Tuesday 11 September 2012

The Police: Making A Drama Out Of A ….

….well, ok, not a crisis, exactly:
The drama unfolded in Barnfield Place, Witham, after a member of the public called police, claiming a crossbow had been fired in a public place.
Oh noes! Go, go, go!
Officers surrounded 39-year-old Martin Dixon’s flat and pointed laser sights at his friends.
How very ‘Call Of Duty’…!
Mr Rudd said: “Me and my girlfriend were asleep and Martin was asleep in the living room. The police phoned him and said to come down.
“There were lights coming through the window. We were told to stand at the window and there were red dots on our heads.
“I could see police on the roof. “They told us: ‘When I say, move your hands and go to the door.’”
When they entered the flat, at about 1.30am on Monday, police found the crossbow, plus a machete and a samurai sword. Mr Dixon, Mr Rudd, his girlfriend, and an 18-year-old who was also in the flat were all arrested.
Whew! Another day, keeping us all safe from…

However Mr Dixon denied the claim and said having just bought the £120 crossbow, he had merely been showing it to his pal, Alex Rudd, 21, in his garden.
A police spokesman said: “We originally had a call about a man firing a crossbow in a public area off Newland Street.
“Because of the mention of a crossbow, we sent armed officers.”
He said the weapons were thought to have been on private property and there was no evidence the crossbow had been fired.
So your ‘witness’ clearly lied.
The spokesman added: “All four people arrested were released from police custody and no further action will be taken against them.”
And what action will you be taking against the lying witness?
Mr Dixon had hoped to be able to find a safe and legal place where he could use the crossbow, but says police ordered him to hand it in.
As Mud In The Blood points out, how is this massive overreaction and illegal bullying to surrender lawfully-held property supposed to be designed to make us feel safe?


Noggin the Nog said...

Police stealing private, legal property?

Who'd a thunk it?

Anonymouslemming said...

That's 4 more people unable to get certain jobs and visas. Nice.

Robert the Biker said...

Police 'ordered' him to hand it in?
Suggest he 'order' police to take a flying fuck at a rolling donut.

Furor Teutonicus said...

XX no evidence the crossbow had been fired. XX

How the HEL do you "prove" a crossbow has been fired, unless Mrs Bloggs is laying there like a bloody shiskabab nailed to her geranium pot.

As I pointed out somewhere else where I read this, they do KNOW that, unlike a gun, a cross bow bolt does not leave powder traces, don't they?

I mean WTF!

Then, given their proven "expertese" with fire arms, perhaps they think JUST that.

Jiks said...

"how is this massive overreaction and illegal bullying to surrender lawfully-held property supposed to be designed to make us feel safe?"

Working as intended. That is to say, keeping "them" safe from us. "Them" being the authorities and their criminal clients and us being, well, us.

MTG said...

Initiated in good faith, I fully support this police action. Those who accept Mr Dixon's plea "I am a serious collector, honest guv" must be blind to more likely motives. Were it the case that the weapon was not discharged in the garden as the witness claimed, this owner's future intention to do so, cannot be dismissed.

This was a decent action and a good police result. Nobody was injured; the whereabouts of a potential Tell are known and the likelihood of some animal or person suffering mortal impalement by one of Mr Dixon's highly energized crossbow bolts, has been drastically reduced.

Furor Teutonicus said...

XX Were it the case that the weapon was not discharged in the garden as the witness claimed, this owner's future intention to do so, cannot be dismissed. XX

Which, if it has escaped your scant attention, is NOT a bloody offence!

jaded said...

Pass me the smelling salts Melvin.

MTG said...

Dear Furor mein,

1. Never shout in my direction.

2. Modern crossbows are lethal. Indeed many are armour-piercing with a KE around 90ft/lbs and a quarrel velocity of 315ft/sec.

3. 'O' level physics will confuse the likes of you but the jargon is necessary to demonstrate to others what little impediment to the 'pointy thing' is afforded by a privet hedge or garden fence panel. Seeing danger signals now, are we? Good show you cheeky, little chap.

Noggin the Nog said...


Why shouldn't someone be allowed to keep a potentially lethal weapon?

Should the Police have confiscated all his carving knives, too?

Jiks said...

Hands are often used by murderers, perhaps those should be taken away too?

MTG said...

The primary function of a lethal weapon is to kill and the fewer people having access to them makes for safer communities. Yet I acknowledge we approach that critical point on the scale of 'lawlessness' when in default of efficient policing, we must out of necessity, defend our families, homes and ourselves with the most lethal instruments we can acquire. In consequence this must trigger daily sieges, shopping centre shootings and multiple tragedies.

@ Jiks

*Don't forget the cases of lethal-thinking feet. You know better than most that some men keep their 'brains in's heels'.

Anonymous said...


You are taking the pi$$, aren't you?

Or am I reading your comments wrong?

If not, then I suggest you re-arrange this well known phrase, and follow the directions - Off Twat You Fuck!

Sorry, Julia.....

ivan said...


In fact the MORE people that have access to weapons, lethal or otherwise, is what makes a community safe.

Deprive law abiding people of a means of defence and eventually you will end up with those people turning on those depriving them of that defence with very messy results.

nightlurker said...

Why is it as soon as I see Melvin in the comments I switch off and go on to the next story?
Must find a quiet, dark room to lie down in.

JuliaM said...

"That's 4 more people unable to get certain jobs and visas. Nice."

Eventually, we'll all be on the damn list!

"How the HEL do you "prove" a crossbow has been fired..."

I wondered that!

"Initiated in good faith, I fully support this police action."

Everyone does, who is unable to extrapolate the possibility of it not simply being confined to people they don't like, doing things they themselves wouldn't enjoy...

"Should the Police have confiscated all his carving knives, too?"

Better not to give them ideas!

MTG said...

@ JuliaM

The daily harvest of anti-police stories provides colossal choice but this offering casts doubt upon your selection ability. Better to exercise the caution of silence than undermine one's own credibility with a blog reliant on the Bo Peep factor.

Furor Teutonicus said...

XX MTG said...

11 September 2012 19:09 XX

Fact remains, they are legal. Yopu domn't like that then tough.

It's called "THE LAW". You MAY have heard of it.

Furor Teutonicus (at work)

MTG said...

Mein dear Furor,

Calm yourself. A unemployed fellow, dependent upon a variety of invalidity benefits (which are hopefully more genuine than your pretence to be German) should avoid exciting himself into a frenzy of incoherent rants.

Had your personality been less than obnoxious and your knowledge of the law been reasonable whilst you were employed as a 'proby' by Merseyside police, you might have tasted the independence of paid employment.

Unless your wheelchair status is merely a cover, please accept my doubts that you are presently undertaking special armed duties for German Intelligence. XXX

Furor Teutonicus said...

For some wanker that does not even know my real name, you purport to know a lot.

Being Black balled still getting to you Melvin?

MTG said...

Mein dear Furor,

A few years ago I was handed your photograph. You know, the one you had taken dressed as a (cough) Viking. I grinned when someone observed "It's Oliver Hardy's afterbirth!". I suddenly lost interest in the file but I could obtain your present address, if it helps.

Furor Teutonicus said...

See my last post.

MTG said...

Mein dear Furor,

It is rewarding to exert a calming influence on the possessed. You can build on your newly found composure by kicking the smoking habit; looking in the mirror when you feel a little peckish and monitoring blood sugar prior to all main meals, snacks, top-ups and treats.

Anonymous said...

It's part of our culture to have crossbows...going right back to Norman times.

I think every immigrant should be welcomed into the country by the Police giving them a bow and half a dozen bolts for free.

Shouldn't be any problems, they are legal afterall. No complaints from on here if anything goes wrong.

Anonymous said...

I am the girlfriend who was there. I suggest you all actually shut up to be quite honest. Get a life and it was legal and he didn't shoot the crossbow.