Monday 26 November 2012

Oh Yes, My God Yes!

Greenland, of Folkstone, Kent, screamed, 'Oh no, my God no', as the sentence was passed.
She maintained her innocence throughout her trial, but her account of what happened on the night in December last year was rejected by the jury.
Quite why she thought she'd be believed when the prosecution had access to the phone records, we'll never, ever know:
The court heard the following morning they woke up at 11am and had breakfast together before leaving.
Mr Traversi said: 'On the way home she asked if they would be seeing each other again... and he gave a half-hearted response.'
Later in the day, Greenland texted him saying: 'Hi Nick, just to say had a lovely night. Sorry about the sick and I do hope that you do not think that I am some kind of tart for sleeping with you.
'I would like to see you again and really do hope you do me. But if you don’t want to I won’t mind. Of course, it would be nice...'
Mr Mouna replied that he 'quite liked my single life', adding, 'I am quite happy to meet up with you and do it again with you'.
She replied: 'No, thanks for all that. I have just been used. Thanks a lot.'
She didn't help much by cranking up full 'Fatal Attraction' mode:
Hours later, Greenland took an overdose of tablets and vodka and was rushed to hospital.
She had texted Mr Traversi saying: 'Well I hope you sort your life out because at the moment I feel like ending mine. I have got vodka and pills I just hope I don’t wake up.'
I think I feel the most pity, though, for her poor defence brief, who really didn't have much to work with:
Paul Hogben, defending, said Greenland 'couldn’t cope with rejection.'
Gosh! Ya think..?

H/T: Mark Wadsworth via email

7 comments:

Tatty said...

The two then got into bed where they had sexual intercourse and engaged in other sexual activity"

Other sexual activity ? Isn't it ALL "sexual intercourse" ? Gosh I feel such an innocent, sometimes.

The "dizzy, hot, sweaty, puking" part caught my attention. I think there's a possibility he did administer some kind of drug here but not to rape since she was more then well up for it. Probably so he could sneak off quickly afterwards.

So determined to get his end away he kissed her after she'd been sick ? Well that must have been just lovely. *retch*

The man's a scuzzy sleazeball and...whilst yes she's an emotional decrepit who totally deserved to be sent down for her wicked lies...I can't help feeling he deserves a slap.

Lessons to be learned all round.

James Higham said...

Oh, I thought you were going to be recounting to us your weekend, Julia. Disappointed.

Twenty_Rothmans said...

When Jane and Tina were alone, the former, who had been cautious in her praise of Mr. Mouna before, expressed to her sister just how very much she admired him.

"He is just what a man ought to be," said she, "sensible, good-humoured, lively; and I never saw such happy manners!—so much ease, with such perfect good breeding!"

"Indeed," replied Tina, "he gave me one after I parked the tiger and even wanted a nosh afterwards."

"I was very much flattered by his asking me to perform a second time. I did not expect such a compliment."

"Did not you? I did for you. But that is one great difference between us. Compliments always take you by surprise, and me never. What could be more natural than his asking you again? He could not help seeing that you were about five times as pretty as every other woman in his room. No thanks to his gallantry for that."

After Jane had retired, Tina picked up her telephone and began to type:
"In vain I have struggled. It will not do. My feelings will not be repressed. You must allow me to tell you how ardently I admire and love you. I am sorry about the vomit."

Mr Mouna's reply arrived, and Tina's countenance grew ashen as she read it:
"You are very kind, I am sure; and I wish with all my heart it may prove so, but I was only after a quickie, so please inform me if another episode might be granted me."

"How despicably I have acted!" she cried; "I, who have prided myself on my discernment! I, who have valued myself on my abilities! Fornicate it, I'll imbibe a bottle of vodka!"

Later, at the police station, Inspector Gadget was livid at hearing how the vile Mouna had mishandled Tina. "That appalling cur! Cad! Swine! Sergeant Jones, fetch a trap at once, let us deal with this rogue!"












John Pickworth said...

"... and engaged in other sexual activity"

Yeah, whatever happened to that Great Dane?

Woman on a Raft said...

Claps, whistles, stamps feet.

JuliaM said...

"Other sexual activity ? Isn't it ALL "sexual intercourse" ? Gosh I feel such an innocent, sometimes."

It's probably best to draw a discreet veil of further speculation...!

"Oh, I thought you were going to be recounting to us your weekend, Julia. Disappointed."

Ah, if only..!

""How despicably I have acted!" she cried; "I, who have prided myself on my discernment! I, who have valued myself on my abilities! Fornicate it, I'll imbibe a bottle of vodka!""

That's a funnier read than 'Pride And Prejudice And Zombies'.! :)

Tatty said...

@Twenty_Rothmans....I lol'd lots...brilliant :)