Wednesday 10 July 2019


“I believe that this incident is the most stupid act I have ever witnessed in my entire life. You simply could not make this up.”
Really? Strong words. Let's see.
Resident Tana Jackson told The Argus: “I noticed a group of three men, one of whom had a hawk on his arm. Another man was walking on the beach with another hawk on his arm waving it up and down making the bird flap its wings. The seagulls in the near vicinity were extremely distressed and were flying around and squawking in a terrible state.
“He told me he was from Southern Water and that they had hired the men with the birds of prey in order to move the seagulls along from the Heene Road beach as the water was being polluted with bird poop.”
Errr, what's the first thing a frightened creature - particularly a seagull - is likely to do..?
A spokesman for Southern Water said: “We have demonstrable evidence that bird pollution can affect the quality of bathing water. This work is part of our ongoing bathing water enhancement programme, which the public very much supports, and our aim is to tackle all the different pollution sources. The birds of prey used are tethered to a falconer’s arm, and is there to act as a positive visual deterrent.”
And an encouragement to crap some more!

Seagulls do indeed produce a lot of it. Almost as much as Southern Water's PR department:
Last week Southern Water was fined £126 million for failings including polluting the environment with sewage.
Get that sorted first, eh?


Feral said...

Sounds like a good idea to me. The gulls are a bloody nuisance from Heene Road to the pier and beyond. It would be nice for the kids to paddle if it wasn't for all the crap around. Environmentally friendly too.

JuliaM said...

"The gulls are a bloody nuisance from Heene Road to the pier and beyond."

They have grown fat on the waste provided by the underclass. Cull them first!