Who Knew 'Prisoner: Cell Block H' Was A Documentary?

A senior prison officer demanded that a frightened inmate perform a sex act with him, telling her "it's an order'', a court has heard.

Her..?

Indeed. Because this was a women's prison.

The victim, who cannot be named for legal reasons, conducted a three-year relationship with acting governor Russell Thorne — at one point fearing she had fallen pregnant, jurors were told.

During this time, the officer allegedly became sexually involved with three more inmates at Downview Women's Prison, it was claimed, later apologising to the woman by buying her a ring and getting down on one knee, the court was told.

Clearly, an old-fashioned kind of chap...

Not, however, much of a genius:

...when they had sexual intercourse, contraception was not used, and she was left "paranoid'' she might end up pregnant, jurors were told.

Thorne provided her with laxatives in a bid to prevent this, she said.

*boggle*

H/T: Laurence via email