Friday 19 August 2011

Just Don’t Frighten The Horses!

A grandmother says she was left “shocked and disgusted” after seeing a naked man with a horse as she walked her dogs.
Miss Hogg said: “He was completely naked and didn’t have a stitch on him.

“I was shocked and absolutely disgusted.”

The 60-year-old added: “We sort of panicked.

“He was just standing there with no clothes on by the horse. I didn’t look to see what he was doing.”
You’ve never heard of ‘going bareback’ then?
The women dialled 999 and police officers arrived on the scene within a few minutes.
If she’d reported a burglar, I wonder if they’d have been there so fast?
Miss Hogg, who has two sons and five grandsons, said: “I was more annoyed than anything else. You don’t expect to see that sort of thing when you’re walking your dogs. ”
When do you expect to see it, then?
Officers arrested a 50-year-old man at the scene on suspicion of outraging public decency and being drunk in a public place.

He was made to put his clothes back on and has been bailed until a date in September.
Can you ever really ‘outrage public decency’ in Essex..?



Woman on a Raft said...

Sidcup is in Kent, the events were in Bexley.

Despite having two sons, five grandsons and two elderly male terriers, Ms Hogg retains her capacity to be shocked by blokes wearing no clothes because she probably hasn't ever crossed the river to the balmy shores of Thurrock Orient.

They live very sheltered lives Sarf o'the Wa'er.

Ian B said...

"This should not go unpunished," said Ms Hogg, "He should be hung like a horse".

Pavlov's Cat said...

"He should be hung like a horse".

"He is my dear, he is"
Mrs Kissinger allegedly on hearing someone say "Henry Kissinger should be bloody well hung"

Anyway I'm sure she sees worse in Sidcup High Street Every Friday & Saturday

John said...

Obviously the police didn't have anything to prosecute the guy with.....exposure would have guaranteed him some "time" to reflect on his asset disclosure.
That old "outraging public decency" formerly reserved for gay males until the discrimination laws....yawnnnnnnn.....
Still patrolling laybys and carparks looking for "antisocial behaviour" law-guys ?

English Viking said...

I'm surprised the Police didn't shoot the horse. 42 times.

MTG said...

"I'm surprised the Police didn't shoot the horse. 42 times."

It is never for the want of trying to hit something, EV.

Plod must find it frustrating to get sufficiently close to score near misses, only to run out of a full vanload of ammunition.

Unknown said...

MTG "I love you EV and agree with everything you say"
EV "Love you too Melvin" xxxx
SBC "don't forget me,let's form a daisy chain"

SBC said...

"I'm surprised the Police didn't shoot the horse. 42 times."

Why? Was it an Arabian?

English Viking said...


Beat me with your truncheon, big-boy.

I just love those big leather boots! They're so you!


English Viking said...


No, it was black.

Anonymous said...

Jaded boasts on Gadget of being Torremolinos bound.

"If the only jump you can get is the one between hotel balconies, spare a thought for us on your way down, dear."

Captain Haddock said...

"A grandmother says she was left “shocked and disgusted” after seeing a naked man with a horse as she walked her dogs. Ooooh! Miss Hogg said" ...

What with a horse, dogs and a Hogg, I was beginning to think this was either a sequel to Animal Farm .. or the start of a sympathy piece for the RSPCA ..

Anonymous said...

You missed out the important bit Melvin - shoot the horse 42 times - fine - but you fail on omitting the rest of the procedure:
2. leave converted starting pistol nearby in horseshoe
3. call IPCC
4. IPCC claim 'exchange of fire'
5. various woodland creatures burn down London after waiting 4 hours outside police station being fobbed off
8. police arrest various dirt-bags and foreigners who are ritually slaughtered by magistrates
9. Ratty, Mole and Badger retake Toad Hall ...
10. weeks later forensics on the 'other weapon' lost in post.

Anonymous said...

You may have paid over the odds for that 'bargain' brain transplant, Jaded.

If I were you I would get straight back and demand they refit the trade-in.

blueknight said...

All he wanted was a stable relationship.

SBC said...

"All he wanted was a stable relationship."

NaAAAAAaayyyyyy, why would he want to saddle himself with that? Surely it would rein in his drinking and she'd have him by the forelock.

Anonymous said...

Feeling a little horse?

Acting the foal?

Reminds me of the story of the chap who was spotted by the train load of commuters enjoying the company of a goat, unaware that the train had stopped next to the grassy knoll he was using to pitch woo at the poor animal.

John Pickworth said...

I'm actually stunned the woman dialled "999"! For crying out loud! In most parts of Europe sights like this are relatively common (its not that unusual here either to be honest).

I also liked this...

Linda Hogg, of Townshend Close, Sidcup, had taken her Yorkshire Terrier dogs Douglas, 11, and Billy, 10, to a field off Watery Lane with her friend.

Aged 11 & 10? I'm surprised the newspaper didn't also give the dogs occupations.

David Gillies said...

Poor Jaded. He doesn't get much love round these parts, does he? The little perisher, aww. Unless it's the tough love, "he fell down the stairs, honest guv" kind of love. In which case bless his little cotton socks, and the bovver boots they're in.

Prodicus said...

Oi. Do you mind? 'In Essex' - which bit? Constable country, or the London crime-slum overspill?

Wikipedia: In 2001, Uttlesford (district in north west Essex)... the best place to live in England... survey by the Sunday Times. A range of factors including housing costs, quality of schools, low crime... the healthiest place to live in the UK.

It's boo'iful, too, Look.

Anonymous said...

@ David Gillies

Good job she's gone to Spain or you would have 'copped' it.

David Gillies said...

Jaded is a she? My bad. Bless her little cotton socks/beetle crushers then.

Anonymous said...

"Jaded is a she?"

Technically, not really. Not since the op.

JuliaM said...

"Sidcup is in Kent, the events were in Bexley."

D'oh! Getting my 'Newshopper' mixed up with my 'Echo'...

"All he wanted was a stable relationship."


"I'm actually stunned the woman dialled "999"! For crying out loud!"

Someone dialled an emergency ambulance for their cat, apparently. After that, nothing surprises me...

"It's boo'iful, too, Look."

It is indeed!