Monday, 13 October 2014

Oh, The Humanity! (Part 2387451)

A Bromley mother-of-two has been forced to live with...
Oooh, anticipation builds!
...a mass of rotting pears at the end of her driveway for over a decade.
Wait, what..?
Sally Bateman, of Bourne Road, has pleaded with Bromley Council for years to cut back an overgrown tree, which leaves decaying pears outside her house.
The 40-year-old, who has lived at the property for 19 years, said the fruit also lands on her car, attracts wasps and stinks of cider.
That's it? Seriously?

Can't she just....sweep them up? Like I do with the berries that fall off our front-garden rowan?
Ms Bateman said: “With all the hot weather we have had recently, I have been left with a steaming pile of apples outside my house. It absolutely reeks.
“My neighbour and I are both sick of it. They cause a complete mess and even get trodden into our houses.
“We have to live here and put up with this stench.”
Wait, is it apples or pears?
The HR administrator said the council does send street cleaners to sort out the mess but it is only a matter of weeks before the fruit is littered all over the driveway again.
Well, yes. That's nature, love.
Ms Bateman, who recently had a hip operation, fears she will slip on the sodden fruit and hurt herself.
Aha! I see a compo claim in Bromley Council's future!

They are -surprisingly - not immediately rushing to resolve this awful situation for their ratepayer:
A Bromley Council spokesman said a crown reduction is already planned for the pear tree, which means less fruit will grow in future.
He said: “Whilst it is not our current practice to plant this type of tree in this type of location, we all enjoy the presence of trees in our streets which add to the character of the street scene throughout the year.
“The minor inconvenience around autumn in particular, when the leaves or fruit fall, is inevitably part of the seasonal pattern.
“We have already cleared the fruit away once but will do so again this week when the next scheduled clean is due.”
Which makes me think they value the beautiful tree more than the lazy, whinging ratepayer. And I can't help but think they're right.

14 comments:

staybryte said...

The reporter who covered this "story" has the decency to look really embarrassed in her byline pic.

Woodsy42 said...

Are these the same whingers who complain that fresh food is too expensive? I have a pear tree, and some apple trees - they produce fruit and we eat them!

ivan said...

What is it with the woman? Around here you would see local people arriving with ladders and baskets, picking the fruit and happily taking them home to eat - they do it for the three cherry trees on land that has absent owners.

Maybe I should have asked what is it with the mentality of most people, of this generation, that live in towns or cities in the UK, are they incapable of doing anything for themselves?

MTG said...

Bromley should cease treating the complaint as trifling and plant a few additional custard trees.

Rightwinggit said...

I'd have a fermentation room set up.

Bucko The Moose said...

Free pears? And she is complaining for why?

Ted Treen said...

'He said: “Whilst it is not our current practice to plant this type of tree in this type of location, we all enjoy the presence of trees in our streets which add to the character of the street scene throughout the year.

“The minor inconvenience around autumn in particular, when the leaves or fruit fall, is inevitably part of the seasonal pattern." '



That's astounding!

A councillor thinking and talking common sense.

Who'd have expected that?

Furor Teutonicus said...

77 the fruit also lands on her car,77

Ahhh. Poor dear.

Along with Lime and oak, we have THOUSANDS of Chestnut (Both types) and walnut trees here in Berlin.

A while back a motoring organisation tried to get the Senat to have them all cut down because when they fall, the put really GOOD dents in all the cars (Hahhahahaha!).

The Senat (The Berlin Parliament) told them basically, and in German, to go and fuck themselves.

Perhaps your local councils need a few lessons from our Parliament?

L fairfax said...

She got that house when saw 21? Either a) she was lucky and earning very decent money at 21 or b) she is a pro or ex pro single parent.

Anonymous said...

Love the pic - complete with walking stick! You cruel bunch - she can't pick the fwoot up herself !

Longrider said...

Oh, I dunno, FT, I think Bromley is doing rather well on this occasion. :D

Anonymous said...

Y'know twice this week there has been bird shit on my car and neither the council nor the police seem interested. Whaaa! Whaaa! Whaaa!

Anonymous said...

If you read the update on this story the council did chop the tree back so her whining worked.
Jaded

JuliaM said...

"The reporter who covered this "story" has the decency to look really embarrassed in her byline pic."

I'd imagine that helped her career, such as it is!

"Maybe I should have asked what is it with the mentality of most people, of this generation, that live in towns or cities in the UK, are they incapable of doing anything for themselves?"

Yes, increasingly so.

"Free pears? And she is complaining for why?"

Spot on!

"The Senat (The Berlin Parliament) told them basically, and in German, to go and fuck themselves."

Heh! I'd love to see that here.

"If you read the update on this story the council did chop the tree back so her whining worked."

:/