A pub landlady has been told to serve her customers more slowly as part of a deal with Westminster Council to help her retain her licence.
Staff at the Newman Arms in Fitzrovia have been told they should fully complete every transaction before they move on to the next customer, meaning they would not take a new order while waiting for a pint to settle or while waiting for a credit card to be cleared.But wait, it gets better – it’s all her own fault!
The condition is not a legal requirement for the pub but has been recommended by council officials following a jokey remark by Ms Hunt at a mediation meeting designed to avoid a review of the licence./facepalm
“We have lots of people drinking outside and we know Westminster wants to clamp down on that, At the meeting I just said as a joke, maybe we should serve people more slowly so we get fewer people coming.
“It was meant to be sarcastic but they immediately said they thought that would be a good idea and then we got an email saying we should go ahead. We couldn't believe they were taking it seriously but I feel like we’re stuck between and a rock and a hard place because we don’t want to fall foul of the council and our licence reviewed or revoked.”Oh, dear, don’t you know that local council officials have no more sense of humour or ability to self-mock than a stone?
But why should you so fear a licence revocation anyway? Do you run a rowdy establishment?
The pub is on a cobbled mews and is only open weekdays. Mrs Bird added: “We have never had any complaints from residents about noise, there’s no problem with violence - we’re just a popular local pub.”So, you’re a successful business that pulls in rateable revenue for the council. What’s their problem?
Oh. Hang on. That probably is their problem, isn't it? That, and the fact that they just can’t bear to see people enjoying themselves…
A spokesman for Westminster Council confirmed the proposal for the slow-paced serving had come up in the mediation meeting and had been taken as a serious suggestion rather than a joke, but said it was not a legal condition of the licence.
Cllr Audrey Lewis, Westminster City Council licensing chairman, said: “Staff at the Newman Arms are free to serve drinks at whatever pace they choose. “The idea to slow down service came entirely from the pub owner. While it might have been meant light-heartedly, all suggestions by the landlady were taken seriously by officers because we wanted to work with the pub owners to avoid a review of their license.
"That was the point of having a mediation meeting to discuss congestion outside the pub, in which their solicitor was present."Local residents deny any issues with congestion, saying the pub is no worse for this than many others in their area. Unfortunately, some also give Westminster busybodies ideas, and that’s always unwise!
Emily Cookson, 23, student services officer, from Streatham said: “Personally I think it’s ridiculous. It’s someone’s livelihood at the end of the day. The next thing you know they’ll go to theatres and say ‘it’s too loud when they’re leaving’.
“You either put people out of work or deal with the fact you’re in a busy city.”They don’t care about putting people out of work. They themselves are always employed, aren't they?
10 comments:
No prizes for guessing why more people have been forced to drink in the street..
Oh, dear, don’t you know that local council officials have no more sense of humour or ability to self-mock than a stone?
I think this is true of all Public Sector once you get past 'frontline'
I learnt very early on in my brief dabble in the Public Sector that suggestions meant to be humorous and would enjoy a good chuckle in meeting rooms all over the land.
Would be greeted with utmost seriousness and proposals for a 'working party' to be set up. When explaining 'But I was only joking' the normal response was 'But it's a good idea' or 'Why would you do that'
It's not that they have had a sense of irony or humour removal , it's that they never had one to start with. They are almost a different species to the rest of us, they are THEM
"because we wanted to work with the pub owners to avoid a review of their license
A council actively avoiding action whereby they could legally impose restrictions or ban....if there were a shred of evidence to support claims of congestion...and makes it up as they go along instead...oh and the publican happily goes along with *that* ?
That doesn't make sense to me and there's got to be more to it.
"Mediation" is just a fancy word for "neither side is 100% sure they can win in court".
Pavlovs Cat, Snap! I found that when I worked in the public sector as well. Nobody would say anything for fear it would be either misconstrued or would be taken up by management as an 'idea'.
"... said it was not a legal condition of the licence."
That's not quite how it works in practise.
A few years ago I was involved with a business that wanted to vary its public drinks licence. Application submitted, a few weeks later we were visited unannounced by a posse of officials from the police, council, health inspectors, and (someone else I cannot recall). These good officers basically added 29 conditions* to the licence under the threat that to refuse would invite objections from same public servants. And yes while they don't legally become part of the licence, breaking them might be seen as cause enough to revoke the licence in future.
The above is happening everywhere. As if the pub/hotel industry doesn't have enough to contend with, many are being press-ganged into being part of the security/police service.
* Conditions included:
Digital CCTV.
Signs liberally posted warning of noise, nuisance and drugs.
Drug free surfaces in the public toilets.
Doormen/security staff at the weekends.
Unbreakable glasses.
No alcohol outside (even tough its private property).
Joining the town's radio network.
Etc
Etc
Not bad for a small establishment that served perhaps 20 customers a day in their small bar.
"I think this is true of all Public Sector once you get past 'frontline' "
I suspect you're right, and the top management are steadily chipping away at the frontline!
"That doesn't make sense to me and there's got to be more to it."
John Pickworth give a nice example of just how it works...
"Drug free surfaces in the public toilets."
How on earth are they to guarantee that?!
What the HEL is a "drug free surface" any way?
It means they put a slope on any previously 'flat' surfaces , cistern tops etc. so that your 'charlie' slides off if you try and do a line
"It means they put a slope on any previously 'flat' surfaces , cistern tops etc. so that your 'charlie' slides off if you try and do a line"
It'd have to be a hell of a slope!
Do you remember the song "Never smile at a crocodile"?
I'm not sure but I think it may include the line "never be facetious with a public sector moron"
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