What The Kiddies Are Doing In School (When They Aren't Learning To Read And Write And Add Up)..

What links the growing use of emergency food banks in the UK with the rise in the amount of food we throw away?

Ummm, absolutely nothing..?

The answer is an innovative idea cooked up by Bristol pupils.

Students from Queen Elizabeth Hospital in Clifton have developed a clever solution aimed at reducing the mountains of grub going to waste every year, while helping deliver more meals to food banks.

They say online supermarket customers should be given the option of sending one of the items they buy through 'buy one get one free' (BOGOF) deals directly to food banks. Using the new facility, customers would simply have to click on a box to send the second item in the BOGOF deal to a food bank.

And it would be magically transported to them at no cost on a cloud of unicorn farts?

They believe big supermarkets such as Sainsbury's and Tesco could deliver the donated items to food banks on a daily basis. The pupils say the 'Buy One Give One' (BOGO) idea gives customers an alternative to dropping food off for food banks at stores.

Ah. Of course. For free.

To cut out that whole tedious business of doing it yourself. Get Big Business to do it instead! Their time is free and won't be added on to your next bill, of course...

It was dreamed up by a group of nine pupils in Year 8 and Year 9 as part of a 'Future Problem Solving' project. The children look at global issues and learn a six-step process to work at solving them.

W...T...A....F?!? Id this sounds like a hideous pile of socialist wank, that's because that's exactly what it is. And the little moppets are, of course, lapping it up:

In a letter to Tesco, one of the students, Alfie Poynter, said: "I saw first-hand that people need food banks to survive. The people that go to foodbanks are just normal people but they need this place in order to get food for whatever reason.

"We are really excited at the prospect of food banks being helped by grocery chains like you, providing a facility for people to donate while they do their weekly shop online."

*speechless*

Bronnie Kenchington, the school's head of learning enhancement (Ed: …) at the school, said BOGO was a simple but effective idea. She said: "In their research they found out that much domestic food waste comes from BOGOF offers where people buy fresh produce, take the free item and often never use it and throw it out, rotted.

"This brought about a discussion on how wrong it was for good food to go to waste when people in UK have food shortages."

So, when you ponder the dismal exam results next time, content yourself with knowing that our schools are busily churning out the next generation of Low Information Voters, eh?