudsters rather than punish those who are simply baffled and genuinely misunderstand the system.

Oh, I don't doubt that that's what you intend. But these initiatives and projects always, somehow, end up targeting the very people you claim you don't mean to target, don't they?