Saturday 18 June 2011

Nipples That Could Cut Glass…

…that’s my prediction for this:
Midwives are staging an event in Castle Park, Colchester, to encourage mothers to breastfeed their babies in public.

It has been sparked by the Gazette report about Lisa Willis, 36, who says she was told to stop feeding her ten-month-old daughter, Connie, in a cafe.
And when do they plan this brave stand against the forces of repression?
Midwives at Colchester Hospital have now arranged a picnic in Castle Park on Sunday to help give mums the confidence to breastfeed in public.
*checks weather forecast for Sunday*

Sooner you than me, ladies…
Mother-of-four Mrs Willis, from Ramsey, said: “I absolutely welcome it. It is really important the issue is raised and that breastfeeding in public is acceptable.
And you’ll make it acceptable by thrusting your, ummm, points in everyone’s face in public, will you?

Yet more of Angry Exile's 'Brealots'....
Midwife Sue Coltman, infant feeding co-ordinator at Colchester Hospital University NHS Foundation Trust, and two midwife colleagues will be there.

“The aim of picnic in the park is to help give women the confidence to breastfeed their babies in public,” she said.
But hang on, I thought we had a bit of a shortage of qualified midwives? What are they doing messing about with this sort of thing?

Especially when it turns out that ‘in public’ doesn’t necessarily mean what you might assume it does.*
“Many mums don’t find it an easy thing to do, but we hope that providing them with an opportunity to meet women in the same situation, together with the support of midwives, will help.

There will be gazebos so women who want to breastfeed can do so in a discreet way.”
A gazebo..? Not exactly letting it all hang out in public after all, then?
Pink Ladies, trained breastfeeding supporters funded by NHS North East Essex, will be at the event.
Oh, those awful NHS cutbacks, eh..?

* Sorry, raincoat sellers. Don’t buy extra stock for the anticipated rush of onlookers just yet.

12 comments:

Mjolinir said...

Doing 'it' in public - so long as no-one is allowed to look?

[Note to self - next time I feel the need to reduce internal pressure in a restaurant, I'll ask the waiter for a bottle, and carry out this 'perfectly normal function' under cover of the table cloth. Though they'll probably charge 'corkage'?]

Captain Haddock said...

“There will be gazebos so women who want to breastfeed can do so in a discreet way” ..

Oh well, at least that's saved me the bother of travelling to watch "Mams in the Park" ..

Will they be staging udder events elsewhere I wonder ? .. ;)

Storm in a D Cup said...

Sooo... the offensive chant of 'get your t*ts out for the lads' will, for once, be reasonably acceptable then?

Furor Teutonicus said...

XX Mother-of-four Mrs Willis, from Ramsey, said: “I absolutely welcome it. It is really important the issue is raised and that breastfeeding in public is acceptable.” XX

When are these minority interest imbiciles going to get it into their thick bastard heads, that what is "acceptable in public", is what the PUBLIC say is "acceptable" NOT a shower of tit waving looneys and their screaming, shitting bastards.

Dick Puddlecote said...

Don't forget about the 'lactation consultants' that will need to be on hand. Yes, they do exist.

Anonymous said...

Maybe menstruating in public will be acceptable in years to come, or a sly wank (in a gazebo of course).

Captain Haddock said...

They could do a roaring trade if they set up a Tea & Coffee stall right next door ..

Direct from the Producer to the Consumer .. No "food miles", No "carbon footprint" ..

The Eco-Loons would be having multi-orgasms in all directions ...

Furor Teutonicus said...

XX Captain Haddock said...
The Eco-Loons would be having multi-orgasms in all directions ...XX

In a gazebo, hopefully.

John Burns said...

You'd never guess that breast feeding was completely natural and normal. If you have a problem with it then it's your problem not the mother's or the baby's.

If the sight of a breast offends you so greatly I assume you avert your gaze from the news stand and TV.

Most mothers are pretty discrete about this and pull loose clothing down to cover most of the 'offending' boob.

As for the comments by Furor Teutonicus, I assume that since the rest of humanity is a minority you really are something special never having been near a breast.

Shinar's Basket Case said...

Burnsie, I think the other comments are more tongue in cheek (or should tha be 'tongue on breast'?)and actually aimed more against the whole control freakyness/'NHS knows best' (as per Jools' tags) attitude of the whole thing.

I doubt anyone who comments here finds either breasts offensive or al fresco breast feeding disgusting.

Leg-iron said...

I have no issue with breasts other than that women tend to keep them out of my reach. If they want to wave them in my face, I will pretend to be offended for as long as they want.

The original issue though, was not about 'breastfeeding in public', it was about the rules within a private establishment. Not a public place. A privately run business with a 'no whipping out the whoppers' rule.

I think these women might find that when they really are in a public place, they risk more than being asked to leave. They risk arrest under the same laws that lock up flashers. This is a country where people call the police to report shouting, remember. And the police actually investigate.

In the meantime, girls, pop them out any time you like. You will have my full support, with both hands if necessary.

JuliaM said...

"Will they be staging udder events elsewhere I wonder ?"

*groan*

"...what is "acceptable in public", is what the PUBLIC say is "acceptable" ..."

*gasp* You can't let the public decides stuff like that, unassisted by the Righteous!

"You'd never guess that breast feeding was completely natural and normal."

Indeed. Just like all the other 'normal and natural' bodily functions mentioned. But most people prefer a little privacy when they carry them out. It isn't seen as an aggressive display of your Righteous credentials.

Yet!

"You will have my full support, with both hands if necessary."

:D