Tuesday 6 December 2016

It's All Going Down In Vange..!

Emergency response officers were called to Clay Hill Road, Vange, after several members of the public reported 40 people were fighting in the street with weapons.
Blimey! Must have been like the rumble scene in 'West Side Story' (minus the singing).
A man suffered a fractured nose and cuts and bruises to his head and face after he was struck with a children’s slide during a mass brawl.
Errr... Scratch that. More like the scene where the Avengers throw down with Loki's forces in New York.
PC Marek Jaworski, from Basildon’s community policing team (Ed: Oh, hai!), urged witnesses and anyone with information to get in touch as the attackers are still at large.
He said: “We originally got a call to reports of a fight involving 40 people with weapons near to Vange Hill Drive.
“A second call then came in to say that a man had been seriously injured in a fight.
“Our understanding is that there was a misunderstanding between a large group of people and he became injured. We still don’t know who is responsible for the attack.”
Really?

3 comments:

John Tee said...

We must ban children's slides as offensive weapons. Your local police will be holding an amnesty whilst they are all handed in. Thereafter anyone found in possession of a children's slide will be arrested.

Anonymous said...

How does someone use a slide as a weapon? Surely, they could have used the see-saw?
Penseivat

Anonymous said...

Forgot to add this to earlier comment. Forty people fighting with weapons is not "a misunderstanding". A misunderstanding is sedating Ant and Dec before giving them a good hiding. 40 people fighting with weapons is a riot.
Penseivat