Paul Lovell, 61, was allegedly caught “trying to commit a sexual act with a sheep and trying to encourage a sheep to perform a sexual act on you” close to the state-of-the-art facility on Hotspur Way, Enfield, on September 4, contrary to common law.Just how do you 'encourage' a sheep to....?
No. Not gonna go there!
H/T: Ron Hughes by email
15 comments:
I'm still struggling with the image of sheep running all over the training ground. Do they not use conventional lawn mowers, given that this is a playing field? Are they developing their own niche-range of knitwear and meat?
Or are they training sheep-dogs to round up the footballers to get them on to the coach?
"Just how do you 'encourage' a sheep to….?"
Reminds me of the joke ………..
Q: Why do they shag sheep on the cliff edge?
A: It encourages them to push back harder.
It could be that the sheep are new players cunningly disguised.
Sheep are often used for land management purposes. It's not at all wooly thinking, there is practicality behind the idea.
Being Enfield, I'm surprised that the sheep have not been stolen.
According to Melvin, the worst part of having sex with a sheep is going round the front to kiss her goodbye afterwards (always got to be a female sheep. Nothing queer about Melv).
He's elected for trial by Jury - should be interesting shouldn't it?
Law of averages gives him at least a chance of one of the twelve being Welsh I suppose ; 0p
There were some interesting documentaries on the Beeb a while ago, about different parts of London and how the evolved. One was around Kings Cross and the old Caledonian Road cattle market. An old boy reminisced about how 'dirty old men' would use suckling calves to relieve their tension. Ugh! I read the sheep story , should be some great reports from the trial - -Baaaaaaaa.
Maybe they're using the sheep for landscaping. In the Seattle area they use goats for that purpose. I'm no screaming greenie but I think it's kind of a cool idea.
http://www.angieslist.com/articles/landscaping-going-goats-seattle.htm
I can't help looking at a sheep and thinking not, playmate, but dinner. However there are those who think the opposite.
There is also the fair chance that he has elected jury trial because he believes himself to be innocent. If I was accused of a crime I had not committed then I would most certainly insist on jury trial.
Anonymous plod @ 15:58
I never kiss on a first date and I did not have sexual relations with that Miss Baaarbara.
Bunny
What no jokes about feeling sheepish?
I'm still struggling with the image of sheep running all over the training ground...
I don't think its quite that random. I believe you do 45 minutes and then change ends.
Looks like we'll have to await the trial for the full match report.
Is unlawful to keep mountain goats?
Just how do you 'encourage' a sheep to....?
You have to have done the advanced sheep shagging course to get them to do that. I was taught it when I was growing up in Wales.
John Gibson
"Do they not use conventional lawn mowers, given that this is a playing field?"
Beats me! I'd have thought they could afford it...
"A: It encourages them to push back harder."
LOL!
"A: It encourages them to push back harder."
:D
"In the Seattle area they use goats for that purpose."
Goats are browsers, and so best placed for clearing scrub.
"There is also the fair chance that he has elected jury trial because he believes himself to be innocent. If I was accused of a crime I had not committed then I would most certainly insist on jury trial. "
Good point! But I suspect they have him bang to rights...
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