Youngsters at a Welling primary school were shocked to find a giant egg in their playground yesterday.Yes, it’s the old ‘creative writing’ event again. We've been here before. Many times. Oh, so many times....
Children had many questions about the egg wondering how it got there, where it came from and what might be inside it. They put their writing skills to the test by creating reports for museums and making posters as well as interviewing eye witnesses.It all sounds jolly wonderful, doesn't it?
Headteacher Miranda Hornett said: "The egg appeared in our school grounds and has got everyone talking.
"It’s wonderful to see the children so inspired and determined to solve the mystery."Why, yes. I mean, it might have been daft, but it's clearly not a total waste of teachers' time.
Other people's time, however...
The area around the egg at Eastcote Primary School, in Eastcote Road, was taped off by a PCSO, who then stood guard for the rest of the day.*sighs*
Well, nobody stole it, did they? And the invasion was foiled due to expert tapework.
I suppose, to show a particle of fairness, that the plastic was merely trying to keep it from being stolen.
Of course, if he was really worried about Godzilla hatching, we really ARE in trouble. : )
A bloody small nest. No wonder whatever laid it had to prop it up a tree. Be tricky incubating it as well, not least if it rains and the the shredded paper and leaves get soggy. My guess is that we're looking at extinction in action.
The PCSO has to incubate it if the mother doesn't come back.
....and yet police forces around the country have refused to assist in Remembrance Day ceremonies and other non-diverse 'kom-moon-itty events' - now a Mela or a Karnivasl......
Gosh, there's a good plod in the making. Essex Police will be poaching that one.
Poor PCSO. It's like getting a job as a bouncer at Mothercare.
All that training.....
WOAR - "The PCSO has to incubate it if the mother doesn't come back.
Oh hang on, that isn't actually true, is it ? Is it ?
Christ...who knows these days..
What training? CSO's (which is their correct title, as the 'Police' element has never been authorised but is added to show who pays their wages) spend about 3 weeks on training, one of which is how to put their uniform on without looking like a bag of sh*te! One week is devoted to diversity which tells them they must not upset anyone except white Christians who pay taxes, council tax and live in a house for which they pay their mortgage, as these are fair game and are bound to have done something wrong! The third week is to learn (by rote) their creed, "I would love to do something about this madam/sir, but my main role is reassurance and to tell you that despite your house being broken into 7 times in the past 2 weeks, your daughters raped and passed round the local kebab shops, you are not allowed to evict those Romanians lodged in your bathroom and garden shed or to complain that the local ethnic takeaway is using dogmeat in their sausages, you are actually living in an area with the lowest crime rate in the country. By the way, is that your car parked half a centimetre outside your allocated parking space? That'll be an £80 Fixed Penalty Ticket. Thank you very much."
Any other duties they take on are extraneous to their training and may incur injury payments, thinking allowance or boredom threshold subsidies. On the other hand, they are paid more than a new Police Constable, so that's all right then!
" And the invasion was foiled due to expert tapework. "
That's right! Should a cylinder ever land on Horsell Common, it'd be festooned in 'Police - Do Not Cross' tape before you could say 'uuuulah!'
"My guess is that we're looking at extinction in action."
For the wrong species, I sometimes thing...
"The PCSO has to incubate it if the mother doesn't come back."
"Essex Police will be poaching that one."
Oh! Not the egg?!
"On the other hand, they are paid more than a new Police Constable.."
What?!? Seriously? :/
When I were a lad... if someone found eggs in school they'd send for the Nit Nurse!
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