Let Me Guess, He 'Can't Work', Yes?

Clay receives disability living allowance, because of damage to his spinal chord (sic).

He seems to be quite active for someone with such a disability....

Jeremy King, prosecuting, said: “Police were called and on arrival he was outside the block of flats.

“He became abusive towards other residents, and police were concerned for his well being as he had been treated for smoke inhalation.

“The officers followed him across the road, and when they spoke to him he was shouting and swearing.

“Then suddenly he told them ‘try some of this’ to PC Trotter, he lunged over and headbutted the officer.”

Naturally, the magistrates stopped short - but only just - of giving this waste of oxygen a handout from the poor box:

Magistrate Mark Linford sentenced him to a conditional discharge for the next year, but told Clay to pay £50 in compensation to PC Trotter.

Mr Linford said: "Normally we take the offence of assaulting a police officer very seriously. You have been here before and been sent to prison for it."

"But we don't want to give you that...."

"We have looked at your record, it is unimpressive, but for the past two years it has been clean. There were distressing circumstances in this case. You snapped for a moment, but were immediately remorseful.

"So we are going right outside our sentencing guidelines. If you manage to continue your excellent work and stay out of trouble, then this assault will be wiped in a year's time.

"We are putting a lot of faith in you, as we are impressed by how you have been over the past two years."

It's easy to 'put a lot of faith' in someone, when you aren't the person that will face any consequences should it be misplaced...