You won't see me coming....
The pressies were the usual nice and familiar stuff, except for that purple, satiny garment from my husband with a confusing number of straps and no instructions.
Once I finish vomiting, I shall need the mind-bleach to remove that image that is now ingrained in my head
My mind is currently boggling in an alarming manner. Purple, satin, straps? Lord help us.Happy New Year, Julia, and all the best to you and your family.
Here honey, let me buckle it up at the back for you. All nice and comfy hug, yes. Good, now climb in to this box...
It sounds like a cover for the car. Try it when it is next very wet or very frosty and see.
Strait jackets must be getting nicer in the 21st Century, as long as Mr A-B does the straps up nice and tightly. No mention of a ball gag for the old witch?
Curses! No page three! Even Murdoch has his uses. Here's looking at you kid - oops - I mean Happy New Year.Neil
He'll be stuffing her into an MI6-issue sports bag next.
How 'independent' can the Independent be with that unpleasant creature as a feature writer? Perhaps a charge under the Trade Descriptions Act might be appropriate?
Having read Yasmin's full thing (she really shouldn't have bothered) I'm left with the with the distinct impression that even the turning of the year - a nominal moment of glad tidings - cannot make the porky sourpuss smile, even briefly.Still, taking the positive, I can now use the word twat in a sentence. So that's something I suppose.
The first comment of 2013?I know, how sad hey? But I was here anyway.Happy New Year everyone and especially to our host.
Perhaps there’s some justice here for the bearded savage-cosseting skank. Oh, please let it be a burqa….
"Good, now climb in to this box..." Buckles, straps? It could be a parachute! ;)"It sounds like a cover for the car." And not a compact, either!"I'm left with the with the distinct impression that even the turning of the year - a nominal moment of glad tidings - cannot make the porky sourpuss smile, even briefly." Some things are as reliable as the seasons..."Oh, please let it be a burqa…." *prays extra hard*
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